Finding a shameless girl with creative drive,why so hard?

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I'm still trying to figure this one out. I'm the type of guy who goes to the gym every day, plays raquetball, skates, writes poetry, composes music... and yet I have the damnest time finding a satisfying relationship.

I've been through the whole hook-up thing a few times & it's fun until you realize you want to take a vacation with the person, write a book with them, compose music, learn to salsa dance, etc. & they won't follow through.
My last NT 'girlfriend' & I were 'hooking up' on a regular basis we were shameless & dead honest sexually yet it seems the closer we got to each others hobbies & friends the more expensive time became outside affection until we weren't even really friends everything was on the down-low...sometimes I wonder if I should have settled for the compatimentalized sex life & left it there with eyes wide shut to "keep it safe"???

I wonder how many others have experienced this kind of dillemma... Or, gasp, if there are any girls out there on here who think the same way, need a fun energetic sex life as a foundation but want a creative outlet on top somewhere else to enjoy the energy. Any ideas?

That's odd - I find those types of girls all the time, and I'm not even necessarily looking for them. In fact, they often have too much of a creative drive for me to handle.

Maybe you're looking in the wrong places?

Consider yourself lucky that you've met a woman you find likeable at least to some extent and who likes you (or at least lusts for you, which is better than nothing).

Lust comes easily. Love comes hard.

That either of them is mutually occuring (as in both girl and I have the same feelings) is rare.

Now hold on guys......don't think that every girl is like that. I am not. Having more of a sexual foundation and then off having fun...no thanks.

I like having the foundation of a relationship being made of such things as: talking and joking, dancing, writing stories, just enjoying each other, doing sports, just doing things together.... That is first and for most important to me.

Being sexually and physically close is second for me.....but hey I am an Aspie.

Just keep looking, don't generalise and put girls into a stereotype, otherwise unconsiously that is all you will find becasue you don't think anything else exsists.

Trust me, their are girls out there that think differenly, I am one.

No, it is hard. Most are up tight about their sexuality and don't know how to have fun. The few that are, are already taken. Or you find one who is not up tight, but then cheats on you (yes i am disenfranchised with the opposite sex at the moment).

I almost exclusively dated friends, that is the foundation I go off of. I need to know that the person I am seeing knows how I am and is someone I can be open with. The idea of sex as a basis has no appeal to me; I have had too many guys approach me in that manner and I have to admit I am fairly hostile toward them. I don't like getting hit on, and I especially don't like being treated like someones alternative to masturbation. (I don't have any problem with the relationship having a great sexual energy, but that isn't the basis.)