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morning_after
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26 Mar 2008, 12:32 am

(for those of you that can't pick it up, this is a spoof thread).

Chances that your child will be a professional athlete, 1 in 1,000,000

Chances that your child will become an astronot, 1 in 1,000

Chances that your child will develop normalcy, 149 in 150.

If your child babbles and won't shut up by the age of two, and talks and won't shut up by the age of three, you need to take your child and have them tested to make sure they're not normal.

Nuerotypicalism is a big problem for families all over the country, as they struggle to bring up children that have to have tons of friends around them to feel happy. Imagine having to hear your child tell you they love you to know that it's TRUE!! Or having to deal with many facial expessions that don't make sense.

We here at Nuerotypicalism Speaks envision a future where normal is a word that only appears in the history books so that no family will have to deal with it.

Look at these staggering statistics

*more children are alive today that are normal than dead

*more children are diagnosed with normalcy than die of AIDS, leprosy, and the black plague combined EVERY YEAR.

*more children live with normalcy every year than die in car accidents

*and the numbers are getting worse

We here at Nuerotypicalism Speaks are conducting research into genetics. Hopefully, we will have a prenatal test to determine if a child will be born with normalcy within the next five years. Currently, we have picked out two genes to test for normalcy, so that no more people will have to raise normal children and find themselves tempted to drive them off a nearby bridge.

More signs to look for that your child might be normal

*your child feels self-conscious around you because you move in strange ways/ cannot make sense of stimming

*your child likes crowds, getting depressed whenever he's not surrounded by one

*your child has a lot of interests, but thinks your wierd because yours are so intense

*your child is painfully boring, being unable to imagine new ways of doing an activity

No child should ever have to suffer with normalcy. We here at Nuerotypicalism Speaks encourage you to help us find a cure and erraticate normalcy so that those that are normal will be seen as uncooperative freaks

*embarrassed* Er, um, we mean so that no child will ever have to live with normalcy and if need be they can all be aborted.

(ok, this is a spoof, but the organization is so serious and in some cases inconsiderate that they need to be spoofed sometimes)



SierraBell
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26 Mar 2008, 1:03 am

XD

I first I was thinking "What the Heck?" when you were talking about signs that "Your child may be normal" O.o

But I see it was just a spoof :P

However, I keep seeing threads on Wrong Planet that are all anti-NT and that jazz, but what is Nuerotypicalism? Is it basically the same thing as being called "normal"?



DeaconBlues
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26 Mar 2008, 1:06 am

You forgot to link to their website, the Institute for the Study of the Neurologically Typical.

:)


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TheBladeRoden
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26 Mar 2008, 1:11 am

over 90% of childen receive immunization vaccinations.

over 90% of adults are neurally typical

coincindence????? 8O


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iceb
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26 Mar 2008, 4:27 am

DeaconBlues wrote:
You forgot to link to their website, the Institute for the Study of the Neurologically Typical.

:)


When is someone going to repair the cgi script on the test page :twisted:


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AussieBoy
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26 Mar 2008, 5:26 am

Whoops: logged in as my son. Will re-post under my own name

Helen



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26 Mar 2008, 5:28 am

TheBladeRoden wrote:
over 90% of childen receive immunization vaccinations.

over 90% of adults are neurally typical

coincindence????? 8O



:lol: :lol: :lol:

Helen

P.S. I love this website Neurotypicalism Speaks
P.P.S. AussieBoy is my son



Lateralus
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26 Mar 2008, 7:25 am

DeaconBlues wrote:
You forgot to link to their website, the Institute for the Study of the Neurologically Typical.

:)


The website screening test said i was NT is there much hope for me?



MrMark
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26 Mar 2008, 7:55 am

TheBladeRoden wrote:
over 90% of childen receive immunization vaccinations.

over 90% of adults are neurally typical

coincindence????? 8O


Vaccinations must cause normalcy!


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Chibi_Neko
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26 Mar 2008, 9:05 am

What a shock, Vaccinations... good for you? And I was told that they where evil.

Awesome thread, gotta love spoofs. ^_^


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sartresue
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26 Mar 2008, 4:49 pm

Neur-illogical topic

Cure Neurotypicals Now! :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen: :mrgreen:


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matrix
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26 Mar 2008, 8:36 pm

Our entire three-branch United States system is NT (with the exception of maybe the Supreme Court members, but who listens to them?) , guess we need to stage an alien invasion and get rid of Will Smith and the alcoholic guy that goes "Here's Johnny!"

NTs also need reefer therapy to be back to their weird self again.


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Jainaday
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27 Mar 2008, 2:53 pm

You know, I've always been a little afraid of that. . . honestly.

What if someday I have children who are "normal"? What if they want to be jocks, and cheerleaders, and party all night till they vomit? What if they have no appreciation for Nietzsche, or Shakespeare? What if they think physics dumb?

It's a little disorienting. .


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MrMark
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27 Mar 2008, 3:19 pm

"Neurotypicalism Speaks doesn't speak for me."

It may seem silly to claim to speak for people who can clearly speak for themselves. The problem is that victims of NS can't think for themselves. "Neurotypocalism Thinks" might have been a better name.


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JerryHatake
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27 Mar 2008, 3:43 pm

Doesn't make sense and it isn't attacking Attack Speaks when the last post anti-Autism Speaks was posted it was locked.


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27 Mar 2008, 4:09 pm

Read the latest article in Irked magazine by Lewis Schofield. It's right in keeping with the spirit of this conversation.

http://www.irkedmagazine.com/issue_0000 ... oughts.htm