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kpopmultistan20
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09 Mar 2024, 1:11 pm

Hi, I'm new WP user, I created my account after seeing lots of relatable stories on here regarding imposter syndrome :)
I can relate to an oddly large amount of people on this website, but probably substantially younger than most (for privacy reasons not disclosing exact age but will say I'm a teen)
I've been researching (possibly casually but possibly obsessively, I can't tell) and slightly suspecting that I'm autistic for the past ~1/2 year, and every free test I can find online says it's true, but I'm still not sure. I haven't told anyone, so I decided to post something here. I've had pretty excellent grades in my whole educational career, shy girl with small social life and passion for dance/music. Any possible/random advice welcome because I don't know what I should identify as and the imposter syndrome is always annoying :P



Double Retired
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09 Mar 2024, 2:18 pm

Welcome to WP!

I cannot tell you what you should do. Do not assume my opinions below are the best advice.

My advice:

If you need treatment then you probably need a formal diagnosis. If you need special accommodations then you probably need a formal diagnosis.

BUT---

If you are able to get along in life OK without a formal diagnosis, without treatment, and without formal workplace accommodations...then I--personally--think perhaps you would be better off without a formal diagnosis. With a formal diagnosis of "Autism" you also gain the label of "Autistic". People will want to treat you differently. It will always be unclear where you are obligated to report it. It may close opportunities. (For instance, my understanding is it could prevent you from joining the U.S. military.)

With an unofficial self-diagnosis you can still use the Internet (including Wrong Planet!) to research Autism and possible coping techniques. No formal diagnosis is needed.

Then live a productive and successful life. Build your skills and your credentials. Then, in a few decades, if you are still interested, get a formal Adult Autism Assessment (you should be able to afford it by then).

If, at that point, you get a formal diagnosis of "Autism", so what? Keep learning about it, and keep using the things you've already learned. But you will have built a secure life for yourself and the formal diagnosis is just interesting personal trivia.

Me, for instance... I served in the U.S. military (this country likes veterans!), gotten a college education, built myself a good resume, and worked my way to two retirements (that is, two pensions!). And I stopped working when I was 56. Then I got an Adult Autism Assessment when I was 64...because I wanted to know, not because I needed to know. My friends and family already thought I was weird so the diagnosis is just a bit more weirdness.

Oh, if you decide to go my route, keep good records. It might help with an eventual assessment.

And, I admit, I would've gotten the assessment 10 or 20 years sooner if I had suspected I was Autistic. I did not suspect Autism until I was 64 and I almost learned too late...some of the hints I needed could not have happened later.


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ToughDiamond
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09 Mar 2024, 2:32 pm

You mention a problem with the imposter syndrome. Do you mean that you fear your suspicion that you have ASD won't be believed, or is it something else?



kpopmultistan20
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09 Mar 2024, 4:25 pm

ToughDiamond wrote:
You mention a problem with the imposter syndrome. Do you mean that you fear your suspicion that you have ASD won't be believed, or is it something else?


Yeah feel like I have ASD but others might not agree
I feel like if I do have it that would explain a lot of my life but I might also just be weird :P



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09 Mar 2024, 4:26 pm

Welcome to the forum! :alien:



funeralxempire
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09 Mar 2024, 4:28 pm

kpopmultistan20 wrote:
ToughDiamond wrote:
You mention a problem with the imposter syndrome. Do you mean that you fear your suspicion that you have ASD won't be believed, or is it something else?


Yeah feel like I have ASD but others might not agree
I feel like if I do have it that would explain a lot of my life but I might also just be weird :P


I think this is a pretty common experience for most of us who weren't diagnosed very early.


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kpopmultistan20
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09 Mar 2024, 4:39 pm

Double Retired wrote:
Welcome to WP!

I cannot tell you what you should do. Do not assume my opinions below are the best advice.

My advice:

If you need treatment then you probably need a formal diagnosis. If you need special accommodations then you probably need a formal diagnosis.

BUT---

If you are able to get along in life OK without a formal diagnosis, without treatment, and without formal workplace accommodations...then I--personally--think perhaps you would be better off without a formal diagnosis. With a formal diagnosis of "Autism" you also gain the label of "Autistic". People will want to treat you differently. It will always be unclear where you are obligated to report it. It may close opportunities. (For instance, my understanding is it could prevent you from joining the U.S. military.)

With an unofficial self-diagnosis you can still use the Internet (including Wrong Planet!) to research Autism and possible coping techniques. No formal diagnosis is needed.

Then live a productive and successful life. Build your skills and your credentials. Then, in a few decades, if you are still interested, get a formal Adult Autism Assessment (you should be able to afford it by then).

If, at that point, you get a formal diagnosis of "Autism", so what? Keep learning about it, and keep using the things you've already learned. But you will have built a secure life for yourself and the formal diagnosis is just interesting personal trivia.

Me, for instance... I served in the U.S. military (this country likes veterans!), gotten a college education, built myself a good resume, and worked my way to two retirements (that is, two pensions!). And I stopped working when I was 56. Then I got an Adult Autism Assessment when I was 64...because I wanted to know, not because I needed to know. My friends and family already thought I was weird so the diagnosis is just a bit more weirdness.

Oh, if you decide to go my route, keep good records. It might help with an eventual assessment.

And, I admit, I would've gotten the assessment 10 or 20 years sooner if I had suspected I was Autistic. I did not suspect Autism until I was 64 and I almost learned too late...some of the hints I needed could not have happened later.


I do not plan to join the military in the future but I also live fine without special treatment (I think? unless there's this tiny tiny tiny possibility that I do get special treatment but I don't notice it)

Also, twice retired, two pensions? dang 8)



kpopmultistan20
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09 Mar 2024, 4:43 pm

funeralxempire wrote:
kpopmultistan20 wrote:
ToughDiamond wrote:
You mention a problem with the imposter syndrome. Do you mean that you fear your suspicion that you have ASD won't be believed, or is it something else?


Yeah feel like I have ASD but others might not agree
I feel like if I do have it that would explain a lot of my life but I might also just be weird :P


I think this is a pretty common experience for most of us who weren't diagnosed very early.


Well... dunno what you would identify as early but I'm a teen :-D



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09 Mar 2024, 5:06 pm

kpopmultistan20 wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
kpopmultistan20 wrote:
ToughDiamond wrote:
You mention a problem with the imposter syndrome. Do you mean that you fear your suspicion that you have ASD won't be believed, or is it something else?


Yeah feel like I have ASD but others might not agree
I feel like if I do have it that would explain a lot of my life but I might also just be weird :P


I think this is a pretty common experience for most of us who weren't diagnosed very early.


Well... dunno what you would identify as early but I'm a teen :-D


If you're old enough for the doctor to tell you directly rather than your parents, I'd consider you late-diagnosed.


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09 Mar 2024, 5:57 pm

kpopmultistan20 wrote:
I do not plan to join the military in the future but I also live fine without special treatment (I think? unless there's this tiny tiny tiny possibility that I do get special treatment but I don't notice it)

Also, twice retired, two pensions? dang 8)
So, no official "special treatment". You don't need a formal diagnosis to just be different.
- I wore boring clothes...without a lot of variety
- My meals were often repeated I was amused when once a cashier began ringing my meal up before I got to the counter to order
- I really liked some things on TV and didn't explore others much
- I liked music that others thought was strange ("Ambient", especially Steve Roach)
- Tended to stick to consistent routines
- Some topics interested me a lot more than they interested others
etc. All consistent with being an Aspie. None required a doctor's note...just people tolerating you.

Yeah. Two pensions. I was unhappy an awful lot through my working life but I tended to stick to a job even if things were unpleasant...I didn't like change. (I'm an Aspie.) Plus a lot of 50 and 60 hour weeks. But I wasn't much for disrupting my life by making big career changes. (The military has the advantage of not having to go job-hunting...they figure out a good use for you...and they really favor consistency, routine, and follow the procedure. And there are many perks for veterans. And if you really screw your life up, the VA is a safety net.)

Now, I am completely retired since 2011, when I was 56...two pensions is nice!

Looking at some of your other posts I'll note that many characteristics of Autism are shared with other neurodiversities. When my bride and I were researching Autism to try to figure out whether it might apply to me, she noticed that she also had many of the traits. She is ADHD and there are some similarities. I found this table and it persuaded her to stay in her diagnosis and not try to crowd into mine.


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ToughDiamond
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09 Mar 2024, 5:58 pm

kpopmultistan20 wrote:
ToughDiamond wrote:
You mention a problem with the imposter syndrome. Do you mean that you fear your suspicion that you have ASD won't be believed, or is it something else?


Yeah feel like I have ASD but others might not agree
I feel like if I do have it that would explain a lot of my life but I might also just be weird :P

I have that problem too. I don't expect to be believed by people unless they're quite knowledgeable about it. So I usually try to just wing it unless I'm really floundering. I still don't know if my employers believed me, but either way they didn't dare question or ignore my official diagnosis, so I felt relatively safe. Outside of the workplace I've not seen much good from telling people about it (unless they're on the spectrum themselves). Nobody ever told me I don't have it, but they've not been very helpful either. Even my doctor doesn't treat me any different.



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09 Mar 2024, 6:26 pm

Welcome to wrong planet.

I think DoubleRetired gave you good basic guidelines about the pros and cons of professional diagnosis and self diagnosis.

I would add you need to be selfish when making this decision. You can’t make important decisions about your life based on what others think or and especially what they might think. I said might because while you fear how others will react you don’t know how they will react.

Good luck and don’t hesitate to keep reaching out to us.


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kpopmultistan20
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09 Mar 2024, 8:58 pm

funeralxempire wrote:
kpopmultistan20 wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
kpopmultistan20 wrote:
ToughDiamond wrote:
You mention a problem with the imposter syndrome. Do you mean that you fear your suspicion that you have ASD won't be believed, or is it something else?


Yeah feel like I have ASD but others might not agree
I feel like if I do have it that would explain a lot of my life but I might also just be weird :P


I think this is a pretty common experience for most of us who weren't diagnosed very early.


Well... dunno what you would identify as early but I'm a teen :-D


If you're old enough for the doctor to tell you directly rather than your parents, I'd consider you late-diagnosed.


Well then yes if I do have ASD then I'm late diagnosed unless I've already been diagnosed but never found out



kpopmultistan20
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09 Mar 2024, 9:11 pm

Double Retired wrote:
kpopmultistan20 wrote:
I do not plan to join the military in the future but I also live fine without special treatment (I think? unless there's this tiny tiny tiny possibility that I do get special treatment but I don't notice it)

Also, twice retired, two pensions? dang 8)
So, no official "special treatment". You don't need a formal diagnosis to just be different.
- I wore boring clothes...without a lot of variety
- My meals were often repeated I was amused when once a cashier began ringing my meal up before I got to the counter to order
- I really liked some things on TV and didn't explore others much
- I liked music that others thought was strange ("Ambient", especially Steve Roach)
- Tended to stick to consistent routines
- Some topics interested me a lot more than they interested others
etc. All consistent with being an Aspie. None required a doctor's note...just people tolerating you.

Yeah. Two pensions. I was unhappy an awful lot through my working life but I tended to stick to a job even if things were unpleasant...I didn't like change. (I'm an Aspie.) Plus a lot of 50 and 60 hour weeks. But I wasn't much for disrupting my life by making big career changes. (The military has the advantage of not having to go job-hunting...they figure out a good use for you...and they really favor consistency, routine, and follow the procedure. And there are many perks for veterans. And if you really screw your life up, the VA is a safety net.)

Now, I am completely retired since 2011, when I was 56...two pensions is nice!

Looking at some of your other posts I'll note that many characteristics of Autism are shared with other neurodiversities. When my bride and I were researching Autism to try to figure out whether it might apply to me, she noticed that she also had many of the traits. She is ADHD and there are some similarities. I found this table and it persuaded her to stay in her diagnosis and not try to crowd into mine.


Mmm yeah I fit a good amount of those
I've been trying to put more colors and variety into my clothing but I'm not finding much success :P
I usually order the same thing when eating outside and rarely try things I haven't tried
Pretty much the only genre of music I listen to is kpop (username hint) and would be found weird by most people at school
I do like routines and if I forget/don't have time to do something the day will feel off
I have a few interests/passions and don't really like spending time and energy on other things
I don't fit into as many on the chart but I get fidgety/bored in class, don't like overly loud/crowded things, and pretty socially awkward (I hate small talk and never know what to say/do and have trouble making friends)
Dunno if I "qualify" or if I'm just like this :D



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10 Mar 2024, 12:56 pm

I hope you have found these:
- Autism-Spectrum Quotient Test (AQ)
- Autism-Spectrum Quotient Test (abbreviated to AQ) Registering is optional!


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10 Mar 2024, 4:02 pm

Welcome to Wrong Planet! :)


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