Watching my kid date - interesting situation

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Quantum duck
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

Joined: 8 Dec 2022
Age: 55
Gender: Female
Posts: 208

20 Aug 2023, 1:38 pm

I put this here because it didn’t really belong in dating - I’m not the one dating, and it didn’t really belong in parenting because my kid is the NT.

But my NT adult kid is dating a “high functioning autistic” person and we just had a really long phone conversation about the relationship that for the first time in our history of “kid calls mom about relationship” did not frustrate or confuse me and left me feeling competent as a parent and positive about the relationship. Because it all made sense to me and I was able to actually help and get positive responses from my kid about my advice.

Also, I think I really like this s.o. (Or at least feel positive that I will if a meeting should occur, and if I think about such a meeting it does not fill me with dread. - kid lives far away)

And it got me wondering about culture and diversity vs. disability and if this is how a deaf parent would feel if their hearing kid started dating a deaf person. Like “yay! Finally someone I can relate to easily.” But also, if I tell the NT people I know, they’re likely to respond as if this is a concern and not a good thing and maybe even “blame” me for my kid choosing this person over an NT.

Anybody relate?