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Summer_Twilight
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08 May 2024, 11:41 am

After 25 years of what I thought was a close friendship with a woman in her late 70's, she made it clear that needed to take care of herself and didn't have time to talk on the phone as much. She also said that she was going through some personal issues. Being that we had been close, I gave her some space and checked in every now and then but she ignored my calls. Then when I attempted to check in on a few days ago, she hung up the the first time. However, I thought it was a bad connection. So I called back two other times. The first time, the phone rang, then I called her back a second. "Hi, I dealing with an emergency and can't talk now." Click. (Sometimes we have gotten a bad connection when we have talked).

At that point, I realized that I been looking at thus friendship with rose colored glasses too long. When I removed them, I realized that this friendship was very unhealthy for the following reasons and decided to just walk away.

Examples

1. This woman is very negative and always complaining and seemed to always be the victim. "Oh my life is so bad."
2. Things were one-sided where I would always do all the reaching while she never thought to call me or write to me herself
3. She had a problem with lying about things
4. She one-upped me on a few occasions
5. She has untreated mental health issues that I don't want to get into



King Kat 1
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08 May 2024, 11:50 am

It sounds like it's time to let it go, obviously she has no interest in a friendship anymore. I would say give her a few months and see what happens. If you hear nothing, then you will know.

I was dumped by an EX-friend of 17 years, about 10 years ago. On one hand it was relieved as I was fed up with his BS but on the other it hurt at first. However, I was looking at through rose colored glasses and as time went on, I realized just how bad things were and I should of cut him off a couple years prior.


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If you don't say anything, you won't be called on to repeat it.
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Facts don't care about your feelings


Summer_Twilight
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08 May 2024, 12:48 pm

King Kat 1 wrote:
It sounds like it's time to let it go she has no interest in a friendship anymore. I would say give her a few months and see what happens. If you hear nothing, then you will know.

I was dumped by an EX-friend of 17 years, about 10 years ago. On one hand, it was relieved as I was fed up with his BS but on the other, it hurt at first. However, I was looking through rose-colored glasses and as time went on, I realized just how bad things were and that I should have cut him off a couple of years prior.


Within the last 25 years, she has never bothered to call me and I am pretty sure that she won't. As I said, everything was pretty one-sided. Now that I think about it, I chased her.