ways of coping with your depression and building self esteem

Page 22 of 23 [ 356 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 19, 20, 21, 22, 23  Next

blooiejagwa
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 19 Dec 2017
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,793

17 Apr 2020, 5:28 pm

DoniiMann wrote:
Two big causes of depression are feelings of helplessness/lack of control and isolation. They're probably both tied to hundreds of thousands of years of evolution wherein being cut off from your tribe or circumstances being beyond your control would both result in death. Now such things are unlikely to result in death, but we get that uneasy feeling (aka depression).

I suspect engaging in clubs that tackled both those issues would be appropriate. Maybe a martial arts club or a fix-it/makers club would help.


This has been my situation since I was engaged till now (after divorce).
Before that the isolation and helplessness was due to ASD symptoms and the relatively well-meaning stuff with family

I am unfortunate to be dealing with someone who enjoys playing power games, bound to it, and the only peaceful way to deal is to accept everything and sink even deeper into the mire. Further, the kids' situations particularly the elder is out of anyone's control in many aspects.

No control


_________________
Take defeat as an urge to greater effort.
-Napoleon Hill


DoniiMann
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 2 Sep 2010
Age: 56
Gender: Male
Posts: 477
Location: Tasmania

18 Apr 2020, 7:54 am

blooiejagwa wrote:
This has been my situation since I was engaged till now (after divorce).
Before that the isolation and helplessness was due to ASD symptoms and the relatively well-meaning stuff with family

I am unfortunate to be dealing with someone who enjoys playing power games, bound to it, and the only peaceful way to deal is to accept everything and sink even deeper into the mire. Further, the kids' situations particularly the elder is out of anyone's control in many aspects.

No control


Personal control (aka personal power) is a tough one. I still haven't gotten the hang of it. But I think from my reading that a lot of it has to do with self worth and not being a people pleaser. To that end I recently purchased an Udemy course about not being a people pleaser. Looking forward to getting the time to do the course.


_________________
assumption makes an 'ass' out of 'u' and 'mption'.


blooiejagwa
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 19 Dec 2017
Age: 33
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,793

19 Apr 2020, 9:42 pm

it's funny how depression has a way of eating up a majority of free time (for me at least) by convincing you there's no point in attempting a course or studying or bettering yourself and taking every setback as proof.


_________________
Take defeat as an urge to greater effort.
-Napoleon Hill


auntblabby
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 113,605
Location: the island of defective toy santas

19 Apr 2020, 11:30 pm

i guess i'm lucky that i have an internal drill sergeant [albeit one who is loving and gentle] who motivates me to get up off my tuchas and do stuff that is necessary for my well-being. if i had not been in the army, i might not have been able to learn that.



Sylkat
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Sep 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 17,425

17 Aug 2020, 8:27 pm

I have lived alone most of my life and have not experienced painful loneliness until recently.
Due partly to the Coronavirus shutdown, I have little opportunity to even say ‘Hi!’ and chat briefly with anyone.
I just accepted my alone-ness for so long, but now I feel it acutely, and it hurts!


_________________
Sylkat
Student Body President, Miskatonic University


Oh_no_its_Ferris
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Aug 2020
Age: 52
Gender: Male
Posts: 728

17 Aug 2020, 9:17 pm

Sylkat wrote:
I have lived alone most of my life and have not experienced painful loneliness until recently.
Due partly to the Coronavirus shutdown, I have little opportunity to even say ‘Hi!’ and chat briefly with anyone.
I just accepted my alone-ness for so long, but now I feel it acutely, and it hurts!


But you are the master of everything , I found your certificate from over a year ago

Image


_________________
Release me from moral assumption
Total rejection total destruction


auntblabby
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 113,605
Location: the island of defective toy santas

17 Aug 2020, 9:21 pm

^^^excellent :star: :star: :star: :star:



Teach51
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Jan 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,808
Location: Where angels do not fear to tread.

18 Aug 2020, 4:52 am

auntblabby wrote:
^^^excellent :star: :star: :star: :star:


Most excellent indeed.


_________________
My best will just have to be good enough.


questor
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 23 Apr 2011
Age: 63
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,696
Location: Twilight Zone

02 Oct 2020, 8:16 am

Self esteem comes from inside yourself, based on what you do with your life. No one else can give this to you.

As for depression, get plenty of rest, eat healthier, get some exercise, engage in activities of interest to you, and take B complex vitamines, as they are mood boosting. I found out by accident that I had a B vitamine deficiency when I started taking them, and accidentally cured my lifelong depression. Now if I can only find other safe things I can take to accidentally cure my other health issues. :lol:


_________________
If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drummer.
Let him step to the music which he hears, however measured, or far away.--Henry David Thoreau


blitzkrieg
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 8 Jun 2011
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 14,465
Location: United Kingdom

22 Oct 2020, 11:59 pm

I've been bullied, misinterpreted, and generally just been treated badly. I have received nothing in the way of an apology. Quite the opposite, really.



Star88
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

Joined: 15 Nov 2020
Posts: 8

15 Nov 2020, 3:47 pm

Struggling at the moment. I always do in winter, but lockdown is making it harder. I am trying to eat as well as possible, see people on zoom exercise etc, work towards goals. But everything feels like swimming through treacle with no guarantee of getting to the finish line.

I am just exhausted, low, and feel there is no pleasure in life.



Jakki
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Sep 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 10,120
Location: Outter Quadrant

15 Nov 2020, 3:55 pm

Star88 wrote:
Struggling at the moment. I always do in winter, but lockdown is making it harder. I am trying to eat as well as possible, see people on zoom exercise etc, work towards goals. But everything feels like swimming through treacle with no guarantee of getting to the finish line.

I am just exhausted, low, and feel there is no pleasure in life.


Winter months can be very hard on most people , low pressure fronts come in , less opportunities to get out and about . Covid making this situation No Better ..... winter won’t last forever neither will this covid thing .
Hang in there as best as you can ..... in these tough times .


_________________
Diagnosed hfa
Loves velcro,
Quote:
where ever you go ,there you are


auntblabby
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 113,605
Location: the island of defective toy santas

15 Nov 2020, 8:31 pm

Star88 wrote:
Struggling at the moment. I always do in winter, but lockdown is making it harder. I am trying to eat as well as possible, see people on zoom exercise etc, work towards goals. But everything feels like swimming through treacle with no guarantee of getting to the finish line. I am just exhausted, low, and feel there is no pleasure in life.

at least you are in good company here :alien: :alien: :alien:



kdm1984
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 31 May 2012
Gender: Female
Posts: 443
Location: SW MO, USA

05 Dec 2020, 6:36 pm

I cope by spending real, in-person time with husband. These Internet forums can only offer so much, and some are outright hostile, as my sig evidences.


_________________
36 yr old female; dx age 29. Level 2 Aspie.


Butterfly88
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 22 Jul 2015
Gender: Female
Posts: 19,857
Location: United States

20 Jan 2021, 12:40 pm

kdm1984 wrote:
I cope by spending real, in-person time with husband. These Internet forums can only offer so much, and some are outright hostile, as my sig evidences.

I agree in-person is better but it’s not always doable. Myself for example, I live with my parents but they can only offer me so much support before burning out. I don’t have any friends in my community unfortunately so I often turn to the internet. I suspect some others here are in similar situations.



Jakki
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Sep 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 10,120
Location: Outter Quadrant

20 Jan 2021, 12:47 pm

Understand. Friends on the net ,, but less the parents , and few in the community . :nerdy:


_________________
Diagnosed hfa
Loves velcro,
Quote:
where ever you go ,there you are