what are common autism traits that you DON'T relate to?

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No meltdowns here. Not a lot of black-and-white thinking. Not that much rigid thinking. I have routines but they're often fairly flexible, especially if I know about changes in advance. It's been very rare that I'd have qualified as clinically depressed, and what anxiety I have isn't usually strong enough to disable me. I don't have a great fascination for numbers. I'm probably a little more numerate than the general population, and to a degree I enjoy writing programs that involve understanding numbers.

I've never been stereotypical.

As a kid I liked trains but only because I was into Thomas The Tank, up until I was 7. I knew nothing about real trains and I didn't talk about trains. I just liked the show and sometimes pretended I was a train in the backyard.
Then I got interested in jungles because I loved The Jungle Book, but again I knew very little about jungles. I just liked playing adventurous imaginative games pretending I was in the jungle, and I drew pictures of the jungle and was drawn to safari toys. Yet when I was taken to the zoo as a treat I was more interested in playing on the play equipment with other children than I was looking and learning about safari life.

So, in other words, I was not a little professor as a child. I was a hyperactive, bratty but wimpy kid.

My sister (who believes she has ADHD and has said she "wouldn't be surprised" if she were also autistic) was heavily into trains as a younger child. I was the walking dog encyclopedia - up to about age 16.

I'm not a text book aspie.
I'm not a stereotypical classical autistic.

I'm a 'hybrid'. That's just not my observation.

I could be the best of both worlds (all of the stereotypical aspie's cognitive strengths and a classic case's lack of social and emotional based ego) or worst of both worlds (all of an aspies' 'arrogance' and rigidity, and a classic case's limitations).

Everyone else is usually either one or the other.



My complicated relationship in masking.
Most of my willful masking is towards this emotional liability I've been fighting since I was a child and failing it.

I can do autistic masking, but it's not the type of masking that I want.

I cannot consistently do the masking that I want -- which is to behaviorally manage the stupid emotional liability.
I felt more relieved if that annoying thing in my head and chest isn't in charge of everything I say, act, think... "Feel".
I don't feel relieved of losing or pressure putting it on like that if I we're only trying to 'pass' as NT.

No one here discussed so far non-autism relevant masking. Heck I doubt it's even ND related so it may not count.


And so many things related to cultural stuff and related to one's exposure in life.
So, I wasn't even exposed to trains. I don't even have toy blocks as much as I would've want it.

There were no books for my child self can comprehend let alone appreciate.
The visual strength focus stuff I've known then is from an old TV program of 'draw with me' for kids and neither of my parents are supportive.

Most autistics I've met are privileged. Many can afford regular therapy sessions, medications, special education, hospitalizations...

The rest are either lost wandering, dead, locked up somewhere like a caged dog, or possibly someone undiagnosed and are called insane/crazy/compared to a severe schizophrenic -- not that I'm aware or personally know of anyone who is.

And I'm in a minimaliastic limbo whose household can only afford a diagnosis.
From 14+ years ago. Prices tripled now compared then.

Not neglected like from some abusive household, yet neglected because of have nots.

I hadn't known anyone here who tries to do the same; coping and "solving" their autism out of sheer unavailability and also not some high achiever who are in the numbers of survivorship bias that can make the unavailable into available themselves.

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1) Feeling "invaded" by eye contact; eye contact feeling like you're looking at the sun; a fight or flight response with eye contact; feeling like my insides are being inspected upon giving eye contact. I'm always trying to imagine how mere eye contact can make someone feel like this. Eyes are just balls of goo.

2) Selective mutism (though I don't think that's actually common in autism).

3) Meltdowns.

This isn't a trait, but it's a common behaviour and often discussed: I don't mask. I do the basics of being polite in public which everyone learns to some degree (e.g, not running around naked, not picking my nose, not telling people they look fat, or saying I'm not happy to see them, etc.)

I never learned to script or fake anything. Zero eye contact and very rare face contact. I have no coping strategies or backup plans when it comes to interaction or even sensory fatigue, stimming, and RBFBs.

Everything I do is a free-fall like it's the first time I've had to navigate the situation. I don't even have compensatory strategies to talk myself down afterward. I have meltdowns, shutdowns, and the whole nine yards, publicly and privately.

I seem to relate to and have most of / very many Autistic traits.

Of the few that I don't have is the inability to read people's facial expressions and body language etc. I think I'm actually very observant and perceptive in that side of things. (This is what directly led me to being diagnosed so late in life, as for a long time I wasn't aware that you don't have to tick every single box in order to be diagnosed with Autism)

Another one I don't have is sensory issues with food and only being willing or able to eat a small range of foods with certain specific textures. I would try, and eat, almost anything. I love trying new foods.

I don't have an intense and prolonged ability to focus on things either. My attention span and ability to concentrate and stop my mind wandering is very poor, unless it's something I'm very interested in. But I think I may have ADHD, so that would definitely cancel out the intense focus trait. I think that may be what is happening with me.

Those are the only 3 things that I can think of, off the top of my head.

Travel and going to new places I'm kind of mixed on. I partly enjoy it but it can also give me lots of stress and anxiety. I often seem to enjoy the memories of the travel more than the actual travel itself.......

I don't have a 'why am I autistic' story.


How I couldn't mistake social-emotional (body language, emotion recognition, tone, "empathy", themes, etc.) from social-cultural (contexts, usage of words, languages, expressions, actually 'social rules', etc.).
I have no issues with the former.

The latter however, I certainly do. Most autistics have issues with both or mistake one for another.

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I think this is a trait of Asperger's rather than Autism, but I don't ramble like a little professor about my special interests. That's because I only talk to about four people in the whole world, and even then I'm often mute with them. I know they aren't interested in my special interests and it feels better to savour the information to myself than to bore others.

I discussed it at length in my career, but that's what I was paid to do so it's apples and oranges.

I'm not HFA and don't have Asperger's. I don't even think "talking non-stop about special interests" is in the diagnostic criteria, but it's a stereotype which doesn't apply to me.

Being overly honest and blunt with strangers, with people i know and trust i am p. Honest, but with strangers, no.

I just want to point out, Asperger's is actually autism Level 1. In 2013, the term "Aspergers" was absorbed under the umbrella term of autism spectrum disorder. Those who were called "Asperger's" in their diagnostic report prior to 2013 are now considered ASD-I. They did away with the term Aspergers because Hans Asperger was a Nazi.

Also, special interests are part of the diagnostic criteria, but they're referred to as "restricted interests." There are seven criteria, so if one doesn't have these fixated interests, they can still meet the other criteria and get the diagnosis. But according to research, up to 95 percent of autistics have intense, hyperfixated interests.