Which eye are you supposed to look at?

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2ukenkerl
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14 May 2008, 5:21 am

Brittany2907 wrote:
I didn't know you were supposed to look at a specific eye. :?


SAME HERE!



slowmutant
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14 May 2008, 5:42 am

Although you have two eyes, you've only one possible point of focus ay any given time. This is because, unlike chameleon lizards, human eyes must work in unison at all times. Much as we'd like them to, our eyes can't move indepedantly of each other.



_BRI_
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14 May 2008, 8:45 am

Slappy wrote:
Sorry if this has been covered before, but whenever I make eye contact I don't know which eye to look at. Do I pick one eye and look at that, alternate eyes (and if so how often? Once a second?), or look at some vague spot in the middle?! Other people seem to do it so naturally!

Again, sorry if this has been done to death before, but I'm new (first post!)


scan their face from the lips up... do not look at their lips because it's a sign of sexual interest
if you are changing thoughts on a one on one basis then spare 70% percent of time looking at them and drift away ocasionally... stay relaxed... it is not that hard.. just pretend to be nice :)
take care



CentralFLM
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14 May 2008, 8:57 am

The sad fact that we have to THINK about this is what our problem is in the first place. NT people don't even have to think about it because they have great executive functioning. While we are trying hard to figure out which eye to look at, they (NT people) are reading 20 other social cues, movements, tone of voice, etc. at the same time that we don't pick up.



Justthatgirl11
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14 May 2008, 8:59 am

_BRI_ wrote:
Slappy wrote:
Sorry if this has been covered before, but whenever I make eye contact I don't know which eye to look at. Do I pick one eye and look at that, alternate eyes (and if so how often? Once a second?), or look at some vague spot in the middle?! Other people seem to do it so naturally!

Again, sorry if this has been done to death before, but I'm new (first post!)


scan their face from the lips up... do not look at their lips because it's a sign of sexual interest
if you are changing thoughts on a one on one basis then spare 70% percent of time looking at them and drift away ocasionally... stay relaxed... it is not that hard.. just pretend to be nice :)
take care


Don't look at their lips?! OMG! I can't hear them if I'm not looking at the mouth at some point! Crap.


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_BRI_
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14 May 2008, 9:16 am

Justthatgirl11 wrote:
Don't look at their lips?! OMG! I can't hear them if I'm not looking at the mouth at some point! Crap.


If you do that often it is considered a sexual insinuation.

I have problems screening background noises too, If that was the concern...



Justthatgirl11
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14 May 2008, 10:43 am

_BRI_ wrote:
Justthatgirl11 wrote:
Don't look at their lips?! OMG! I can't hear them if I'm not looking at the mouth at some point! Crap.


If you do that often it is considered a sexual insinuation.

I have problems screening background noises too, If that was the concern...


I had no idea. 8O

And yes, filtering out background noise is a struggle sometimes. I get very distracted. My poor kids have to repeat themselves a million times if the tv is on, the computer is on, someone else is playing a video game, etc. :roll:


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AnonymousAnonymous
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14 May 2008, 3:18 pm

I can make eye contact just fine,
except when talking to some people.


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14 May 2008, 3:44 pm

It is impossible to look at both eyes at once. 8O

I find it easy when someone talks to me and very difficult when I speak to someone directly.


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silkboy
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14 May 2008, 3:49 pm

I find myself switching off between the two eyes. I think I end up staring. I try hard to appear "normal" and maintain eye-contact but I think it probably ends up looking odd.



SotiCoto
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14 May 2008, 3:51 pm

I can focus on the area containing both of their eyes with little difficulty. I just consider them one unit... and stare at it.... rather than considering them separate.

That is if I feel like making eye contact at all. I usually don't bother unless I want to intimidate them.



craola
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14 May 2008, 4:04 pm

I focus on above middle of eyes if im confident but generally peoples mouths.

I don't believe the sexual interest thing...I don't really know what that means to be honest, but most people can't tell you're not looking at they're eyes it seems. Worst comes the worst I'll say im learning to lip read.



SotiCoto
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14 May 2008, 4:21 pm

craola wrote:
I focus on above middle of eyes if im confident but generally peoples mouths.

I don't believe the sexual interest thing...I don't really know what that means to be honest, but most people can't tell you're not looking at they're eyes it seems. Worst comes the worst I'll say im learning to lip read.

Sexual interest thing?

... Anyone who can figure that out from someone conclusively just by watching their face for a while, I would say is a far better reader of reactions than myself... and I suppose I would have to congratulate them on it.

But likewise, I tend to think of it as impossible... practically speaking. If someone has an opinion of me, either they express it verbally or they don't... simple as that. If they don't express it then there is no point assuming it might be so.