Do some women like submissive men?

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0_equals_true
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01 Oct 2008, 11:43 am

Fnord wrote:
Does the word "Henpecked" mean anything to anybody?

No?

How about "Pussy-Whipped"?

Some women can not sustain a relationship with a man unless the woman dominates the man.

Which then introduces the term "Dominatrix" to the discussion...

Switching is common in other animals too. Even in dogs a female sometimes will mount a male dog even though she cannot hump him doggy style. Horses for courses. :lol:



LePetitPrince
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01 Oct 2008, 11:54 am

An example of a man with submissive personality:

Each time when he wants to invite his girl to a dinner he would always say : "pick the restaurant you want"


A guy like this will gradually lose respect in the girl's eye.

Women prefer men who sometimes ask something like : "Let's go to restaurant X" or at least "What about restaurant X?".



spudnik
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01 Oct 2008, 11:56 am

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1MoRFsGXiM[/youtube]
Something for the submissive men out there, enjoy :roll:



0_equals_true
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01 Oct 2008, 11:58 am

LePetitPrince wrote:
An example of a man with submissive personality:

Each time when he wants to invite his girl to a dinner he would always say : "pick the restaurant you want"


A guy like this will gradually lose respect in the girl's eye.

Women prefer men who sometimes ask something like : "Let's go to restaurant X" or at least "What about restaurant X?".

you might have a point there. It is egalitarian but not under confident. But i garentee you if you order for her, in nearly every case she will take offence.



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01 Oct 2008, 12:16 pm

Ancient Wisdom: Men love women, Women respect men, and they live happily ever after.
Otherwise ... they DON'T!



Hero
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01 Oct 2008, 3:17 pm

LePetitPrince wrote:
An example of a man with submissive personality:

Each time when he wants to invite his girl to a dinner he would always say : "pick the restaurant you want"


A guy like this will gradually lose respect in the girl's eye.

Women prefer men who sometimes ask something like : "Let's go to restaurant X" or at least "What about restaurant X?".


That first line isn't submissive though. :/

That is indifferent or dismissive.

Submissive would be if the girl brought the point up, asked the question, he didn't have an answer, she chose the restaurant, and then he agreed.



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01 Oct 2008, 3:22 pm

LePetitPrince wrote:
An example of a man with submissive personality:

Each time when he wants to invite his girl to a dinner he would always say : "pick the restaurant you want"


A guy like this will gradually lose respect in the girl's eye.

Women prefer men who sometimes ask something like : "Let's go to restaurant X" or at least "What about restaurant X?".


Again, one example, and you are making a huge assumption and generalization about the attitudes of the female involved. I'd like to know what experience or observation you are making your assertions from, if you would - I'd like to know where you getting this information. Also, do not confuse passive and submissive - they are two different things.


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0_equals_true
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01 Oct 2008, 3:31 pm

Hero wrote:
That first line isn't submissive though. :/

That is indifferent or dismissive.

Submissive would be if the girl brought the point up, asked the question, he didn't have an answer, she chose the restaurant, and then he agreed.

I suspect there is more stuff going on in the first example, like body language, etc. It certainly can be submissive if you never take the lead in anything.



NeantHumain
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01 Oct 2008, 3:41 pm

Some women certainly like to mess with who they take to be submissive men.



carturo222
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01 Oct 2008, 7:54 pm

If any one of you is acquainted with a dominant woman, please let me know.



V4der
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01 Oct 2008, 8:12 pm

carturo222 wrote:
If any one of you is acquainted with a dominant woman, please let me know.


Hmm. I don't know. Are you going to kill her or ask her out on a date?

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pbcoll
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01 Oct 2008, 8:19 pm

The vast majority of women loathe submissive men, but not all do. I know a couple in which she's completely and utterly dominant; while he is not a complete wimp, he is a wimp in everything to do with his marriage. Most women will go for the dominant male, but not all - some look for a submissive man, some look for an egalitarian relationship. I also know a guy who is a complete and utter coward, people say behind his back that someone ought to give him a carpet as a gift, so that maybe his superiors will walk all over the carpet instead of him, yet he's fairly successful with women - he's a smooth talker, and is very skilled at romantic sweet talk.


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BokeKaeru
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02 Oct 2008, 12:40 am

I'm asexual, so I don't have the whole "wanting a strong man to better my children's genes" or whatever the usual rationale is.

However, I still do want a soulmate/partner. And for whatever reason as a kid, watching and reading stories I always liked the guy characters who WEREN'T the most powerful macho-men, preferring more timid, gentle, shy male characters instead. This has continued to be a trend in the fictional people I found most interesting. (I have yet to encounter people like that in real life, however...)

Also, I'm ambitious and clash with authority. It's not so much that I need to feel control over others, but rather that I don't like to feel held back or controlled. Especially if it's over something silly like being male or female. I'd prefer to be with someone who was willing to not be in charge, who didn't think it was their birthright to be the dominant one in a relationship. It would just take any concerns about competition or power struggles out of the equation, which would definitely be a good thing.

Lastly - this might be weird, but I sort of want a partner I can look after and protect. I want to be the person for someone who can be trusted to understand, take their side and help them even when others wouldn't. Probably a more dominant guy would find this unfavorable, and would prefer I be in such a role. The kind of guy I'm imagining wouldn't find it so difficult to allow for such role reversal, and would be happy to have someone to depend on.

I get the sense from some that these preferences are seen as warped in some ways... maybe it's that most people think women who like submissive guys are dominatrixes or users. I'm convinced that neither label could apply to me. It's just that the sort of person I'm "supposed" to like, the macho badass who takes charge all the time, doesn't interest me. Guys not caught up in that seem much more cuddly anyways.



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02 Oct 2008, 3:24 am

I am not a very "dominant" woman by any means, but the men I care about might seem submissive in contrast to "dominant" women...Well Flakey has a sort of gentle spirit, but I guess he is pretty "dominant" and has driven plenty "dominant" type women to the brink of insanity, I think, as a result.

My other friend is terribly akward and childlike and shy (in public) and I could imagine the sort of interractions he would have with a more "dominant" type woman. Compared to me, we are about equal...same with Flakey...

I guess I tend to assume submissive rolls...and I don't think I would like anyone much who was particularly submissive to me. I can be pretty darn nurturing...and what with my childlikeness...that would be pretty smothery...



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02 Oct 2008, 3:39 am

BokeKaeru wrote:
I'm asexual, so I don't have the whole "wanting a strong man to better my children's genes" or whatever the usual rationale is.

However, I still do want a soulmate/partner. And for whatever reason as a kid, watching and reading stories I always liked the guy characters who WEREN'T the most powerful macho-men, preferring more timid, gentle, shy male characters instead. This has continued to be a trend in the fictional people I found most interesting. (I have yet to encounter people like that in real life, however...)



If you are really asexual , then why your partner must be male? Why not being indifferent about the partner's gender?



carturo222
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02 Oct 2008, 2:12 pm

LePetitPrince wrote:
If you are really asexual , then why your partner must be male? Why not being indifferent about the partner's gender?


The term "asexual" denotes lack of sex drive, not lack of sexual orientation.