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nbxyz
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26 Nov 2007, 10:37 pm

Ok, I'm a 22 year old college student, and am taking a psyc class this semester which requires us to write a paper on childhood psychology. I'm a business major, and honestly, at first I just wanted the D in the class to pass and get my business management diploma.
My professor recommended that I do a paper on Asperger Syndrome for whatever reason. Anyway, I agreed and off I went to do my research to figure out what this syndrome actually is.

All I can say right now is that I am really shocked, scared, and not sure how to accept it, but all the case studies I've read and researched - describes my habits, and thought process too well.
I was born in Brazil, moved to the US when I was 6 and due to family problems, we moved a lot (I went through 6 grade schools until the 8th grade), parents divorced... blah blah blah. So I always new I had a different upbringing and always considered my unique habits as a direct result of the changes I had when I was young.

I wasn't social cause I moved too much to have a steady friendship
I talked weird cause of my accent
I am obsessed with news/politics cause I'd usually read the newspapers when I was young instead of regular books
and so on

I mean I read stories about strange eating habits as a AS symptom, well I refuse to eat anything green except for lettuce and peas. I will judge all food on the look, texture, and what it will feel like in my mouth instead of taste. I've never eaten gravy, bacon, most vegetables, pudding, cheesecake, and more just based on the look.

I even started to recall when I was young, I was 10-12 and I'd actually write constitutions (10+ pages) for imaginary nations and governments, and even invent polytheistic gods to make new religions. I'd cut classes in high school to stay in the library study cubicle and just doodle for hours sometimes, and then throw away my drawings. I still do that today, I'd compose a multi-track song on my computer for weeks, and in the end just delete it cause i'm done with it.

I'm really freaked out about this, and don't know how I've never heard of this condition, and feel that if true, it'd explain a lot. But I know I can't afford a psychiatrist and purposely took voice and dictation next semester to help me with my speaking, so I'm not even sure if its worth getting it looked at since there's nothing I can do about it.

I just wanted to vent this out and see if anyone here has discovered their condition accidently, and what is this all about? I mean I kinda like having an "excuse" for the way I am, but now I'm scared I can't change who I am later.

Anyway, the best evidence I recalled to self-diagnose myself is a story I wrote when I was stuck in Baltimore cause my car broke down. I was stuck overnight in a whore-motel and all I had was my computer, no internet, no working tv, and too dangerous to be outside. So I decided to write a story that came to my mind, and after doing my AS research, this story has too many connections to it, and would like to see if anyone else sees the relations I do.
I created a separate post with it so this doesn't get longer then it has to be:
http://www.wrongplanet.net/postp1044457.html



Spot17
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26 Nov 2007, 10:44 pm

Your professor recommended you do the paper on Asperger's because he/she recognized traits in you and hoped you would see them yourself as you did your research. That's pretty ingenious. Maybe you should talk to the professor about it; if you're uncomfortable with doing that, wait until after grades are issued.



Belle77
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26 Nov 2007, 11:06 pm

Spot17 wrote:
Your professor recommended you do the paper on Asperger's because he/she recognized traits in you and hoped you would see them yourself as you did your research. That's pretty ingenious. Maybe you should talk to the professor about it; if you're uncomfortable with doing that, wait until after grades are issued.

I definitely agree with this.

nbxyz wrote:
I just wanted to vent this out and see if anyone here has discovered their condition accidently

I discovered Asperger Syndrome when I was a month from turning 30, while finally researching the sensory issues that I've had my whole life. I kept running across more and more information that made sense about my life and I finally ended up knowing that I have AS.



Last edited by Belle77 on 27 Nov 2007, 12:35 am, edited 1 time in total.

Unknown_Quantity
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26 Nov 2007, 11:12 pm

One of us... One of us...

:D

Yeah, sounds like you're an Aspie.

Welcome to WrongPlanet.


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nbxyz
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26 Nov 2007, 11:51 pm

I'm really having a hard time with this right now. Its like I'm supposed to fit into a mold now? I've been watching videos on YouTube on it, and reading excerpts from Aquamarine Blue 5 from Google, and it seems unreal. I would have never thought that there is something about myself that I can't change. I've been through so many things, that I'm usually the one people go to for advice when change happens.

I'm just not accepting this right now.

And I'm wondering, I heard that its hereditary, so how I'm going to have to approach it to my mom, and suggest my younger brother and sister get tested. This isn't what I expected when I had to write a "BS paper".

I'm sorry if I'm a downer in this forum, there's just too much things going through my mind right now and I'm not around anyone I feel comfortable speaking to about it. So Wrong Planet is taking the burden off my chest.

Aquamarine Blue 5 excerpt:
http://books.google.com/books?id=ujVVnP ... snOwWBX36M



Unknown_Quantity
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26 Nov 2007, 11:59 pm

You don't have to fit into any mould. Don't panic.

Asperger's is only a term to describe aspects of you, you aren't here to describe Asperger's.

I was joking with the "one of us..." line. We just have some things in common. We're not the same thing, none of us are.

If anything, you're more individual because of this, rather than less.

Anyway, get the diagnosis and go from there. Until you know for sure, don't stress about this. And if you are an Aspie, you've got good company. And if you aren't, hey, we'll still be your friends.

:D

Good luck.


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nbxyz
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27 Nov 2007, 12:08 am

I'm trying to relax tonight, and sleep on it. It's just something I have never even thought of.

And don't worry about the "one of us" line. It actually reminded my of The Dreamers, a really cool movie which parodied that line from an old film, and make me chuckle.

idk, I'll think about it tomorrow. I'm going to drive to Borders and buy that book tomorrow morning and try to learn as much as possible.

Thanks for the support and understanding.



Belle77
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27 Nov 2007, 12:39 am

I suggest this book, The Complete Guide to Asperger's Syndrome by Tony Attwood:
http://www.buy.com/prod/the-complete-guide-to-asperger-s-syndrome/q/loc/106/202631653.html