Eye Contact and it's relevance!

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Joined: 19 Mar 2005
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,478
Location: Minneapolis, Minnesota

27 Jul 2005, 7:53 pm

I may be irrated by the lack of listening
eyecontact skills here in Boston, and after
a de-venomizing, I can say this is a good
thing.

It is good that I can recognize that if a town
had no eyecontact, and listening skills,
and lets call it "eyeville". Visitors may feel
uneasy. I feel uneasy, and I see how others
may see me and feel uneasy. Isn't it wonderful
to see from a perspective.

Hmmmmm?
Any thoughts?

I hope my venomous thoughts didn't offend.
They were not directed at you folks, but my
feelings of a town full of eyecontact that is
in a physical eye-to-eye nature.

Sincerely,
Ghosthunter

spacemonkey
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27 Jul 2005, 10:49 pm

GH

I have always liked New York for the fact that I can completely blend in.
Everyone is moving so fast, they just keep their distance from you.
Boston is actually a little mellower.

I think that people in Boston and New York, have over time, developed the avoidance of eye contact, to cope with a daily bombardment from street folk.
It is a sort of defense mechanism for them. I have met many friendly people in those places who completely defy the stereotype. I think their reluctance to help is probably just based on a very brief first impression of you.

Just don't take it personally.

Sean
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27 Jul 2005, 10:54 pm

Someone on the spectrum is complaining about a lack of eye contact from other people???

nirrti_rachelle
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27 Jul 2005, 11:11 pm

If you want to live in a place where lack of eye-contact is practically illegal, Memphis...or any other southern town for that matter, is definately the place for you. All you have to do is take a walk down any street and just about every person you encounter will give eye contact and speak to you. Not saying "Hi' back is considered the pentacle of rudeness and an insult. I've had to train myself to speak in spite of speaking to strangers feeling awkward.

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lowfreq50
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28 Jul 2005, 3:28 am

nirrti_rachelle wrote:

Yes, this is one of the bad things about living in the South.

NoMore
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28 Jul 2005, 9:52 am

Wonderful! <sarcasm> ...and we're moving from PA to KY next summer...

Ghosthunter
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29 Jul 2005, 8:31 am

spacemonkey wrote:

Raven
Joined: Aug 29, 2004
Posts: 120
Posted: Thu Jul 28, 2005 1:49 pm Post subject:
------------------------------------------------------------------------
GH

I have always liked New York for the fact that I can completely blend in.
Everyone is moving so fast, they just keep their distance from you.
Boston is actually a little mellower.

I think that people in Boston and New York, have over time, developed the avoidance of eye contact, to cope with a daily bombardment from street folk.
It is a sort of defense mechanism for them. I have met many friendly people in those places who completely defy the stereotype. I think their reluctance to help is probably just based on a very brief first impression of you.

Just don't take it personally.Back to top

I don't, I had to recover from emotional overload,
but otherwise, I am glad to see how I or others
from the spectrum are percieved.

I didn't like the vibe in NY. I can also agree with
that this is how they cope, NY & Boston, to the
overcrowding!

Hmmmm?
Ghosthunter

Ghosthunter
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29 Jul 2005, 8:34 am

Sean wrote:

Phoenix
Joined: Apr 04, 2005
Posts: 1254
Location: The Peoples Republic of California
Posted: Thu Jul 28, 2005 1:53 pm Post subject:
------------------------------------------------------------------------
Someone on the spectrum is complaining about a lack of eye contact from other people???

Yes! You heard it right. Apparently NY is the same,
so says another poster on this topic!

I have made a serious effort to create 2nd
nature eyecontact. I found that I missed it.
It helps me read people better than without it.

Ghosthunter

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29 Jul 2005, 8:39 am

nirrti_rachelle wrote:

Tufted Titmouse
Joined: Jul 22, 2005
Posts: 25
Location: Memphis, TN
Posted: Thu Jul 28, 2005 2:10 pm Post subject:
------------------------------------------------------------------------
If you want to live in a place where lack of eye-contact is practically illegal, Memphis...or any other southern town for that matter, is definately the place for you. All you have to do is take a walk down any street and just about every person you encounter will give eye contact and speak to you. Not saying "Hi' back is considered the pentacle of rudeness and an insult. I've had to train myself to speak in spite of speaking to strangers feeling awkward.

Interesting. We take for granted the obvious, and
when we achieve some of the NT styles, we see the
unobvious! I have become comfortable enough with
2nd nature eyecontact that I am use to doing it.

Then to go to "aspieville" and be denied it by 90% of the
population, you can say I went into a reverse-spectrum
overload, or "the lack of eyecontact" that we inflict on
others!

Hmmmm?
Fascinationing Captain!
Ghosthunter

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