Rethinking Friendship

Post Reply New Topic

Lately, I've been rethinking my understanding of friendship - that is, what it entails. Until now I have accepted that making new friends is a happy occasion because we gain someone new to share our life with, and losing them is sad because we will never have that person and their contributions back in our life. But now, I think it's more the other way around - making a new friend is a sad occasion because with it must come the acceptance that one day (maybe sooner, maybe later) you will lose them. Effectively you're dangling a treat in front of yourself, knowing full well that it will be snatched away again. On the other hand, losing a friend is a happy occasion - much as one can appreciate a friend when with them, it is only after losing them that you can really understand what they gave to your life. Losing a friend, while potentially sad, is a unique chance to reflect on the wonderful times you had with them.
A similar arrangement to T. H. White's Merlyn, but for different reasons.

If you approach the subject like this, then a birth is also sad, because one knows that the new life will eventually end.

I try to enjoy the moment, and don't think too much about the future.

I wouldn't say it's the knowledge that the life will end, rather that the day will come when you are no longer a part of it (potentially due to death of course, but there are plenty of other possible reasons).
I guess the thing is that although death is the end, there are plenty of other (lesser) ends that the things you hold dear can come to.

which is a good reason to not hold specific things/persons dear.

Not necessarily. After all, the reflection at the point where it all falls down is a pleasant experience.

violentcloud

will you do this for me?

imagine that you are your friend that died

what do you wish for violentcloud?

Not a lot, I would imagine, being dead and all. But to humor you, I suppose I'd rather not die. But also, I wouldn't want to people who loved me to be sad, because I like seeing them happy.