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Eggman
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12 Aug 2008, 2:53 am

Anyone here have issues with co-workers who decide because they occasionly see you they want to "know" you. I typically find that I work best with people when all we know about each other is hwat we need to get the job done. So it boggles me when they then try to "get" me. Sometimes its ok, but other times some of them seem to be really trying to get into my life though I hardly know them, specially when we only interact for 5 minues a day or its a one time event us meeting each other.



willem
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12 Aug 2008, 3:42 am

Eggman wrote:
Anyone here have issues with co-workers who decide because they occasionly see you they want to "know" you. I typically find that I work best with people when all we know about each other is hwat we need to get the job done. So it boggles me when they then try to "get" me. Sometimes its ok, but other times some of them seem to be really trying to get into my life though I hardly know them, specially when we only interact for 5 minues a day or its a one time event us meeting each other.


The person-orientedness of NT's can be really irritating, yes. You should not respond to such inquiries about your private life. It's better to talk about a subject that interests you, preferably a very complex subject. In some cases they'll actually find the subject of your choice interesting too, and you may find yourself enjoying the contact and perhaps making a friend. In most cases they will no longer know how to respond to you, because you'e not talking about your person, their person or some other person, and they'll leave you alone.


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Stereokid
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12 Aug 2008, 9:47 am

I don't think that will bother me much. In fact, it bothers me even more when people don't try to get to know me enough, or instead decide to bully me.



Oggleleus
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12 Aug 2008, 10:38 am

Yeah, it bothers me also but it usually depends on the person and the questions and the job itself. Sometimes, people are too nosey for my tastes. But, sometimes people are asking those kinds of questions for someone else that might be interested or they are trying to pass the time. All in all, I still have not figured this stuff out and quit trying. I work in an office setting and I do not discuss my private life very much at all. When I worked at a restaurant, however, a more social kind of envrionment, I did discuss my private life a little more. So, for me it depends on the job itself and the people. Maybe it is that I do not care for gossip that much and I like to be a bit of a mystery instead of being front page news.



CelticRose
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12 Aug 2008, 8:08 pm

I just answer the question as briefly as possible without giving away too much detail and then change the subject. If the question's too personal or offensive I say so. If I'd just rather not anwer at all, I say that. You don't have to answer every question that someone asks you simply because they ask. You have a right to your privacy; nice people will respect that.


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12 Aug 2008, 11:06 pm

Maybe I'm a little different (in that I'm a shy socially dysfunctional extrovert) than a lot of people here, but I really wish that my workplace had a better social environment. It's a small office of only 8 people (of which, only 3 are approachable at all). I share an office with one of the approachable people (he's my supervisor), and we in addition to the actual work, we talk about boring things like the weather and stocks, but never anything more interesting, deep, or related to my interests (but I do have some interest in stocks).

I share some interests (like anime) with one of the others, but I rarely have any work reason to talk to him, I feel like I'm wasting company time to go talk to him about hobby related things, and I've been turned down to meet for lunch every time I've asked (beyond shortly after when I joined the company). It's gotten to the point where I just don't bother.

The last guy often drops by to just chat with my supervisor, but they usually talk in Chinese, effectively barring me from joining in any conversation.

Since I haven't managed to find friends outside of work, is it too much to ask to have friends at work? Apparently so.



Eggman
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18 Aug 2008, 8:28 pm

This one guy I saw 5minutes a day..tops, who seemed to have made Jabba the Hutt A gentleman by comparison, was trying to learn my Wow charcter and relm info so we could have some extended interaction.



Katou
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18 Aug 2008, 8:59 pm

I usually separated my personal life from my work life. If by chance a conversation opens on something I can converse with, then, I will join in.


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darkwhispersdale
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30 Aug 2008, 3:01 pm

I have managed to make friends in work (with the men at least the women are hard work and want to know the ins-and-outs of my life) I've found I have alot of interests and hobbies in common with some of them and the production boys invited me into their tribe on the tribalwars game so I talk to them outside of work as well.



ScottF
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04 Sep 2008, 1:45 pm

My immediate supervisor, Todd is pretty cool, he and I have similar interests and he is good with computers so sometimes I ask him for advice on how to maintain mine.


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