Reeeally simple ways to learn how to do life better???

Page 1 of 2 [ 21 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

Boutique
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 14 Aug 2007
Age: 46
Gender: Female
Posts: 174
Location: California

03 Sep 2007, 9:51 pm

Hi, I am fairly new here and need some advice from some more experienced folks please. I need to start learning how to do everything better. I don't mean excellent or perfect, I'm talking about finding ways to simplify things to make them more doable. bbl.............

Sorry, I was interrupted while posting. I need a lot of help with learning how to simplify things like eating healthy. Does anyone have any tips or can point me in the right direction to find ideas for healthy Aspie meals that don't require a lot of ingredients and can be prepared very easily? I also need ideas to help me overcome extreme disorganization, ideas to help me learn how to handle things like laundry and basic housecleaning, getting finances in order, etc.

Do you have any area of your life that used to give you great difficulty but you have found a way to make it easier? Please let me know how you did it. :D

Thanks in advance for any suggestions!

I should add that I have a 4 year old Aspie ADHD son who greatly resembles an indoor hurricane. That adds immensely to my own challenges. I am also working from home. This is why I need some REALLY smart ideas to help me learn how to make things REALLY easier.



Last edited by Boutique on 04 Sep 2007, 1:38 pm, edited 2 times in total.

ShadesOfMe
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 30 Jun 2004
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Posts: 19,223
Location: California

04 Sep 2007, 12:02 pm

everything meaning what?



alex
Developer
Developer

User avatar

Joined: 13 Jun 2004
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 10,116
Location: Beverly Hills, CA

04 Sep 2007, 12:09 pm

test


_________________
Follow me on Twitter: http://twitter.com/alexplank

Personal FB: http://fb.me/alexplank1


LadyMahler
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 27 Jun 2007
Age: 46
Gender: Female
Posts: 234
Location: Cape Town

04 Sep 2007, 1:01 pm

Hi Boutique

Perhaps give us a couple of examples? What do you find particularly hard?

If you just mean, well, overall, life the universe and everything, well, I've found just lurking in the corner listening to people and being nice makes life better. And chocolate.



Boutique
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 14 Aug 2007
Age: 46
Gender: Female
Posts: 174
Location: California

04 Sep 2007, 1:28 pm

LadyMahler wrote:
Hi Boutique

Perhaps give us a couple of examples? What do you find particularly hard?

If you just mean, well, overall, life the universe and everything, well, I've found just lurking in the corner listening to people and being nice makes life better. And chocolate.


I added to my post above, so hopefully I am making a little bit more sense now. Yes, I find life the universe and everything hard, and I'm thinking that the way to overcome that is to take one thing at a time and learn how to make individual things NOT hard, and some of those things should add up to life becoming easier.

I've seen chocolate mentioned a few times on these forums, and that sounds like as good a place to start as any. :D

One problem is that I need to develop routines that I can stick to. I can start with chocolate. I can put on my schedule that I will eat chocolate at say 11:15 every morning, and that can be my first new step toward a routine that will help me to get my life in order. Thank you!



Boutique
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 14 Aug 2007
Age: 46
Gender: Female
Posts: 174
Location: California

04 Sep 2007, 3:48 pm

Should this topic be in a different forum?



LadyMahler
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 27 Jun 2007
Age: 46
Gender: Female
Posts: 234
Location: Cape Town

05 Sep 2007, 12:49 am

"healthy Aspie meals"

Yes, those would definitely be chocolate based :) .

I think you mean: a sensible ADD diet. Asperger's is not really related to diet but sometimes, if you have the shadow symptoms of Attention Deficit Disorder (which you have, from what I can gather), a sensible diet is a good plan.

I am not a dietician and I urge you to go to one, if you can afford it, and ask her for a low GI diet. My own tips include:
- making sure that you don't have too many sugar spikes during the day (goodbye chocolate!).
- Coffee, apparently, is actually a good thing, they claim, for ADD. Of course, everything in moderation... So I have about four cups a day througout the day
- Have six small meals instead of three big ones, and definitely avoid having a big lunch full of carbs.
- Try to avoid refined carbs such as bread that is not Low-GI or wheat-free, and cake (sigh).
- Read up on the net on Attention Deficit Disorder diets, e.g.:
http://www.google.com/search?q=%22atten ... er%22+diet

And then read up on how to cope with ADD also! It is possible... (but hard, sometimes much harder than coping with Asperger's). Procrastination and disorganisation are the two big problems.

- Try and keep your working area tidy. Do filing, religiously, at the end of the day. Make time for it, set aside ten, twenty minutes every day to tidy up (and, of course, at the start, perhaps you need to take a morning to organise your life). Combining ADD and Asperger's mean that the ADD part of you is untidy, and it is driving the Asperger's part of you NUTS 'cause you want to categorise stuff... It can be very entertaining, but I'm afraid the ADD part has to submit here: Be tidy, neat and organised.
- When you find that you are not doing the tasks you are suppose to be doing, you need to stop procrastinating, which is quite hard. Make a list of tangible to-do's, step by step, that you need to do in order to complete the bigger task. Organise them in priority. Don't take too long doing this! That is also procrastination... but once you can see a path to the final end result, you probably would feel more motivated to start with it. Most important is that you start. Once that happens, we have the ability to focus extremely well, and you'd probably find you'll hyperfocus for a couple of hours and make a big dent.

There is tons of information on the Net on how to cope with procrastination and getting things done.

Good luck. You are not alone :)



LadyMahler
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 27 Jun 2007
Age: 46
Gender: Female
Posts: 234
Location: Cape Town

05 Sep 2007, 12:54 am

Sorry, forgot one important thing which you already mentioned: routine. It is very important. Decide how much sleep you need and stick to going to bed and getting up at the same time. Plan your meal and coffee breaks, and schedule what you are going to do every day.

This is perhaps not as easy with a four year old, but all the same things you need to organise for yourself, is even more important to organise for him.

:)

Let me know what other practical tips you require, but I apologise in advance for all the writing!



Boutique
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 14 Aug 2007
Age: 46
Gender: Female
Posts: 174
Location: California

05 Sep 2007, 2:00 am

LadyMahler, thank you very much for all of your thoughtful advice. I do have ADD and for the last several years thought that it was the only neurological issue that I'm dealing with, but since learning about Asperger's as it relates to my son, I see that AS is clearly something that has affected me very much throughout my life. Because I was considered a 'gifted' child and was the least messed up member of my family, kept to myself most of the time without causing much trouble, nobody ever recognized the signs (of the AS or the ADD).

I will try to refer back to all of the information that you posted, but for now it is difficult for me to process all of the info. relating to all of the different kinds of foods that I should or should not include in an ideal diet. What I really need are very specific examples. Such as, do you have a particular favorite snack or lunch or dinner that is very easy to prepare and makes you feel good when you eat it? I DO need to eat quite often during the day to avoid feeling very sick and weak. I have trouble figuring out what to feed myself and usually end up eating something that isn't very good for me just because I'll feel worse if I eat nothing at all. I'd love to create a list/schedule of appropriate snack and meal ideas so that I can try to keep the necessary ingredients on hand and eat better each day to prevent myself from feeling worse than I need to. Thanks!



LadyMahler
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 27 Jun 2007
Age: 46
Gender: Female
Posts: 234
Location: Cape Town

05 Sep 2007, 3:18 am

I sense that you do need some immediate help just to get into a routine. I'm happy to help with that :) but you will need to reflect on it in time, and please visit your GP once you feel up to it. I'm not qualified to advise you, but I understand that you need it right now.

DIET
====
This is an example of what I'd (try to) eat daily:

08:00 Muesli with milk and a fruit
10:30 Sandwich with avocado, watercress & feta cheese, using low GI or rye bread
13:00 Steamed veggies (preferably something green) and chicken breast
15:30 Cup of yoghurt (not sweetened)
18:00 More veggies, some brown rice and steamed or grilled fish
20:00 or later: A nice treat - now you can have a block of chocolate :) I know it is against every diet rule in the book, but rather have your sweet treats later on, they'll make havoc with your sugar in the middle of the day.

Very important: take an Omega 3 supplement (or a flaxseed oil supplement). This is probably the most important thing that you will have to start doing.

GETTING THINGS DONE
================
Just go sit down for a few seconds and close your eyes, and come to peace. Then think what is bothering you the most right now, with regards to disorganisation. What spot in the house is really limiting you to function, what needs cleaning up and sorting out the most? Then just think about what, in that area, is the most easy thing to clean up? E.g. if you know that there are stuff in that corner that can be thrown away, and it won't take too much effort to find it and sort it from the rest, that would be an easy task and it would make a noticeable difference. Perhaps it is something like just clearing the dirty dishes in the kitchen. Then think about how you are actually able to do this, know that you can do it. Visualise how much better that spot will look if you have done it. Take some deep breaths. Tell yourself you love yourself and that you deserve to have a life that is organised and sorted out. Then open your eyes and just go do that one small task. Just start it. And that is all you have to do today.

Let me know how it goes. :)



Boutique
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 14 Aug 2007
Age: 46
Gender: Female
Posts: 174
Location: California

05 Sep 2007, 10:38 pm

Thank you for all of the suggestions. I will try to use them as much as possible. I do already take Flaxseed Oil (also Magnesium Malate, Feverfew, and Potassium), so that's good. And coffee, I drink several cups throughout the day. I do know that I have to keep a steady flow of caffeine going to avoid being a complete zombie. I know that I will be in total overwhelm mode at least for a while because my mother will be here for a visit in a couple days, and I have so many other fires to put out that there really isn't time to even prepare for the visit. Sigh. Maybe things will ease up a bit next week. And I'll let you know if I ever get anything done LOL.



juliekitty
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 Jun 2006
Age: 53
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,759

05 Sep 2007, 11:48 pm

I hate cooking, and pretty much live on the following:

Roast chicken (from the deli)
Sliced bison (from the deli)
Lox (from the deli)
Eggs, ground bison patties (fry up quick)
Canned fish

I put these on salad-in-a-bag and/or raw veggies and/or cooked frozen veggies (which boil up quick). I pour on salad oil, and bingo, there's a meal.

I also eat lots of yogurt, cheese and fruit, which don't require cooking.

As a bonus, this way of eating is pretty low-carb and gluten-free. I've heard both are good for aspies, and they certainly work well for me.



Boutique
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 14 Aug 2007
Age: 46
Gender: Female
Posts: 174
Location: California

06 Sep 2007, 11:50 am

juliekitty wrote:
I hate cooking, and pretty much live on the following:

Roast chicken (from the deli)
Sliced bison (from the deli)
Lox (from the deli)
Eggs, ground bison patties (fry up quick)
Canned fish

I put these on salad-in-a-bag and/or raw veggies and/or cooked frozen veggies (which boil up quick). I pour on salad oil, and bingo, there's a meal.

I also eat lots of yogurt, cheese and fruit, which don't require cooking.

As a bonus, this way of eating is pretty low-carb and gluten-free. I've heard both are good for aspies, and they certainly work well for me.


Thanks for the good ideas. I really like your kitties too. I had a kitty that looks exactly like the one on the right. I think she still does live locally, but left our family because our wild child is too much for her. :cry: One of our kitties now has a super-high wild child tolerance and sometimes plays quite well with my son. To tell you the truth, I think this cat is 'differently minded' as well which is probably why he fits in with our family.

Well one thing that I must do this morning is find a misplaced book. Someone purchased a book from my online store, but I'm having trouble finding it to mail it. Something like this happens at least once or twice a month. I totally have ideas for how to organize my inventory really well, but still haven't pulled it off. :oops:



juliekitty
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 Jun 2006
Age: 53
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,759

06 Sep 2007, 8:04 pm

They aren't my kitties; it's a photo I stole from http://www.catsinsinks.com

Thanks, though. :)



Boutique
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 14 Aug 2007
Age: 46
Gender: Female
Posts: 174
Location: California

06 Sep 2007, 8:43 pm

juliekitty wrote:
They aren't my kitties; it's a photo I stole from http://www.catsinsinks.com

Thanks, though. :)


LOL, then maybe that IS my kitty and she left home for a modeling job. :lol: