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Smelena
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05 Jan 2008, 11:05 pm

My sons are using a behaviour chart for me at the moment! :lol:

The next-door neighbours have a behaviour chart - where they got the idea.

So far I have received stickers on my behaviour chart for:
- cooking a yummy dinner
- using good manners when eating my dinner
- playing quietly by myself (doing a puzzle)
- choosing a good library book for one son

When I get a certain amount of stickers on my behaviour chart I will get a prize. 8)

Wonder what it will be. :?:

Helen



blessedmom
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05 Jan 2008, 11:16 pm

Smelena wrote:
My sons are using a behaviour chart for me at the moment! :lol:

The next-door neighbours have a behaviour chart - where they got the idea.

So far I have received stickers on my behaviour chart for:
- cooking a yummy dinner
- using good manners when eating my dinner
- playing quietly by myself (doing a puzzle)
- choosing a good library book for one son

When I get a certain amount of stickers on my behaviour chart I will get a prize. 8)

Wonder what it will be. :?:

Helen


YAY FOR YOU!! ! GOOD MUM!! :lol: :cheers: :hail:


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EvilTeach
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05 Jan 2008, 11:17 pm

This brings to mind spelling words.
My evil boy as been having spelling for about 5 years,
maybe 10 words a week.

We take turns practicing.
We find that it helps him learn them faster, as he flips between visual/non-visual learning.

I find it makes him more cooperative in that he sees that I am trying to help him, not just impose on him.



thegodofhats
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05 Jan 2008, 11:19 pm

Quote:
My sons are using a behaviour chart for me at the moment!

The next-door neighbours have a behaviour chart - where they got the idea.

So far I have received stickers on my behaviour chart for:
- cooking a yummy dinner
- using good manners when eating my dinner
- playing quietly by myself (doing a puzzle)
- choosing a good library book for one son

When I get a certain amount of stickers on my behaviour chart I will get a prize.

Wonder what it will be.


That's so cute!



AussieBoy
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05 Jan 2008, 11:33 pm

:)



SleepyDragon
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06 Jan 2008, 3:45 am

Psst! AussieBoy & UbbyUbbyUbby! Give your mum one of these.

Image

No, wait, there are two of you. Better make it TWO. :D



Pandora
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06 Jan 2008, 6:48 am

Cornettos are nice, too.


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equinn
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06 Jan 2008, 9:00 am

very cute. :D

I like this one:

didn't lose my patience today

(of course me asking my son to put on his coat for the 5th time in a stern voice is considered losing my patience according to his perceptions--so, I probably wouldn't ever get a sticker there).

equinn



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06 Jan 2008, 9:06 am

Is it possible to get your son a coat in a lighter material as he might be feeling too hot in the other one.


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equinn
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06 Jan 2008, 9:16 am

I feel like I don't spend enough time with my ds. He's an only child and we tend to do our own things. When I enter the livingroom (his area) he usually wants me OUT.

He's eight-years old, and I do ask if he wants to play cards, chess, a game--but it's always no.

I do wish I was a more interesting person who knew lots of facts about math, science--anything, because then I would have his attention (I think). So, when he does ask me questions, I don't have an answer or I say I'll google it or he forgets or I try to guess but it's not usually accurate and he knows it. I think if I were the right type of person, I'd be able to do so much more for him. Instead, I sit and write on my computer (working on a novel) or read and he does his quiirky things--lately it has to do with adhesives (stapling, gluing, hammering---who knows what).

My point being if I were smarter in the right way, maybe he'd be more involved in other things. He always has these grand ideas of creating and making something (yesterday it was a disco ball and he was going to use the lamp) but I said no and that was it, explaining why he couldn't put an object over the lightbulb that he could cause a fire. But later in the day, he kept on about the lightbulb and said we shouldn't leave it on because it could cause a fire. I had to explain that no it wouldn't, but I couldn't explain what temp the heat is or anything other than my superficial laypeson's knowledge--I know he's looking for more. He always wants to know how hot ,how big, how much something is. Frankly, it gets to me sometimes. These things are not and never have held my interest. I guess he could read about it--but he won't read even though he's tested as an excellent reader so I know he can read. His gifted verbally.
Maybe it's just a phase? I always think of how much he would knkow if he would read because he seems to know so much without reading!

btw--he has quirky interests--latest one is a bamboo bathroom mat (no kidding) $5.00 at marshalls and he's rolling it up, dancing on it, laying on it--He insisted on bringing it into the groceery store and was dancing, spinning on it. when I told him you could get bigger ones (he asked) he was ecstatic. I just don't get it. He's always loved mirrors too. I imagine him older, with a house filled with mirrors, disco balls, bamboo flooring, shelves filled with assortments of tools, (oh, he loves hooks too) so he'd have lots of hooks adhered to the wall with super puddy. :P

Come on you aspies--any comments/advice??????
equinn



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06 Jan 2008, 1:06 pm

equinn, that sounds like tactile curiosity or sensory-seeking.

As far as the creative stuff goes, does he have any age-appropriate science kits? Go to a hobby shop or find a science experiment book. There are projects your son could do that wouldn't burn the house down.
I got my son two books that have old-fashioned "boy's information". Some are pranks, some are advice on talking to girls and some are building hobby stuff like kites, models and paper hats.

I can say that at 7-8 I wasn't hanging out with my folks at all. I was far into my music and dancing obsessions. They were into tv and arguing and eating too much. My brother was an outdoors person.

I try to meet my son half way and play some video games with him, I learn the lingo. I also just bought a "No Stress Chess" game that uses cards to instruct you how to play. It's a lot of fun.

As far as the OP goes, I get hugs. I did stickers at one time but I've dropped the behavior chart mostly. I need to start it up again, school's starting. 8O



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06 Jan 2008, 1:07 pm

equinn, have you tried looking it up together with him? It doesn't become clear from the text. If he doesn't want to read - say you can look it up together and you'll read the answer out loud. But you won't look it up for him, doing all the work, while he spends time playing in another room, so he ought to come with you and help you, thinking about what words to type into google, going through the information together with you.

And that disco ball, well, you did the right thing in explaining why he can't risk setting the house on fire (although he seemed to took it literal), but have you considered another way, another material to make it and mentioned it to him?

If you find that you can't explain why something is the way it is - why not try it out? Although it's probably not a good idea to set something on fire in the oven, as he may take the clue to try it himself, I'm sure that there are plenty of other opportunity to experiment and by this answer a question. There are lots of children's books like that, about examples of harmless and simple experiments. (Just remember to not leave your son and such a book unsupervised in the house, somehow I imagine that's not a good idea, oh dear.)
Can you imagine your son being interested in this and of course, can you imagine yourself getting interested in such things? Maybe it'll interest you and you just don't know it yet, because you haven't tried it out.

That's as much as I can think of being child-less and young.


Geesh, I don't think you should say something like 'If you were a more interesting person, then...' No doubt, you are the right person and act in your son's best interest. You're interested in him and you're eager to satisfy your son's wishes even if they're about light bulbs and physics, maths which don't interest you. Now really, what more do you think is needed and what do you think about how many parents are all-knowing when it comes to their children's questions?



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06 Jan 2008, 3:57 pm

equinn wrote:
I feel like I don't spend enough time with my ds. He's an only child and we tend to do our own things. When I enter the livingroom (his area) he usually wants me OUT.



My son is 9 and an only child. I can not separate from him. He's always on my heels. I wish someone had some advice for me. I feel like he's too dependent on me. This behavior got him in trouble at school too. He would not sit there and work on handouts by himself. He needed an aide to sit by him and approve each answer as he wrote it down. If he was left alone, he got disruptive.



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06 Jan 2008, 11:49 pm

that is so funny Smelena! It sounds like something my boys would do!


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07 Jan 2008, 9:57 am

Tortuga wrote:
equinn wrote:
I feel like I don't spend enough time with my ds. He's an only child and we tend to do our own things. When I enter the livingroom (his area) he usually wants me OUT.



My son is 9 and an only child. I can not separate from him. He's always on my heels. I wish someone had some advice for me. I feel like he's too dependent on me. This behavior got him in trouble at school too. He would not sit there and work on handouts by himself. He needed an aide to sit by him and approve each answer as he wrote it down. If he was left alone, he got disruptive.
He was probably really anxious that he would get answers wrong and get in trouble. It sounds like a confidence issue. He might not understand what they are asking on the worksheet either.


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Smelena
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07 Jan 2008, 5:59 pm

AussieBoy (my 9 year old son) picked me some flowers from the garden. :D

Helen