New member here seeking same old advice
Hey WP!
I created an account on here a couple weeks ago, and I really like some of what I've read so far and some of the people I've seen posting. I am wondering if a couple of you friendlier chaps could help me out with some advice. Sorry, it is the question that gets asked too much by many new members.
Without a doubt, I have quite a few strong aspie traits. I have always been extremely introverted, and social rules were foreign to me earlier in life (I have taught myself quite a bit by close observation, though, and I'm getting better at small talk). I am very book smart and score well on tests. My IQ is borderline genius.
I love the logical way my brain works, and the ability I have to interpret cause-and-effect and learn from it in a way that (I'm told) most NT people can't.
I do not have what are some characteristic aspie traits. I really have the desire to be accepted and befriend others, unlike most aspies apparently. That is the strongest example, but there are others. I don't have extra-strong senses is another.
The hardest thing to overcome in my personality so far is that I don't trust anyone. Not my mom, sister, close friends, or often even my best friend of five years. I have never been in a serious romantic relationship, even though I am told I am attractive, I suspect because I am so afraid to show (or even reciprocate) interest in someone for fear of rejection. Any time I go somewhere new, I grow silent and just look at the people around me - friends have often commented that I look intimidated in a new place. Another example - I made some phony name on this site, because I am scared s**tless that somebody I know is going to somehow find out that I am posting on here.
So forgive my selfish rambling - to the question: do I have AS, or just some kind of social anxiety disorder/paranoia?
Thanks for any help. I will be glad to give you more information if you want.
richie
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asplanet
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With out a long history and alot more information, no one could tell you if you have aspergers. But if you want to know thats one journey you will have to take...
My opinion is that accurate diagnosis is generally a good thing, for several reasons. Firstly, if you don't have Aspergers Syndrome, but something else, it affects what you can do to help yourself (although there is a big overlap between AS and several other disorders/ learning problems etc).
As far as diagnosis, I believe that it a process that can take a while. You could start by reading some of the standard books, such as Tony Attwood's Aspergers Syndrome, in addition to the web as you are doing. Can view Full Official Criteria on my web site (see blow, under AS symptoms) and also can ask my on site Registered Psychologist some questions..
Also a great idea to ask someone who knows you well and you trust to give their honest opinion along the lines of the questionnaires. If it still looks like AS, the next step should be an assessment by a clinician who has some knowledge of the area (you have to ask around), depends on where you are/live..
I also regard a psychometric assessment as essential (has to be done by a registered psychologist), plus assessment by an Occupational Therapist would be useful (dyspraxia is very common), although this is harder for an adult to access.
Hope this is helpful.
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Hey, guys.
Thanks for the advice asplanet. Unfortunately, I am a student who doesn't have the money for a full diagnostic, and I don't trust anyone around me enough to have him fill out a questionaire.
I just tell everyone around me that I am the person I want to be, and try my best to be that person, rather than show the person I am, so that I can't admit if I ever have problems, because that would ruin the facade.
Thanks for the web site. I will read some more online and maybe get the book, then try my best to determine myself. What can I do once I decide if I have it?
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SleepyDragon
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I'm not sure I'd go so far. Many aspies would, I'm certain, prefer be liked and accepted in mainstream society, but find so many obstacles in the road that they lose the desire to try.
No two people are exactly the same, and I don't believe there is any archetypal Asperger person. But you may find you've got much in common with others on WP, and I hope you enjoy your time here.
I know they like all the tech stuff, but I got by for 60 years on being a little wierd.
I always ask, "What's in it for me?" Nothing in a Dx, treatment? I doubt it.
Self education, dealing with problem areas, AS does not get worse from neglect, or better through treatment, but we can learn to act.
With limited time, effort, money, we cope as best we can.
It is possible you might just be a little wierd?
Those folks are welcome on Wrong Planet
Thanks again for the help, guys. Nice to meet you Jerry, SleepyDragon, Inventor.
To answer your question, Inventor, yes, it's possible that I might just be a little weird, and I've swung back and forth on the fence about that many times.
I could go on all day about the characteristics I recognize that might or might not make me an aspie; my life has been a constant struggle to analyze and improve myself, especially in social terms. Sometimes as a kid I would sit in a corner and spin quarters for hours at a time, other times it would be throwing a ball against a wall, others turning on and playing with a vacuum cleaner. Is this normal? I would guess not, but to what extent? The problem is that I have no concept of what it is like to be anyone else, so I can't say how different I really am.
Anyways, thanks guys for the help.
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