Why do we do things we may not like?

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I am not talking about doing things we don't really want to do like doing jobs at work or doing chores around the house, things we have to do in order to live. I am talking about being in some social environments like bars and clubs and having a drink etc. I could even say that about settling down and having kids.

Even though I've been to some of these social environments, I still feel left out like for example, walking down a high street on my own on a Saturday on a nice sunny day and people are all outside in a pub garden drinking and socialising with a couple or group of friends. I seem to feel people do these things to "fit" in, in order to be "accepted". It does kind of annoy me when some people make out that you are "missing out" or that "life is too short" because you may be someone who doesn't enjoy the pub or club scene or the drinking culture.

I feels strange to say this but I did go with a few work colleagues to a pub in honour of a colleague who passed away. I did kind of feel like I fitted in and enjoyed it but I still felt kind of awkward as I had never been in there before and felt that everyone else has more experience than I do.

To maintain the illusion of harmony.
To maintain... Or induce 'vibe' at the right time and place.

I believe the better your social skills, the more in control of your vibe of choice and how to maintain them.

But to fit in without feeling too forced is to have the same vibe. To 'level with them' so to speak.

But if you struggle with emotions and it's expressions...
You'll likely send the wrong messages, you'll end up with the wrong output.


Yet forcing to maintain the illusion without leveling your own vibe with them or that the expressions you're forced to perform for the sake of the illusion does not resonate is sort of no different than the sensation of masking...

And more so being afraid of being 'found', even more so being afraid of 'killing the vibe' whether by awkwardness or by perceived hostility...

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Because the costs of not doing them are even worse.

I don't go to clubs or bars. I don't even drink alcohol, so what's the point?

I don't have to socialize if I don't want to. My life won't end just because I went somewhere by myself and didn't talk to anyone. Socializing is extremely overrated.