i agree wholeheartedly with the comments about not finding classically good-looking men that attractive - i think in my case it might be a prejudice about very good-looking people being shallow and one-dimensional, or that it's another way in which i like to go against the grain, or because it's been imposed on me by a society by which i've felt so rejected that i haven't felt it's even expected of me to act according to its norms because i've tried and failed to, because i'm a born misfit, so the label is so ingrained now that it shapes how i perceive things and act most of the time.
what i find to be the most attractive attributes in a man are animation in his face and body language, a penetrating gaze (a bit of a cliche maybe but i like it), a strong and distinctive voice, dark hair, a slim physique, being reasonably tall. in terms of non-physical attributes, he also has to be intelligent and educated, and extroversion and warmth are very desirable too. i suppose in many ways, the type of guy i just outlined is the antithesis of myself in that i'm quite reserved, not that self-assured (although i only make my insecurities known to those closest to me because i hate to appear needy) and so i need someone who will nurture me.
but rather than wanting to displace my ego into someone else, there;s always this part of me that's weirdly envious of the object of my affections because they're everything i've always wanted to be. this proably wasn't the best topic to post this rambling in but does anyone else know what i mean by that?