Asexual and/or Celibate

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I am not interested in any gender (yet) and I am celibate (I will be a virgin forever). Who is asexual and/or celibate as well?

I am celibate because I have no choice (I don't consider prostitution an option.)

I always felt that the term "involuntary celibacy" was something of an overreaction in most cases. If I couldn't have sex due to some serious physical impairment, that would be involuntary celibacy in my eyes.

from wikipedia:"Definition:

An involuntarily celibate person is someone who fails to initiate or sustain a sexual or romantic relationship, despite his/her desire to experience such a relationship."

Last edited by ValMikeSmith on 12 Oct 2008, 2:00 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I am celibate but definately not asexual. Ive not had sex for seven years!

I will make up for it when I meet the right guy

I'm asexual and celibate.

I'm aware of this, and I'm still perplexed.

How is someone failing to find a consenting partner for sexual intercourse (while also having a standard set of morals) confusing?
I mean, unless you consider masturbation a breech of celibacy, which I guess is fair.

I just don't see why it's called "involuntary celibacy". As far as I can tell whenever it has been discussed the so-called celibacy is still voluntary, to a point.

Fine, have it your way, Hector. I'm "voluntarily" celibate. Why? Because I have higher priorities than the mere act of sex... like finding the right person (though this seems to be impossible now.)

Yes, aspies have a stronger likelihood of being asexual (or celibate).

Hector said:

To put it bluntly, involuntary celibacy = Not wanting one's own virginity and not finding anyone willing to take it away. I suppose it could also include not-being-able to give it away too, if and when the opportunity is present, or there just is no opportunity. And less bluntly, "been alive for quite a while now and still ain't had a girl friend yet".

Also asexual and not planning on doing anything sexual here. Yay for there being more ase people on WP!

I'm not sure about the definition of celibacy presented here, though. Usually when I've heard about celibacy, it's not so much about virginity and simple lack of sex as it is actively abstaining from the activity out of a moral obligation. (I've also heard it used in some contexts to just mean people who don't want to marry, but that's hardly ever the case in usual usage) As far as I've seen on AVEN (the major asexual forum online), people avoid equating asexuality with celibacy, as the former is more about natural inclination and the latter is about personal choice.

Sorry for being anal. ; Just thought it was worth pointing out. If you haven't checked out AVEN (the Asexual Visibility and Education Network) yet, I recommend doing so.

I thought I was asexual/celibate, but I can't deny that the female form is alluring and attractive to my eyes. I am celibate for now because I'm not trying, however, I have a plan as to how to remedy this unpleasent situation, which I will initiate when I am finacially on my own. So I wait patiently for the right time

Another asexual/celibate here. Seems to be (relatively) common in autistics.

Yes, not being inclined to do sex at all is very common with aspies.
Or is it "normal" for AS already? At least in the sense that you have not to feel strange about it or that you have to change - its just what you are supposed to be?!

I hosted a discussion group of aspie-women for a while and all said the same. In their youth some experienced sex just for curiosity or before they wanted a friend and had to pay for that with sex. But later in life their relationsships were painful because they could hardly tolerate sex any more.
From what I heard it has to do with the overflooding of senses - we hear better, smell more, see more of the details around, remember every remark once made by the other person - all that is present at any moment of an Aspie life. And also when it comes to intimacy and with these sharp overactive senses Aspies can't let themselves go like NTs do at that point. For example, when you smell something strange in the carpet and try to find out what it is, you are distracted - while your partner is not smelling anything and just doing sex, blending out anything else.

As not all Aspies are the same, some may be able to blend out the external input via all senses to a certain extend. But if you can't or won't like to do so, just stay with what feels natural to you. There is no rule, that a human being has to want or like sex at all!