The Muffin Man and other crazy conspiracies...

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we all know him...
Do you know the Muffin Man?
The Muffin Man, the Muffin Man.
Do you know the Muffin Man,
Who lives on Drury Lane?

but do we truly know this man and what was he up to exactly on drury lane? making muffins? maybe... he may have been a russian spy who secretly made grenades disguised secretly as muffins and sent them to russia. where's my evidence on this? i have absolutely no clue but it's out there! somewhere...

Other questions:

did he live alone?
did he like other things like pumpkin pie and strudles(maybe an occasional dumpling)?
how did he live?
did he have actual name such as bob, steve, or janool?

also, concerning the olive garden: are they really what they seem? is everybody in that restaurant as happy as they seem? why are they happy?
i believe that the olive garden is some sort of brainwashing mechanism...set up by an underground organization who secretly uses alot of that money from overly happy constumers to illegally manufactor portable dvd players, toothpicks, and rubber ducks. one again, where is my evidence? i have no clue...it's out there...just wait.

anyone want to add in their crazy conspiracy theory?

*all theories accepted except ones detailing a plan blow up alaska.*

hmm...no other crazy people here...where's werbert when you need him...

Did you know, no you didn't, good thing I'm here, don't you think? There has been a war of the Muffins for a long time. It's true. I know these things. There are Good Muffins and there are Evul Muffins. It's gruesome in parts, rather pleasant in others and always informative. Fillings are always interesting to discuss and not the kind in your teeth, if you have any. Personally I am fond of blue berry's and one must always take into consideration the cultural difference, no not of blue berry's although that might be true too, but of the very word Muffin itself.

I want to play, but obsessions have had a melding and are pulling me away at the moment..... I'll be back.

Muffin man

Frank zappa (lead guitar, vocals)
Captain beefheart (harp, vocals)
George duke (keyboards, vocals)
Napoleon murphy brock (saxophone, vocals)
Bruce fowler (trombone)
Tom fowler (bass)
Denny walley (slide guitar, vocals)
Terry bozzio (drums)

The muffin man is seated at the table in the laboratory of the utility muffin
Research kitchen... reaching for an oversized chrome spoon he gathers an
Intimate quantity of dried muffin remnants and brushing his scapular aside
Procceds to dump these inside of his shirt...
He turns to us and speaks:

Some people like cupcakes better. I for one care less for them!

Arrogantly twisting the sterile canvas snoot of a fully charged icing
Anointment utensil he poots forths a quarter-ounce green rosette (oh ah yuk
Yuk... lets try that again...!) he poots forth a quarter-ounce green rosette
Near the summit of a dense but radiant muffin of his own design.
Later he says:

Some people... some people like cupcakes exclusively, while myself, I say
There is naught nor ought there be nothing so exalted on the face of gods grey
Earth as that prince of foods... the muffin!

Girl you thought he was a man
But he was a muffin
He hung around till you found
That he didnt know nuthin

Girl you thought he was a man
But he only was a-puffin
No cries is heard in the night
As a result of him stuffin

Bruce fowler on trombone, napoleon murphy brock on tenor sax, and lead vocals,
Terry bozzio on drums, tom fowler on bass, denny walley on slide, george duke
On keyboards, captain beefheart on vocals, and soprano sax, and madness. thank
You very much for coming to the concert tonight. hope you enjoyed it. goodnight
Austin, texas, where ever you are.

I knew the Muffin Man before he lived on Drury Lane.

Nice guy... until he fell in with the wrong crowd.

Gingy betraying the Muffin Man!
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CFKFeoT7GwQ[/youtube]

Gingy, how could you?!