Keeping this mask is extremely draining for me, which is the reason for I avoiding social events whenever I can.
Lately I've been trying to be somehow more autentic, which means just being the introverted and quiet person I am, and not forcing myself to make boring small talk, smile, etc.
Yeah, people can think whatever they want, but I'll just not try to be like them anymore. That's my goal for now, of completely getting rid of the need to put this mask.