'egocentric 'or 'the world revolves around you'
My friends tell me that all the time and I've only just realized that it's true. After years of me saying things like "I don't get it" or "Why would he do THAT" or "This is boring" and having people say "That's because it's not about you", I finally figured out that the only things I'm interested in are things that relate to me in some way. Either about me, about an interest of mine, or about something I can immediately relate to. If it's a situation that I would never be in, it just doesn't make sense to me because I can't relate it to myself. My manager has taken to saying "You have to stop thinking like Darcy and then you'll get it" (I'm Darcy). At any rate, I still don't get it.
I just can't relate or empathize with anything that hasn't happened to me or I haven't experienced directly. I can't "put myself in someone else's shoes", as they say. But I can wear my boyfriend's shoes because we have the same shoe size.
On a similar note, does anyone else have an incredibly difficult time with the idea that people's lives keep happening after you've left the room? I understand the concept just fine, of course people don't just freeze and wait for me to come back. I know this because they all tell me about things that they've done that I haven't been there for. But I have the hardest time actually accepting that when I leave a room, everyone who was there doesn't just disappear until I see them again. Logically, I get it. Realistically, I can't get my brain to accept it. It's very strange, and no one I've ever met has had that same problem.
You're not alone. I never got the concept that things could happen when I wasn't there.
Its why at 12, I pestered my parents divorce proceedings out of Mums lawyer and the judge.
_________________
Every time you think you've made it idiot proof, someone comes along and invents a better idiot.
?the end of our exploring, will be to arrive where we started, and know the place for the first time. - T.S. Eliot
I think this is very comon in AS. We tend to spend oaa our time bottled up inside ourselves, because we don't understand the world and people around us.
Everybody is egocentric, by definition. NTs have a set of signals they use to appear as if they are outgoing, accepting and not egocentric, but the fact is that nobody can leave his brain and reside in another's. AS don't have that set of signals, so we are more obvious in or egocentricity.
Pops
_________________
Tools are dangerous only while being controlled by a human.
It's just researchers misunderstanding that Aspies function differently, i.e. they follow what they are interested in and what is relevant and rational to them, they think entirely differently.
Much of what is published on AS is incorrect and a total generalization
The mind-blindness (referring to others' minds) that is Asperger's is a blindness to many things outside of the subject's mind (not just what's going on in others' minds - but what's going on more generally).
Asking other people what's happening in a movie is like a blind man asking what's happening onscreen.
It's not unnatural for the subconscious mind to infer that nothing goes on outside his immediate sphere, since out of sight is out of mind.
And it's a weird thing when you discover that someone you spend a lot of time with, did something like going to another country over the weekend - since they look exactly the same after the weekend as they did before it.
The realisation that the world does not revolve around me is odd.
To think that every person I see on the streets or cannot see right now is also having a mind full of thoughts and ideas and that everybody I interact with has such and relationships of all kinds to various people is so huge it does not quite seem to fit into my mind.
I know it, but to really grasp it, feel it on more than the mere level of factual knowledge... well, I'm not there yet. I don#t particularly want to either. It makes me feel so small, insignificant and lost is the biggest chaos of what are other people and their desires and visions.
I share, I ask others, I try to think of others but frankly I don't feel any for it. It confuses me too much.
I try hard to do all that, but it doesn't ring as any important. It's just me there, but nobody really else seems to be around.
_________________
Autism + ADHD
______
The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it. Terry Pratchett
I agree that we aren't any more egocentric than anyone else we just don't bother to fake it.
After all if something isn't relevant to you or your life that makes it by definition irrelevant, right?
Why should I care about things that are irrelevant?
_________________
One pill makes you larger
And one pill makes you small
And the ones that mother gives you
Don't do anything at all
-----------
"White Rabbit" - Jefferson Airplane
I’ve been accused of being egocentric a lot from my parents. I sometimes felt like they misinterpreted me though.
Egocentric can imply arrogance, i.e. someone thinks they deserve to be the center of attention. That’s not the case with me most of the time. I’m just not as instinctually aware of others. I tend to focus emotionally inward and outwardly I merely observe and analyze my surroundings. I don’t naturally focus on other people unless there’s a strong impetus to do so.
It’s like there’s a switch that has to be triggered for me to experience empathy. Overall I get along better with people who wear their heart on their sleeve than with people who expect niceties. I can be compassionate towards people who are open and honest. I have trouble with people who don’t voice their concerns but simply expect me to act a certain way.
Not really, most of my friends tell me the complete opposite really. But sometimes i appear that way when wrapped up in my obsessions (although i have learned how to drop those when its needed sometimes people can tell im stressed about having to drop it, but it doesn't normally last long), or on a bad day when i find it hard to communicate.
Similar Topics | |
---|---|
Hello, World! |
Today, 8:29 am |
Hello, world! |
30 Mar 2024, 8:15 am |
Understanding the world! |
19 Feb 2024, 9:07 am |
I don't know where I belong in this world |
30 Mar 2024, 10:02 am |