Does anyone have trouble holding on to their jobs?

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Papillon
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18 Mar 2006, 6:54 pm

Sundy wrote

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Has anyone else had a really good boss that helped them be successful at work?


Sundy,

My present employer seems to hold the kind of promice you mention in your post. However, I'm hired there as an on-call / casual. They did ask me to increase my hours with them but I made it clear that only upon the offer of a full-time position (for which they'd have to give raises, promotions, and benefits) would I consider.

As it stands, the way I have it set up is that I continue to collect a disability pension that is downsized to a minimal amount due to the deductions from declared working earnings. That is I'm working the maximum hours that I can without completely losing the disability pension and the medical / dental coverage that comes with it.

OTOH, if it ever comes down to my being terminated, I could fall back on the Disability Support system with a minimum of fuss for the time being.

I do have the option of working all the overtime I could handle but being just an on-call / casual, that means I'd lose my Disability Support plan and have to pay my medical / dental out of my pocket, thus defeating the purpose.

Any two can play hardball :wink:


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19 Mar 2006, 9:10 pm

I have had real problems both obtaining employment, and keeping employment.

First job after leaving university was in a small office, only me and the Director in a business that was just starting up. Was forced to work at least 12 hours almost every day with no holidays for 2 years, under severe guilt tripping.... just because the Director did that. Was totally burnt out and was fired, the reason being alleged non-performance.

Took 8, maybe 9 months to get a permanent job after that, although in that period I had a job which was supposed to be permanent, but I was let go after a month.

Next (permanent) job lasted 2 years, was in a traffic/transport company. A much fairer company which didn't take advantage of me, but my performance was very poor because of what had happened in my career previously, and was made redundant.

3 weeks after that I started a job as an office manager in a chain of sports shops. I was there for 4½ years, not bad I admit, until they made me redundant 2 months ago. While most employees worked with each other in the branches, I worked alone with the two directors in the office. The directors regularly verbally abused me, reguarly threatened me with the sack, and hardly ever spoke to me as if I was a human being.

Now unemployed, and having difficulty getting a job again. Getting masses of interviews, as my experience os obviously very good, but not being successful at interviews. No wonder I can't wait to get diagnosed with AS or HFA. Maybe, as some people say, it'll be harder to find work because employers will look at the disability, but at least (I hope) it'll protect me from situations like the above.

Finally, now that I know I have either AS or HFA, I can't help but think that major, shocking judgment is coming soon to the bosses mentioned above because of how they 'managed' an AS/HFA guy.



Hel
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22 Mar 2006, 6:23 am

Every time I start a new job I seem to have a sort of low-level paranoia thing where I am convinced that I am going to mess something up in a huge way and get fired. This can last anything from six months to a year or more.

My first proper job was in a supermarket and I grew to hate having customers hold me personally responsible every time we ran out of something. They all seemed to think that they were each the most important customer in the world..I hate that :evil: Don't get me wrong, they have every right to expect decent service but it is the way some people go about complaining that really bothers me. Let's just say I had a new found respect for shopworkers after working there.

After that I worked in a smaller shop and it was awful. I never knew who I was supposed to be answerable to because I was bossed around by whoever thought they were in charge on the day...I also still took things really personally if they were said to me in the wrong way. Looking back I can see that a lot of my problems there were attributable to AS, but back then I had never heard of the condition. My concrete and literal thinking gave me the worst trouble. Someone would ask for something to be done in a very precise way and I would do it like that regardless of who was in charge. Then another person would come along and ask for me to do it their way instead and I would spend the rest of the week chasing my tail trying to please people, some days I would just stand there pondering the consequences of what would happen if I did it first one way and then the other way, paralysed by confusion and a sense of unfairness. Inevitably I would be in trouble with the person whose work methods I didn't choose to follow (I could never hope to win so why did I spend so long pondering the consequences of my actions?)

I had a job in a pub but was sacked after six weeks (either because I couldn't make small talk and banter with people or because I was appallingly bad at pulling pints; not sure which). I had trouble recognising people's faces back then I think. People would order food and I had to take it over to them. I could never remember who had ordered what, I had trouble putting faces to names. I think some of it was nerves actually. I am also hard-core vegetarian so didn't know the difference between roast beef and roast lamb (try explaining that to a pub full of hungry punters on a sunday lunch time :) ) I'd be handed the food (usually two or three plates at a time, bearing in mind I am clumsy too) and left to stagger out blindly through a roomful of people, too scared to let on that I didn't have a clue what i was doing or who was who. Actually I am starting to see why they fired me. :lol: I couldn't tell when the customers were joking with me and when they were serious (took everything literally) so would have had no idea whether I was doing a good job or not...I also find drunken noisy people intimidating so have no real idea why I took a job there in the first place LOL

I worked in a factory for about five months and left because of the mind-numbing boredom (I wasn't fast enough at the job either)

I worked briefly in a drop-in centre as an admin assistant. There wasn't much to do in the way of admin. The boss was always off talking to people (it was her job to talk all day. She was very good at it but didn't seem able to find much for me to do) All I really did was make tea all day. I had no idea what to say to visitors (what do you say to women who are in refuges when you have no idea of what they've been through, without sounding patronising?) One day the boss had me in to her office to tell me I wasn't using my initiative enough. Apparently I wasn't finding myself enough things to do. She also told me I had no organisational skills which made me really angry :evil: as I am possibly the most anally-organised person I know. I ended up bursting into tears because I couldn't express how I was really feeling. This is one of my biggest problems; telling people I disagree with them. I only tend to do it with close friends and family and it comes out in a blunt and offensive way. So I usually hide my true feelings the rest of the time and pretend to be ok.

I am currently working in an office and have to inspect signs for spelling and grammar. I find it enjoyable 'cos it gives me the chance to do something I am really good at and I finally have a job where I feel valued a little bit. I have been criticised for being too picky though, apparently it slows production down or something if we do things too right :lol:

My main problem at work is that I usually feel as if I am working flat out to keep up with everyone else. (It's really exhausting; I never can tell whether I am working as hard, less hard or harder than other people). And when I do have the odd good day and am happy because I've got on top of whatever it is I'm supposed to be doing, instead of someone saying "well done" or "thankyou" I just get handed a load more work to do which has the effect of deflating any good feelings that have built up inside me...(I also feel really hard done by if I feel that I'm working really hard and other people are skiving)
Does anyone else have this problem? I'd be really interested to know.



k96822
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22 Mar 2006, 9:09 am

We are so much alike! I too go into every job wondering how long it will take before I miss some crucial cue from the social network and lose my job. Current record: 2 years, but that was out of an experiment to see how bad bad can get (I pushed the system).

Hel wrote:
My main problem at work is that I usually feel as if I am working flat out to keep up with everyone else. (It's really exhausting; I never can tell whether I am working as hard, less hard or harder than other people). And when I do have the odd good day and am happy because I've got on top of whatever it is I'm supposed to be doing, instead of someone saying "well done" or "thankyou" I just get handed a load more work to do which has the effect of deflating any good feelings that have built up inside me...(I also feel really hard done by if I feel that I'm working really hard and other people are skiving)
Does anyone else have this problem? I'd be really interested to know.


Although programming is my obsession and I am faster and more precise than my peers, I have definitely found that I can't keep up socially. I have to work so hard to break even throughout the day socially and I find that very exhausting. There is SO MUCH SOCIAL DATA flying around me and I only get, maybe, 10% of it. And that is with trying and from vocal messages; when it comes to body-language, I'm competely tone-deaf. It is far more exhausting than my actual work.

I also found, like yourself, criticized for being too precise for when I wanted to have a coding standard - any coding standard. Strict discipline while making software is what makes software work and saves a great deal of time. He doesn't get that, though, which is why he works morning to night seven-days a week unable to get his head above water. At least he realizes (and has expressed) that I am "saving his a**" often. Of course, when that ends, it is off with my head, I'm sure, but I'm a contractor, so I've learned how to adapt and not have to make my resume too long as a result of that kind of stuff :-)

I've never failed to produce a stable product that exceeded the customer's expectations on or before the due date. For some reason, that doesn't seem to matter much.



bonzo_dog
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02 Aug 2006, 9:51 pm

:cry:

My first ten years out of school were pretty uneventful -- I was steadily employed the whole time, quitting just once just to move to another state. Then in 1993 I was laid off -- and everything went to pieces. Since then, I have been fully employed in a professional capacity for a total of about 30 months (just one or two since 2001), and have been involuntarily terminated TEN more times. In most of those jobs I didn't last a month; the shortest was two days. One big difference between the first ten years and afterwards was that the first ten years were all spent in big aerospace companies; most of what I have had since then has been at itty-bitty companies with no job security (mainly because those have been the jobs I have been offered.)



k96822
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03 Aug 2006, 9:00 am

Wow :cry:, 10 times! That is bad luck. This industry is rough. The best seem to be the first to go. As someone said in the office here a few days ago, people do not want to hire people smarter than them and incompetence helps incompetence.



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03 Aug 2006, 9:47 am

As I posted above I have great difficulties maintaining employment. I have a job now but that is because someone gave me the job because that person is a friend. As well, I've been allowed to take as much time as I need to learn the job. I work unpaid overtime to try to ensure that my production is the same as the other workers.

I just wanted to add that throughout my life, whenever I was fired or unable to get a job, I always felt like there was something important that I was supposed to be doing, I just had not figured out what that thing was yet. I always felt that life was/is pushing me to do what I am supposed to be doing, and it's taken me years to figure out what I would have realized in the very beginning, if I hadn't been so busy trying to fit into the NT slots. I now believe that there is some biological or sociological or cultural imperative pushing me to make use of my specific strengths and talents, rather than try to fit into the NT world of employment. I believe that aspie brains are useful, and that we, as biological or sociological or cutlural or even spiritual entities, whatever, have a social function, but that corporatized society doesn't recognize our function yet because the market structure doesn't make much allowance for how our neurodiverse brains function.

Has anyone else felt this uncanny feeling that they are supposed to be doing something, some very important thing, and can't quite figure out what it is they are supposed to be doing? Do you ever have the feeling that you are being pushed by life forces, the universe, whatever energy might exist in the world, to fulfill some important function?



k96822
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03 Aug 2006, 1:07 pm

Yeah, although usually people get mad at me because they push me and much of the time I don't notice it, so they get insulted (assuming I'm ignoring on them on purpose because they do not mean anything to me or something) and make it real obvious.

One example is where I refuse to get married. I find NT males hard to figure out enough, but NT women; well, whew, no way! I think I'd have to apply chaos theory to even break even with the average NT male on that subject. Because I do not marry, I get that pushing from relatives. Sometimes, it is right out in the open. "So, when am I going to have grandchildren?" Sometimes, it is slapping some toddler on my lap and making me play with him while nodding and giving each other secret looks.

Society definitely tries to mold you into what they want! However, I have observed that humans want other people in a place where they can feel better about themselves, very often at your expense. That is why I give society the proverbial finger. If they had their way, I'd be nothing so they do not feel threatened.

Don't worry about them -- God has given you a gifted path. Let those NT's live their mundane lives while we live blessed ones!! !



Papillon
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03 Aug 2006, 5:03 pm

anandamide wrote:
As I posted above I have great difficulties maintaining employment. I have a job now but that is because someone gave me the job because that person is a friend. As well, I've been allowed to take as much time as I need to learn the job. I work unpaid overtime to try to ensure that my production is the same as the other workers.

I just wanted to add that throughout my life, whenever I was fired or unable to get a job, I always felt like there was something important that I was supposed to be doing, I just had not figured out what that thing was yet. I always felt that life was/is pushing me to do what I am supposed to be doing, and it's taken me years to figure out what I would have realized in the very beginning, if I hadn't been so busy trying to fit into the NT slots. I now believe that there is some biological or sociological or cultural imperative pushing me to make use of my specific strengths and talents, rather than try to fit into the NT world of employment. I believe that aspie brains are useful, and that we, as biological or sociological or cutlural or even spiritual entities, whatever, have a social function, but that corporatized society doesn't recognize our function yet because the market structure doesn't make much allowance for how our neurodiverse brains function.

Has anyone else felt this uncanny feeling that they are supposed to be doing something, some very important thing, and can't quite figure out what it is they are supposed to be doing? Do you ever have the feeling that you are being pushed by life forces, the universe, whatever energy might exist in the world, to fulfill some important function?


Hey anandamide,

I like your perception. I can relate to what you're saying here and if I could answer that Q, I'd be the first to do so :wink:


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waterdogs
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07 Aug 2006, 12:00 am

i've only had a couple of jobs in my life, and didn't have them for very long. i wish i could give you advice but i need advice on how to keep a job aswell. :)



ffanken
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07 Aug 2006, 9:09 am

waterdogs wrote:
i've only had a couple of jobs in my life, and didn't have them for very long. i wish i could give you advice but i need advice on how to keep a job aswell. :)

What do You think about this list of jobs?
http://www.aspennj.org/TempleGrandinArticle.html

ffanken



Xuincherguixe
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08 Aug 2006, 2:40 am

*Deleted by moi*



Last edited by Xuincherguixe on 08 Aug 2006, 2:42 am, edited 1 time in total.

Xuincherguixe
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08 Aug 2006, 2:41 am

ffanken wrote:
waterdogs wrote:
i've only had a couple of jobs in my life, and didn't have them for very long. i wish i could give you advice but i need advice on how to keep a job aswell. :)

What do You think about this list of jobs?
http://www.aspennj.org/TempleGrandinArticle.html

ffanken

I liked it. I have two criticisms though

The first, exposure to violent images in video game design. Not only does it depend what kind of game we're talking about, but what does violent imagery have to do with anything? It is a pretty crowded position though. Not only that, this is Temple Grandin we're talking about! The woman who's famous for designing slaughterhouses!

The second, web design is also flooded. I think it was even back in 1999 when the article was written.


It never said that we can't, but I still feel I should say. I think that we can do basically any job the NTs can, but in many (most) cases, it requires a tremendous amount of work. So keep your mind open.


My personal advice would be to strive for what you love, but keep your mind open. Try to learn skills that can be applied in many situations. Computer Systems Technology was a great program for me (it's likely very specific to the college I went to, if not in name than I'm almost certain in content), especially the programming aspects. I learned how to do all kinds of things I had never even thought of (Including a lot of stuff they didn't really teach).

Art I think is another example of something with many broad applications, and is likely useful for day to day tasks as well. Much the same as Computers. It is very difficult to be a succesful artist though. Webcomics have become a career for many, but getting that kind of success is probably pretty hard.