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Joined: 18 Sep 2023
Age: 28
Gender: Male
Posts: 17
Location: Pittsburgh, PA

24 Sep 2023, 6:06 pm

Thought I would post about an experience I had recently that changed my view of how friendships can work between autistics and NTs.

I was having a conversation in a small group, and the topic of disability and autism came up. Feeling comfortable in this group, I disclosed that I was autistic, and we started talking about all the things that meant. One of the other people in the group (who I had met previously and had felt an almost immediate connection with) talked about how her previous partners had been autistic, and how much she appreciated our explicit communication style. She went on to list a few other things that she admired about autistic people, like our tendency to be honest and have deep interests, and that she found she preferred them as friends and partners (I can attest her current partner, while not diagnosed, is very likely autistic).

Honestly this is not something that was even in my conceptual universe before this conversation: the notion that some NTs actually prefer talking to and having relationships with autistic people over other NTs. I always thought of myself as just inherently less desirable to have a relationship with for NTs. Apparently this is not always the case. I have since talked to several other NTs about this (including my own partner) and confirmed this is very much a thing. Not *super* common, but those people are out there. It's definitely raised my expectations for friendships moving forward, and the level of acceptance and respect that I expect.