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rathermousie
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28 Sep 2007, 12:08 am

I apologize if this specific question has been discussed before. I know side-effects have but I have not seen this particular question yet. If if is already done and you could direct me to it that would be great.

I have been tried 5 different anti-depressants unless I am forgetting one.
Wellbutren, Effexor, Lexapro, Zoloft, Cymbalta

In the first four out of five I had the same serious side effects despite being assured that they were different families of drugs and wouldn't react the same way. For the first few weeks to a month I would have more energy, sleep at night, wake up on my own int he morning, generally feel better and handle stress situations much better. At that point I would start to get a bit of a stutter, which I don't remember having previous to starting any of these meds. Next the stutter would get worse and I would start to loose words. My hands started to shake next along with my memory in general getting worse and worse. By the time I would get fed up I could hardly get a sentence out for stuttering, remember the words I wanted to use anyways or function for the stress these things caused me.

There were probably more side-effects but I can't remember them. On the fifth drug, Cymbalta, I had an episode about a week into the treatment where I was sitting in my apartment on the couch and all the sudden I started to weep and couldn't stop. I just kept thinking that this is the worst that I ever felt and I just wanted it to stop. I barely managed to send a text to my friend that I needed them asap. They had a key and when they got there called my doc for me who simply suggested that maybe there hadn't been enough of a gap between that med and the end of the previous one. She wanted me to stop taking it for a few days then start again.
I was definatly not satisfied with this. A little while later, at least an hour and a half after it started, it suddenly stopped. Despite her wishes that was the last time that I took Cymbalta or any other anti-depressent.

I think the worst part is that I have never felt the same again. I still have some speech problems, stutter and loosing words, especially when I am stressed. My memory is amazing for some stuff and terrible for so many other things. Overall I feel like I have lost some of the sharpness that I had before. Of course this is even more depressing because it feels as if I've lost a part of myself that I can't get back. Its been well over a year now if not two years since the last capsule.

Is there anyone else that has had an experience similar to this? I still battle depression but even in the worst times I am afraid to try any medications for it because I might do more damage.

Thank you for any suggestions.



postpaleo
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28 Sep 2007, 2:38 am

Yes. I can say a lot of what you describe I have been through. An awful lot. I kept going with the meds and it got discouraging to say the least. I'm on a good one right now and I don't drop main med names, it's different for everybody. I will say they don't understand how this specific med works, but it has been found helpful in stubborn cases of Bipolar and Unipolar and PTSD. AS wasn't on the list, but that shouldn't come as much of a shock either.

It can be discouraging. At one point I stopped all meds completely and they were not happy I did. I'm not into making them happy, they don't count, I do. But like you, they kept piling one right after the other to the point I had no idea who the hell I was anymore. There are comorbids that come with AS, it can be hard to wade through them and make it make any sense. But AS was one of those AHA!! moments. In my case I suspect AS, BP and PTSD as the main things to be concerned about. But even with those, I just try to go after the things that are more debilitating. Depression being one, poor memory another. Anxiety I do Valium on an as needed basis. And even that one I just plain said gimme, enough bull s**t already. It probably should be stronger and on a more regular basis, but it's something at least.

I don't really know what to say, other then I just kept going at it. That I listened to the options they gave, the choices and did what I felt should be tried. In my case the system is push pills and let someone else do the doctors real work. Even if I am educating them because they didn't even know about AS. But yeah, I've been on or tried more then you have listed and many combinations for a long time. Some on your list I haven't been on, but the VA doesn't carry all of them, some you don't list as well. It would have been a help to have had a correct diagnosis to begin with. Well this isn't the first misDx I've been told, not even the second one.

My memory has returned, when the depression was lifted. I don't think the loss of it was med related. But you know what, I didn't have memory problem before all the meds either, at least not to the degree I was during some of the meds. I wouldn't go without now because my brain race is more under control. I can actually write, I can remember things in my race that I would have forgotten had I stopped to write it down before. This in itself was worth the search. I had no idea I was Dyslexic till I was able to write. I'm 57, that's a long time not knowing. I had brain race even when depressed and those depression were not weeks they were months. BP never really fit, too many other things just didn't fit it. No BP in the family, but now that I know about AS, it sticks out like a sore thumb.

Ok I shut up, this is the second time I've tried to shorten this and I could go on for a long time. Lol, me being able to write is a joy to me, but tough on you folks to wade through. :wink:


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rathermousie
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28 Sep 2007, 8:41 am

Thank you for responding. I have to admit that this is my second day here (posting) and I am so used to being misunderstood and ragged on in the NT world that I was scrolling down to your post thinking, "Please, please let it be positive!". I totally understand the trouble with trying to cut down posts as well because that if very difficult for me. Though day I will have to force myself because I need to leave for work in a few minutes.

I think my biggest concern is the effects that never went away. Granted my depression is still here so maybe if it wasn't then the effects would lessen or disappear. As for the diagnosis I was first told that I had major depression by my PCP. After the first two drugs were tried she told me she couldn't help me further with that and that I needed to see a specialist. I found a nice psychologist who told me I had major depression but then told me I had Dysthmia which can almost been seen as opposite of that. The reason it fits though is because my depression stays at that low level but dips down into major depression a lot. It is kind of like being on a roller coaster that stays low, plummets into tunnels, comes back up to that low level but never goes up towards the sky or the light. My "happy" is usually just when I am not in a major depression so I don't have much other than the normal to complain about that day.

Anyways, I am forgetting to watch the time. They also said that I showed traits of an Avoident Social Disorder but not all the criteria. Either way I've known about my CAPD most of my life and that I am sure of along with some ADD and a dash of OCD. Though I think if they had put more of them together instead of looking at just the specific problems themselves it would have lead more towards AS.

Eeep, okay, no more babbling. I'm off to work retail. Yuck.



MrMark
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28 Sep 2007, 8:57 am

This is a support site. We’re not very tolerant of people who try to put others down here. There are plenty of other sites where they can do that. We’re here to try to pull people up.

Welcome to the Wrong Planet.


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edal
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28 Sep 2007, 3:55 pm

I've no chemistry training but I'll have a go here. Could you be getting the same reaction to different drugs because they are based on the same molecule? As an example, when I was treated 27 years ago anti-depressants were based on something called tri-cyclics because when you looked at a picture of the molecule it had three rings.

You need to talk to a pharmacologist.

Ed Almos



HankPym
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28 Sep 2007, 5:18 pm

hey



rathermousie
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28 Sep 2007, 6:12 pm

MrMark wrote:
This is a support site. We’re not very tolerant of people who try to put others down here. There are plenty of other sites where they can do that. We’re here to try to pull people up.

Welcome to the Wrong Planet.


Thanks. :D

edal wrote:
I've no chemistry training but I'll have a go here. Could you be getting the same reaction to different drugs because they are based on the same molecule? As an example, when I was treated 27 years ago anti-depressants were based on something called tri-cyclics because when you looked at a picture of the molecule it had three rings.

You need to talk to a pharmacologist.

Ed Almos


All the pscychiatrist told me was that they worked in different methods and a little bit of the chemicals they affected. I will have to go and look up the some of the pharmacology down to a further level because that sounds like a good idea. When it came to my side-effects they pretty much just said, "Hmm, I haven't heard of that reaction to this before."

The ironic thing is that about six months to a year after I stopped taking the antidepressants I started working in a pharmacy. Though I've mentioned it to the each of the two pharmacists they didn't have much to say. I didn't go too far into it though because they pretty much just know me as hard working but a bit quirky. I don't want to complicate things when they are going just fine.