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lostonearth35
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23 Aug 2024, 12:08 pm

The "mommy" thing is because the first woman most men ever loved was their mother, and they think other women should treat them the way their mother did by taking care of all their needs like when the man was a child.

Which is really dumb, creepy, and makes no sense because so many men keep going on about how much stronger, tougher, and better they are than women.



Kitty4670
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27 Aug 2024, 3:46 am

rse92 wrote:
Men who have success on dating sites are generally the same men who can get dates in real life.

What you describe is the behavior of men who have no idea how to attract women.


men should dress nice& not go topless, they should have pics up without their ex-girlfriends.



Kitty4670
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27 Aug 2024, 3:58 am

lostonearth35 wrote:
The "mommy" thing is because the first woman most men ever loved was their mother, and they think other women should treat them the way their mother did by taking care of all their needs like when the man was a child.

Which is really dumb, creepy, and makes no sense because so many men keep going on about how much stronger, tougher, and better they are than women.



Don't men know the difference between mothers & women that they want to date & not relate too? Not all men do this.



IsabellaLinton
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27 Aug 2024, 10:12 am

MatchboxVagabond wrote:
Beefcake calendars have existed for quite a while, so clearly some portion of the female population does like to see that.



If you’ll read the OP again, you’ll see Kitty didn’t ask to see any men topless or with partial nudity, and nor did she like it or consider it beefcake. It made her uncomfortable.

If it’s not asked for privately then it’s not appropriate.

Nudie magazines and porn have existed for quite a while too, so clearly some portion of the male population does like to see that.

It doesn’t mean women should be topless on dating sites, and the same goes for men.


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MatchboxVagabond
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27 Aug 2024, 3:25 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
MatchboxVagabond wrote:
Beefcake calendars have existed for quite a while, so clearly some portion of the female population does like to see that.



If you’ll read the OP again, you’ll see Kitty didn’t ask to see any men topless or with partial nudity, and nor did she like it or consider it beefcake. It made her uncomfortable.

If it’s not asked for privately then it’s not appropriate.

Nudie magazines and porn have existed for quite a while too, so clearly some portion of the male population does like to see that.

It doesn’t mean women should be topless on dating sites, and the same goes for men.


Around here men run shirtless, part of being on one of those sites is people using different strategies, if folks don't like it, they can try other sites. But most of is just ignore the photos we don't like and move on. Compared with the hunting and fishing pictures it's just not that big of deal.

Calling it cringe is pretty judgemental for something that's just not a big deal.



Carbonhalo
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27 Aug 2024, 3:36 pm

Maybe it's that American nipple phobia.



TwilightPrincess
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27 Aug 2024, 3:48 pm

IsabellaLinton wrote:
MatchboxVagabond wrote:
Beefcake calendars have existed for quite a while, so clearly some portion of the female population does like to see that.



If you’ll read the OP again, you’ll see Kitty didn’t ask to see any men topless or with partial nudity, and nor did she like it or consider it beefcake. It made her uncomfortable.

If it’s not asked for privately then it’s not appropriate.

Nudie magazines and porn have existed for quite a while too, so clearly some portion of the male population does like to see that.

It doesn’t mean women should be topless on dating sites, and the same goes for men.

Yeah, I agree with this assessment. If women aren’t topless on a platform, I don’t think men should be either. The double standard is cringe. A couple guys showed off their abs to me offline when I was young - pulling up their shirt and displaying their washboard abs with a smug facial expression as if I gave a f**k. :roll: I considered telling them that they should spend less time in the gym and more time in the library, but I decided against it. (Obviously, they can spend their time however they like; I was just snarking. It’s what I do when I’m confronted with idiotic behavior which, at times, may even be triggering or make me uncomfortable on some level.)



IsabellaLinton
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27 Aug 2024, 4:11 pm

Cue Gaston - :lol:




https://youtu.be/MOjquzGpu0Q?si=c05zu80GRkBYx5cs


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TwilightPrincess
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27 Aug 2024, 4:21 pm

Yeah, pretty much. :lol:



IsabellaLinton
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27 Aug 2024, 4:25 pm

Excuse me Kitty, while I derail into Disney.




https://youtu.be/AQ6_GIusJKc?si=MmAjLgJI0qE0O3_J


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MatchboxVagabond
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27 Aug 2024, 7:34 pm

Carbonhalo wrote:
Maybe it's that American nipple phobia.

Pretty much. It's not exactly hard to just skip those profiles as there are usually at on of men on those sites anyways. If we were talking about unsolicited Richard Pictures, I would feel differently, but topless men are something you're going to see in most parts of the US from time to time. Being all judgy about it is kind of ridiculous. It's not like there aren't cringy things that women do on those sites, it kind of seems to me that perhaps nobody ought to be too judgy as there's plenty of things to judge going all around.



TwilightPrincess
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27 Aug 2024, 7:53 pm

People can feel however they damn well feel or please about this topic. They can feel uncomfortable, triggered, or any number of other feelings for any number of reasons. There’s no “ought” about it. This is not just about the “American nipple phobia.” It’s more complex than that and encompasses stuff like double standards and creepy, sexual behavior. (Personally speaking, the most triggered I’ve ever been in my life was when I saw a shirtless man who looked like one of my abusers.) Also, no one said that some women don’t also engage in cringey behavior on dating apps. As one would expect from the title, this specific thread is about what the OP has experienced as a straight woman on dating sites.



Last edited by TwilightPrincess on 27 Aug 2024, 8:30 pm, edited 2 times in total.

IsabellaLinton
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27 Aug 2024, 8:04 pm

The OP was referring to dating sites, not hookup sites.

Either way, women aren't as fascinated by muscles as men think we are.
That might be a comfort to men who want actual relationships.


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