Eye contact

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The diagnostic criteria mentions avoidance of eye-contact, however, I find that I am able to look at a family member's face (with whom I feel comfortable) but not maintain it very well, especially if I am engaged in conversation, whereas, I find I cannot look at people I don't know at all. To add, when I am asked to put my head up and look at the person when I am speaking to them, I feel strange like I am looking directly into the sun.

Does/has anyone else experienced this?

Advice on how I could overcome this would be much appreciated.

Thank you.

I used to have this problem, but not anymore.

Tim

I've noticed that it's easier for me to make eye contact with people I'm familiar with - family members and so on. For unfamiliar people, it's not so much like looking into the sun as an instinctive impulse to jerk my eyes to the side, like when a doctor hits your knee with a hammer.

I think this is a universal trait among people with aspergers. I have it to this day, but i can do it more than before. It is also easier for me to do it with people i know well or my own family. But I think there's no true solution to this, theres just degrees of how much you can do it without losing attention or feeling anxious.

i have sporatic eye gaze, i'm like a gazelle in the brush looking around

sit next to people rather than opposite them if at all possible. Then they won't expect you to look at them.

When I can't do this I think I have managed to pick up reasonably well on how much other people seem to look at each others eyes and I try to make an appropriate amount of eye contact. This is very tiring but I can keep it up long enough for, say, a job interview.

I can look my mom in the eyes for a couple of seconds without issue. That's it. I instinctively look away. If I force eye contact, or am forced into it I feel very anxious.

usually when some ones is asking me certain guestions i cant look em in ye (what have u done?,are u lying?,etc ) i always look in ground even someone is asking me to look in her

I find it's easier to look at the face as a whole, or their mouths. At least then it keeps them happy without actually having to do the eye contact thing.

I can't even really look at people other than my family either, not even their face. It's too overwhelming, almost painful. Just like looking into the sun, yes.

yes i had this problem it is like being shined in the face with a flashlight.

I did some exercises with my (ex) shrink and the sensitivity has decreased. So I can look in someone eyes for longer though I still have the sensation sometimes, and can’t look at everybody. As one psychologist said to me I think better when I’m not looking at somebody, that is true.

It makes me feel that im being rude when i make eye contact, like it's the most personal thing you can do.

And not even just AS/ASD, but it's also common with NLD and SAD.

Yeah, if I make eye contact, it feels like my eyes are boring into them. I can make conversation as easily while making eye contact as I can while holding my hand to a hot stove.

I don't think you can get over it completely, Pixie. But it can get better with practice, I think. There are rules for how much eye contact is normal, even. More than one third of the time, and less than two thirds, something like that.

I find that the only people I can look in the eyes without feeling uncomfortable, are my own children. I have to concentrate to look at friends, my parents and even my wife. As far as I know, it's one of the most common symptoms of AS (and probably some other things as well).

I feel the same way..it is just really really...really uncomfortable.I am alot less able to communicate with people who expect me to look them in the eye. I would crash and burn if I were ever to appear on Judge Judy...she is always yelling at the defendant to look at her..

Today we had an art opening and the mom af the artist was there and she kept asking me all these questions and kept trying to hold my gaze I guess...I forced myself to make eye contact when she asked the questions, but when I gave responses, it was almost impossible....
Also, she kept giving me these mysterious, but seemingly reproachful looks that I didn't quite understand.