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JohnHopkins
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19 Aug 2008, 3:02 pm

Right, see this woman is an example of a lack of respect, old chum.

kc8ufv wrote:
What should I do? How can I get over this?


There is no magic cures. Do the things that make you feel good, but don't be afraid to get emotional about this to somebody and let it out. And don't go crawling back to her, it sounds like she was only ever after onet hing.

kc8ufv wrote:
Is this why I've avoided relationships for so long?


If everyone gave up after one failed relationship the human race would be decreasing by the day.

kc8ufv wrote:
I've only really had one other semi-long term relationship, in it, we started having sex way too early, and it ended up being the only the only thing we had in common. I wanted this relationship to last, so I didn't want to make the same mistake.


Did you actually tell her this?

Haliphron wrote:
So f***ing TYPICAL of a girl to breakup using txtmsgs.........


High-five for painting a whole gender with one brush.



LePetitPrince
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19 Aug 2008, 3:03 pm

You should had sex with her or at least telling her that you would like to , she probably thought that you are not physically attracted to her and this is very damaging to any relationship , instead you wanted to play the 'clean and decent guy'.

Enjoy the 'clean and decent guy' status now.



Diamond_Head
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19 Aug 2008, 4:20 pm

Quote:
"u, me, ovr"
"wut u btch"
"u r dum"
"i nvr <3 u bich"
"by 4ever"
"lol i chtd on u"
"WTF U ASS"


ROFL



Gamester
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19 Aug 2008, 5:09 pm

JohnHopkins wrote:
Right, see this woman is an example of a lack of respect, old chum.

kc8ufv wrote:
What should I do? How can I get over this?


There is no magic cures. Do the things that make you feel good, but don't be afraid to get emotional about this to somebody and let it out. And don't go crawling back to her, it sounds like she was only ever after onet hing.

kc8ufv wrote:
Is this why I've avoided relationships for so long?


If everyone gave up after one failed relationship the human race would be decreasing by the day.


kc8ufv wrote:
I've only really had one other semi-long term relationship, in it, we started having sex way too early, and it ended up being the only the only thing we had in common. I wanted this relationship to last, so I didn't want to make the same mistake.


Did you actually tell her this?

Haliphron wrote:
So f***ing TYPICAL of a girl to breakup using txtmsgs.........


High-five for painting a whole gender with one brush.


what can anyone do, after something like this? Get back on your bike and keep on riding. A skinned knee isn't gonna stop anyone, but unless they get cowardly about it, then it will. Life keeps coming whether we live or not.

Actually the human race would still be here, because China is still around, and they're the one with the most population (thought some humor could be used.)

Mate, that's the hard thing, Sex is something that should be savored and enjoyed, not put as a decision as to when to have it.

Haliphron......shut up. my first girlfriend did the same thing though it was via IM, and you know what? She and I still friends.


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JohnHopkins
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19 Aug 2008, 5:41 pm

But sex isn't always that simple, especially not with autism involved.

Not telling your partner something like this can lead to the end of a relationship.

In fact, hell, it just did.



Gamester
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19 Aug 2008, 6:24 pm

JohnHopkins wrote:
But sex isn't always that simple, especially not with autism involved.

Not telling your partner something like this can lead to the end of a relationship.

In fact, hell, it just did.


yes..............but anyone with principles would know that isn't wrong.

that if they want to wait, that's what they want to do.

as for me? well.........we don't need to go there.


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ToadOfSteel
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19 Aug 2008, 6:42 pm

Gamester wrote:
Mate, that's the hard thing, Sex is something that should be savored and enjoyed, not put as a decision as to when to have it.


Just bear in mind that the hotter a relationship burns, the faster it dies...



kc8ufv
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19 Aug 2008, 8:26 pm

JohnHopkins wrote:
kc8ufv wrote:
I've only really had one other semi-long term relationship, in it, we started having sex way too early, and it ended up being the only the only thing we had in common. I wanted this relationship to last, so I didn't want to make the same mistake.


Did you actually tell her this?


Actually I did, the first time we were in my car making out (frenching, touching each other's breasts) and she started to reach for my zipper. Kinda stopped the situation cold that night, but at the time, it seemed like she understood. Maybe I need to take the advice she gave me that night "Stop living in the past".
I don't know about her, but I don't need someone to simply f**k with. As far as that bodily function, my hand has served me well all these years.


The strange thing is, she's actually the one who actually drove me to looking into Asperger's. One night, after taking her to a movie, we were in my car talking, and she wondered why I was always so quiet around her, and most people, but I am very talkative around the other commo and logs geeks on our team. Also, when I did talk to her, she knows I'm very intelligent, and that I read a lot, but my word choice seems odd. She wasn't certain what it was, but it made me think back, and about a year earlier one of my co-workers suggested I may have it after her son was diagnosed. She (co-worker) said that she sees a lot of the same traits in me as in her son, and I gave her hope as to how her son will grow up. After getting home that night, I looked up Asperger's online, and started reading. I read until several hours after I should have gone to bed. The next day at work was a slow day, and I found the Aspie quiz. I took it, and after getting the results, combined with all the reading I had done on the topic, I cried tears of understanding all evening. (luckily, my parents weren't home that evening. They have no idea that I think I might be an aspie.) Later, I told her (ex), and she didn't believe it, because I talk with normal rythem and intonation. The strange thing is, all through my life, I've been told one of two things - "speak up, I can't hear you", or "you don't have to talk so loud". I think I finally have got the volume thing under control, for the most part, as I don't hear those comments so much. Without her, I would have never even found this site, as I wouldn't have thought to look. Finding this site has given me so much of a better understanding of myself, that you wouldn't believe it.



Betterclassed
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20 Aug 2008, 6:49 am

kc8ufv wrote:
JohnHopkins wrote:
kc8ufv wrote:
I've only really had one other semi-long term relationship, in it, we started having sex way too early, and it ended up being the only the only thing we had in common. I wanted this relationship to last, so I didn't want to make the same mistake.


Did you actually tell her this?


Actually I did, the first time we were in my car making out (frenching, touching each other's breasts) and she started to reach for my zipper. Kinda stopped the situation cold that night, but at the time, it seemed like she understood. Maybe I need to take the advice she gave me that night "Stop living in the past".
I don't know about her, but I don't need someone to simply f**k with. As far as that bodily function, my hand has served me well all these years.


The strange thing is, she's actually the one who actually drove me to looking into Asperger's. One night, after taking her to a movie, we were in my car talking, and she wondered why I was always so quiet around her, and most people, but I am very talkative around the other commo and logs geeks on our team. Also, when I did talk to her, she knows I'm very intelligent, and that I read a lot, but my word choice seems odd. She wasn't certain what it was, but it made me think back, and about a year earlier one of my co-workers suggested I may have it after her son was diagnosed. She (co-worker) said that she sees a lot of the same traits in me as in her son, and I gave her hope as to how her son will grow up. After getting home that night, I looked up Asperger's online, and started reading. I read until several hours after I should have gone to bed. The next day at work was a slow day, and I found the Aspie quiz. I took it, and after getting the results, combined with all the reading I had done on the topic, I cried tears of understanding all evening. (luckily, my parents weren't home that evening. They have no idea that I think I might be an aspie.) Later, I told her (ex), and she didn't believe it, because I talk with normal rythem and intonation. The strange thing is, all through my life, I've been told one of two things - "speak up, I can't hear you", or "you don't have to talk so loud". I think I finally have got the volume thing under control, for the most part, as I don't hear those comments so much. Without her, I would have never even found this site, as I wouldn't have thought to look. Finding this site has given me so much of a better understanding of myself, that you wouldn't believe it.


Hmmmmm, have you seen a doctor about this? They're a lot of things you may not be aware of and may even more towards high functioning than an aspie. I recommend seeing a doctor to be sure of this.



PrincessSwan
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20 Aug 2008, 10:53 am

Man, that girl just sounds weird.
I've read so many posts about people who have been dumped or just apparently 'forgotten' by the other person and I am like wtf? At least have the decency to let the other person know that the relationship is going down like a bacon butty at a Bar Mitzvah fgs.

*sigh*

HRH Swan



michel
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20 Aug 2008, 12:11 pm

Well if she dumped you by texting you, that's lame. You don't want a girl like that anyway.

However, it would be humiliating for a girl to have a guy refuse her sexual advances, surely you can understand that. Hell hath no furry like a woman scorned.

How hard could it have been to at least let her feel up your package and copped a few good chubby squeezes whenever she felt like it? Alright, I'm half kidding, but you know, women do have needs, just like us.

Anyway, just remember that time heals all, try and focus on other things, it'll be OK in time... :wink:



kc8ufv
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20 Aug 2008, 2:00 pm

Betterclassed wrote:
Hmmmmm, have you seen a doctor about this? They're a lot of things you may not be aware of and may even more towards high functioning than an aspie. I recommend seeing a doctor to be sure of this.


No, but what benefit would there be to seeing a doctor at my age? I'm not young enough that I'm still in school, able to get other services from them...



Betterclassed
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20 Aug 2008, 9:57 pm

kc8ufv wrote:
Betterclassed wrote:
Hmmmmm, have you seen a doctor about this? They're a lot of things you may not be aware of and may even more towards high functioning than an aspie. I recommend seeing a doctor to be sure of this.


No, but what benefit would there be to seeing a doctor at my age? I'm not young enough that I'm still in school, able to get other services from them...


Being certain is far better and you're not exactly old, 26 is still worth seen a doctor about this. You still have most of life ahead of you. Be certain before you take that first step into the world of Aspie.



kc8ufv
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21 Aug 2008, 6:39 am

Betterclassed wrote:
kc8ufv wrote:
Betterclassed wrote:
Hmmmmm, have you seen a doctor about this? They're a lot of things you may not be aware of and may even more towards high functioning than an aspie. I recommend seeing a doctor to be sure of this.


No, but what benefit would there be to seeing a doctor at my age? I'm not young enough that I'm still in school, able to get other services from them...


Being certain is far better and you're not exactly old, 26 is still worth seen a doctor about this. You still have most of life ahead of you. Be certain before you take that first step into the world of Aspie.


I still see no benefit at this point to an official diagnosis for me. From what I have read, the only thing it would do for me is give ADA accomodation, yet, when informing an employer of this, according to things I have even read on this forum, it causes more problems than it solves, as it will trigger (even if only subconciously) the employer to look for reasons to get rid of me/not hire me.



Betterclassed
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21 Aug 2008, 8:12 pm

kc8ufv wrote:
Betterclassed wrote:
kc8ufv wrote:
Betterclassed wrote:
Hmmmmm, have you seen a doctor about this? They're a lot of things you may not be aware of and may even more towards high functioning than an aspie. I recommend seeing a doctor to be sure of this.


No, but what benefit would there be to seeing a doctor at my age? I'm not young enough that I'm still in school, able to get other services from them...


Being certain is far better and you're not exactly old, 26 is still worth seen a doctor about this. You still have most of life ahead of you. Be certain before you take that first step into the world of Aspie.


I still see no benefit at this point to an official diagnosis for me. From what I have read, the only thing it would do for me is give ADA accomodation, yet, when informing an employer of this, according to things I have even read on this forum, it causes more problems than it solves, as it will trigger (even if only subconciously) the employer to look for reasons to get rid of me/not hire me.


Why tell them, if you are so worried about it.