MinorAnnoyance wrote:
People have asked me something and they immediately asked someone else the same thing, so it's not something we do.
The question I have in situations where I'm considered "unpleasent" is why is it my job to make others like me? Why aren't they trying to get me to like them? No one is trying to puts any effort into winning me over and somehow I'm the bad guy for returning indifference with indifference.
It's seems they NTs feel they're entitled to a specific response to what they do. Like if they say something that's part of useless small talk, there's a standard response I'm supposed to give and not giving it is considered rude and a slap in the face. Why isn't it considered rude to go up to a person a demand they give the "secret password" and become hostile if they don't give it, because when someone talks to me about nothing important and reacts badly when I have nothing important to say back that's what it feels like.
I was going to give it some thought before I posted but you wrote exactly how I currently feel. I seem to screw up alllll the time!!
I will give you an example. I had a fight with my best friend, its still unresolved. He basicly said that I never considered how he felt and that I should appologize for storming outa his house and then leaving a mean message on his answering matchine. However is he not guilty of the same things because he claimed he had nothing to say sorry for cause he did nothing wrong and that he refuses to understand why I felt offended when he said I was lying when that was absolutly not my intention, I made a mistake and he railed me big time. He told me I was only fighting just to be right but then why is it he is automaticly right and gets to scold me for being wrong when just doing and saying those things is exactly what he told me I should not do.
Another story from work just tonight this occured. A co worker was angry he had to come to my dock and unload a truck. This guy is known for totally screwing off and talking instead of doing work. As a result I am more productive then he is. I was talking to the reciever and he very rudly held down the horn button on his forklift to interupt us. He then came over to me and told me that we needed to hurry up cause he wanted to go home. I have also told him and others last friday I wanted to go home so we should hurry up, he responded by saying he did not care and that he would go slow all night, but then expected me to bust ass just cause he wanted to go home. He gets to have conversations all night long but why is it wrong for me. I called him out on it, reminding him I have the credit of being the top producer on the dock, even exceeding his and that he does not get to order me to work faster when he wont work faster for me. I think i got my point across cause he left me alone the rest of the night and I did not hear from him since
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These misunderstandings occure almost every day in my life. I have a theory that somehow many people see that we are different, and so treat us differently obviosuly. Since we are different and they see it they get too abuse you and thats fine but if you abuse them you are wrong and the bad guy. I hate to fight my friends and co-workers cause of this, but I know I tend to be eather polite, trustworthy and respectful typically, or I will not interact with anybody at all, I am certainly not known for just walking up to someone, abusing them or screwing them over intentionally and then not expect it to come back to me. I try to treat those as I wish to be treated, but tend to find I am treated a bit worse then others I treat so now I have learned to avoid them or even try to dish out my own abuse so they will leave me alone, this of course has had mixed results.
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DX'ed with HFA as a child. However this was in 1987 and I am certain had I been DX'ed a few years later I would have been DX'ed with AS instead.