Do aspies tend to become more neurotypical as they age?

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Do aspies adapt and show more neurotypical behavior as they age and get more life experience? I took the aspie quiz and scored 140/200 based on my current behavior. When I answered as accurately as I could based on what I remember of my childhood behavior, I got 170/200. It says my physical behavior is mostly neurotypical, but for intellectual it's mostly aspie. Perhaps I've got the best of both worlds?

The problem with self reporting is its subjectivity, and people report what they feel. You can learn skills, get degrees, and do interesting things, and this will make you less distressed, but your basic tendencies will remain as they are. People feel their symptoms, but the negative aspects of their symptoms may go away when certain skills are learned the hard way, but that doesn't mean the aspie was necessarily "cured". The necessity to learn, rather than be prewired, is part of what makes the aspie, if I understand correctly, even if the symptoms of distress go away after learning enough skills. NTs may regard aspies as deficient in the same way a wolf might regard an NT baby as deficient for taking so long to mature, but the wolf will never pilot a jet.

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/33550

I can learn eye contact with familiar people, but that doesn't mean I like it with strangers. I am getting a better handle on my field of research so I can speak more smoothly about it in conversation with other experts, but that doesn't mean I won't occasionally get frustrated when nonexperts' eyes glaze over when I discuss something more meaningful than paint color. (Yeah, I'm an elitist. So what?) And I will never be able to pay enough attention to football to match my brother's knowledge of it, or to join him in a meaningful conversation about it with other people.

Last edited by sgrannel on 18 Apr 2008, 10:03 pm, edited 1 time in total.

It's easier to disguise things as I get older but on the flip side I find that I care less about hiding things so I don't attempt as much anymore.

In my case some of AS traits from childhood (such as odd voice tone, "drilling" eye contact, unappropriate manner of smalltalk, weird manner, weak "theory of mind") are almost eliminated now. But I understand, that some part of my mind became more neurotypical too (RDOS shows 98/200).

I still remember those magic words from my parents: "it's obvious", "be simpler" and "behave yourself normally" My mom still not fully understands that it can be not obvious at all.

I know I definitely have. When I was a little kid, I had sensory issues when it came to things like sound. But nowadays, I could really care less. I've also always been very social and outgoing, so that hasn't been a problem for me. Plus I'm having a lot fewer meltdowns than I used to. Still have the obsessions though!

I dont know. i guess people mature and develop but i dont think that people can become Nt. they may get better at certain weaknesses but there still aspie.
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Complicated question!

In some specific ways, I know that I can act more neurotypically. I have memorized etiquette and thus get into fewer faux-pas. It is hard to make myself use names but I do it. One could call all that an act.

On the other hand, I am in my early sixties and can clearly see that I am more aware of how people actually feel. I have gone through a lot of hard experience as well as joyful times. I think this life experience has made me more "empathetic".

I suppose one could ask how I would compare with NT's my same age. On that score, I am definitely as Aspie as ever because those folks, even the ones that I am closest to, are still very mysterious to me.

Because some social skills are learnable, the appearance of normalcy is easier to fake and maintain for longer periods of time. But the essential internal workings of the brain do not change. Meltdowns may occur less frequently, but at 49, I still have them from time to time (I live with an OCD'er, go figure). And no matter how well I may feel that I've learned to fit in, apparently my AS traits betray me anyway. It was my wife's twenty-two yo daughter who recognized the symptoms and emailed her mother an article on AS with the symptom list. For me stimming is nearly constant, unless I'm asleep, and coworkers over several decades asked me (half seriously) "Can't you stop swaying all the time? What are you, Autistic?" And I would reply: "Yeah, I think so...lil bit." So the actual DX was no surprise. In any case, to be perfectly honest, I think we may feel more NT as we get older, simply because we've been forced by life experience to cope. Fit in, or Die, so to speak. But to believe that our actual brain function has somehow mutated by force of will, seems to me a tad delusional, or at least wishful thinking.

More things to have to keep track of as you get older, for me has resulted in less ability to expend any energy (even if I wanted to) on most things that make me look more normal.

I hope I don't, I don't want to become like "them."

I think Willard's hit the nail on the head there. It is possible to learn some social conventions such as maintaining proper eye contact, not monologuing to someone you hardly know about an obscure topic and learning proper greetings, but it's impossible to grow out of your basic AS character.

Our brains have been wired differently from birth, and there's no way they will magically re-wire themselves, even over a period of years. It seems depressing but we can learn a lot of social conventions which might mask our obvious AS traits, at least for some time.

That's a different question to "Do aspies tend to become more neurotypical as they age?"

The answer to the first question is yes, I'd say so. I was diagnosed very young and was by all accounts quite a "weird" kid, but as an adult really most people wouldn't say there was anything especially different about me. Maybe other people with AS would be able to "tell" that I am wired this way, but I imagine most people wouldn't think about it.

The answer to the second question is no, probably not, that is we're not "curing" ourselves.

I guess I've learned to adapt certain things about my behaviour (I used to eat my food in a very specific way, but I've stopped doing that)... but for the most part I'm still prone to babbling about stuff nobody else has an interest in.

Social Fantom Wrote:

"I hope I don't, I don't want to become like 'them.'"

Wow, just about a year ago I had a really awkward interaction by monologuing about my work to someone I just met. It's frustrating because if I say too much, it puts people off but still I feel the need to talk to people. It's an issue of control and the difficulty with using feedback, I think. The control system can't correct itself easily when running in open loop.

Eye contact feels weird, just like knowing where to put the arms and the difficulty with walking posture. As a teenager my dad would tell me that I look hostile when I always have my arms crossed. The problem is not about being unable to do something or because of any muscle problems. The problem is with knowing what posture is communicating and feeling self conscious because I don't know what my arms and eyes are saying, etc. At times I feel like my mannerisms are communicating all kinds of things I don't intend. What I need is a neutral position, but I don't know if this is possible with eye contact.

I used to have an unusual running posture as a teenager. That could have been from sitting in a desk too much as a student, or maybe it was an issue with self consciousness. In recent years I have been running and walking 3-6 miles per day to get in shape and straighten this out. By practicing so much I hope I have burned a neutral walking posture into my motor control, so that if I ever feel overwhelmed by a situation I can revert to my training as a default or "limp-home" mode and get through it without looking weird.

No, Social Fantom should not be worried about becoming like "them", as though that's really such a bad thing. One's good qualities should be easy to keep even if you could press a magic button to make yourself "normal".

Last edited by sgrannel on 19 Apr 2008, 12:36 pm, edited 2 times in total.

No

Right. That's exactly it. There were actually 3 different ways I worded the question, and I did that deliberately. I'm glad to see that you recognized they're not the same.

I'm trying to point out that some aspies may be able to address some of the causes of the distress they may be experiencing without having to change their basic nature, and without having to resort to the false hope of a "cure".

I'm also trying to point out the difference between the reality of how brains are wired and one's own subjective experience of whether this is a problem, and also the difference between one's own internal structure and what is outwardly projected.

Last edited by sgrannel on 18 Apr 2008, 6:32 pm, edited 1 time in total.

What is "Drilling Eye Contact"?? I haven't heard of that one?

thanks..