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wayfarersgirl
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26 Sep 2007, 10:28 pm

Have any of you had a coworker who had no sense of personal space? I am a very non-physical person, I don't really like hugs or touching or even people standing at all close to me. I work in an office/cubicle situation, and I have a NT coworker who will often come up and stand right behind me, looking over my shoulder at what I'm working on. I'm new, so he seems to think it's part of his job to make sure I'm doing things right. I'm anti-confrontational (can't do it, can't do anything that I think *may* cause a problem. It's a mental block). Is there anything I can say to him, without making it seem like a big deal? On days when I forget my panic attack medicine, I get to the point of physical shaking when he does that. He's a wonderfully nice guy, other than that, and he means no harm. Ideas?



username88
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26 Sep 2007, 10:36 pm

My dad comes up behind me like that when Im on the computer. I hate it!
I think part of whats going on is that your not comfortable with him yet. I have sensory issues too, but if Im comfortable with the person I tend to not have as many of these problems. I love embracing and touching and all that, its powerful stuff with the right person. If its someone Im uncomfortable with it feels like they sucker punched me in the chest or something. :/


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BlueMax
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27 Sep 2007, 2:56 am

"That's a little too close for comfort if you don't mind..."



wsmac
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27 Sep 2007, 11:00 pm

Perhaps tell him that when you're working and someone comes up and stands there without a specific reason... to ask you a question, hand you something connected to work, etc... your attention gets diverted from your work.

You might also let him know that if he wants to talk about non-work related stuff, that he should wait until you are on a break.

or

how about saying something like, "Until I get more used to this place and my co-workers, I'll be concentrating on my work quite a bit. So if you need to speak to me it will be best for both of us if you let me know instead of just standing behind me. Thank you."


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