Someday I'll probably lose my job over this...

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Friday night I was at work and had a bit of a blow-up.
This was followed by an old familiar feeling of wanting to grab my stuff and walk out the door never to return.
I have actually done this many times before in my life which is how I tallied up 32 jobs before I hit the age of 30.

The last two times this has happened to me at my current job, though, I was able to recognize it and talk myself out of it.

Anyway... I just feel like I'm getting tired of people.
Not all people... just the ignorant types, the selfish types, the ones-who-seemingly-don't-want-to-consider-the-consequences-of-their-actions-types.

It's been building up for a little while now I suppose... getting tired of the people who drive around with their bass turned up in their cars to I have to hear and feel it in my own home
... the types of drivers who seem to not notice there are other people on the road too
... the smokers who continually throw their still-lit stubs on the ground
... the guy who rides his loud four-wheeler (all terrain scooter) up the private drive by my house after 11pm
... the 'thrifty nickel' (newspaper for selling and buying stuff) delivery folks who throw that garbage in my driveway when I never requested it
... the nurses at work who still cannot properly order a simple lab test on the computer despite having been working here for several years
... the nurses who jab and jab and jab patients for I.V.'s when it's obvious they don't know where-in-the-hell the vein is

and the straw-that-broke-the-camel's back on Friday night..... The tech who comes to work and keeps his cellphone plastered to his ear so he can argue all night long with women, which means I have a hard time getting his attention for work-related things!

I rushed in with a blood gas from the ICU and this guy gives me one of those looks that he thinks is funny but bugs the s**t out of me, all the while he has his phone up to his ear.
I need him to run the gas and as he ambles up to me after I call him over, I get pissed and tell him, "Why don't you quit talking to your f*****g girlfriends and do some work?".
The doctor who was attending the patient in the ICU actually was walking up behind the tech when I was saying this but I don't know what he thought about it.

Anyway, this tech... I go back a little later and apologize for my language and he's pissed at me.
His response was, "So, because you are having a hard time it's okay for you to talk disrespectfully to me?"

To which I replied, "No, R_____, I am apologizing for my language, but I'm really getting tired of you spending your whole shift on the cellphone with your girlfriends arguing."

Anyway, he does stuff like this that irritates people at work even though he's a pretty good tech in a technical sense.
He also talks about some of the people behind their backs... in not so kind words either... and I found it typical of people like him to get all pissed when he gets it back in his face for a change.

Generally I get along with him, but I'm not sure where we stand now and I really don't care too much right now.
I'm just wondering if he'll go to our supervisor and complain about me.

I do have this habit of getting all charged up and letting loose in situations other people find inappropriate.
I've done this in front of our COO (Chief Operating Officer), my supervisors; I've yelled at doctors before... etc.

Part of my problem also comes out when I am under certain types of emotional stress.
Just last week, my former wife and I were discussing our daughter and the possibility that her problems with a couple of classes and getting work turned in might be ADD.
I have it... my former wife has been told she probably has it by her colleagues (she's a pediatrician).. and our daughter acts so much like me in certain ways.

Anyway, this was probably the biggest stressor for me this week... my former wife made a remark about my parenting and I just haven't been able to shake off my feelings about that.

When I have something this major on my mind (another incident at work came about during the really stressful period of my separation/divorce), all those other little things that bug me.. like the ignorant little things people do... just add up to where I finally blow off that pressure.

Now... I don't get violent towards anyone and I don't normally jump all over folks, but I can lose it and slam my fist into a wall or door or get so upset that I need to walk away for a bit.

These things don't go over well in any workplace and a hospital is no exception.

We'll see if anything comes of this latest event.
I've already talked with a couple of people from work tonight (just dropped by for other stuff).

Sorry... guess I'm just unloading tonight around WP.

poor you!

(((big hugs)))

That sounds a horrible day at work, I really feel for you. I would loose my temper at those guys as well, they sound really annoying.

I hate it when my parenting is criticized too. I ruminate about it and replay what the person has said and go over all my parenting faults, this makes me grumpy and a worse parent.

you sound like you need to give yourself some treats to cheer your self up and reward your self for sticking with your job.

I hope you have a better day today.

I know what you mean about the nurses. This one time I went in for a blood test, a nurse kept whining to me like a 3 year old. "I can't find the vein! I can't find the vein!" like I was supposed to be able to do something about it. Then when she started saying she'd have to put the needle into my hand, I told her to get someone else. She of course stormed off like an angry kid. It's unbelievable. Something I find interesting about the hospital I go to, given that there is so much size prejudice in this world, is that the only guy who's able to take blood well happens to be fat. How's that for all those people who want to think fat people are completely useless?

I'm sorry.

Thank you.

The night actually finished out well enough because my daughter was at work waiting to go home with me.
This always spurs me onto getting out of the hospital as soon as I can after my shift is over.

As far as the parenting thing... it's just that I am not a bad parent and to have my former wife criticize me, really gets to me.
She tried to get full custody during our divorce by saying I was unfit to be even a part-time parent.
This fell apart because of many reasons, one of which is the fact that because she's a doctor... when she returned to work after our daughter was born, I was the stay-at-home parent for all those years (except the ones I really needed/wanted to get out and go back to work... not that I didn't want to be with our daughter... just that it felt weird not having a job outside of home).

Anyway, our daughter is fine and doing quite well in life.
My former wife was trying to blame me for our daughter not turning in some school assignments based upon one school year some time ago when I disagreed with a teacher having our daughter keep a daily reading log (the whole class had to actually because too many kids were not doing their reading outside of school... our daughter on-the-other-hand, has always been a voracious reader, so I felt this assignment was a waste of time).
Eh... basically, I'm too defensive whenever my former wife takes jabs at me like that.
I need to learn not to let them get to me like that... and especially not take it to work with me.

Yeah, I'm pretty happy that I haven't walked away from this job in 6+ years.
It's the longest I've worked anywhere... and they really do put up with my ADD/HD'ness quite well, though, I am a good worker once I get there.

Thanks again... I suppose I was needing to vent a bit last night.



I have worked in the medical field since 1976.
I didn't start sticking people with needles until 1978, but I have had many years of experience drawing blood and starting I.V.'s in the hospital, blood bank, and out in the field.
I tell you... people lay out so many excuses for why they miss a vein

Now, having said that... I will also say that no matter what a person's experience in handling needles... they are all still human and prone to making mistakes. It's just when they start laying blame on the patient's veins or the patient themselves that I get a bit perturbed.
Yes.. sometimes the veins will contract if the person is dehydrated or nervous.
Yes.. sometimes the patient flinches or downright jerks which causes the stick to go bad.
yes.. sometimes the veins are hard to find for one person but not for another.

But I just hear too many excuses when the person sticking should just up and say, "Sorry, but I missed".
Then hopefully the patient will understand that we are not robots and cannot be 100% accurate 100% of the time.

Anyway, when my attitude stars going downhill, any little thing a person does that comes across as uncaring or inconsiderate, really grates me and it all just builds up.

Oh.. and people of size? One of the best people I have ever had the pleasure of working with in the medical field was a guy who took on a lot of weight. His fingers looked like sausages, yet his accuracy was noteworthy!
And this was with the big 16ga. needles we were using at the blood bank!
It's a matter of sensitivity in the fingertips, a knowledge of the body, experience (often, although I've seen some new people do quite well), and confidence... as well as just being present at the moment.

Thanks.
I'm feeling better now and I was called up last night to come in for a few hours this morning to cover for someone who's sick.

I actually really enjoy going to work.
It's the one place I can focus best in because I have this one job and no other major distractions.

I'll never forget the time I drew blood from a massive trucker. I was a small teenager then. He fainted and fell on top of me.

Okay... now I'm imagining all sorts of possible scenarios... lol

A massive trucker attacks Lelia and she draws her sword and draws blood...

Lelia, a small teenager with long sharp fingernails, drives home her point in a heated conversation with a massive trucker by jabbing him with one of her pointed digits and upon seeing his own blood spilling out from his chest... he collapses upon poor Lelia who remarks, "Next time I'll use a long stick so I'll have time to stay out of the fallzone!"

or maybe something much milder...

Lelia works/volunteers at the local blood bank and one day this massive trucker appears and offers to donate a pint... of blood.
Lelia sets to work by pricking his finger in order to check the giant gentleman's hematocrit, and the sight of a single drop of his own blood brings yet another confirmation to the old saying... "the bigger they are, the harder they fall". Unfortunately, our Lelia was not quick enough to slip out from under the crashing behemoth!

Sorry... couldn't resist...

Oh.. Um. Right. Needed a few more specifics did I? As I was working my way through Medical Technology school (two years community college and two years at the University of Washington, Seattle) at a hospital drawing blood and then testing it, a trucker came in for his laboratory blood draw. etc.

The funniest blood draw I ever did was on a seven year old cute, chunky Philipino girl who was accompanied by mom, grandmother, and a variety of other related adults. As soon as I stuck her, she proclaimed loudly at all the women while banging her free fist on the desk in an adult, husky voice, "OW! That hurt! You told me it wouldn't hurt! You lied to me. It did hurt! You shouldn't tell somebody something won't hurt when it will!" The blood draw was easy, but I could imagine how I would have been lectured if I had had any difficulty. I'm glad it wasn't me who told her it wouldn't hurt. I never made that promise.

Thanks for clearing that up... you just blew my fantasies to pieces... LOL

Med Tech huh? We need a few more down my way... wanna relocate?
I promise I won't talk to you like I did R______, ... really!


I actually worked with him again a couple of nights ago and I brought the event up... he's over it... I'm over it... all is well in the Emerald Triangle once again... at least in my teeny tiny little corner of it

This may be missing the main point, but you say people who throw cigarettes on the ground annoy you...this one time, I was in a car at traffic lights, and this woman was outside smoking (banned smoking in enclosed public places), and she dropped the lit cigarette onto the floor and stepped on it, but it didn't go out and got stuck in the groove on the bottom of her shoe, and she didn't notice. Lulz.

I don't see anything wrong with this behavior or language. NTs do this too (watch one of Gordon Ramsay's shows - you'll see him do this all the time). As long as you have a legitimate complaint (ie - using work time for personal calls) you're fine doing this.

I would say the one mistake was going back and apologizing. You completely undermined your previous position of power. Now he won't take you seriously next time.

HOTFOOT! hahaha

Yeah, when all the bans on smoking were really getting rolling, I used to hear so many smokers complain about how they felt they were being discriminated against and no one liked smokers.....
I could care less if someone smokes in a bar or restaurant if the owners say it's okay... I just won't go there or work there.
But... the vast majority of smoker I see in real life, reflexively throw their garbage on the streets which really pisses me off.
ESPECIALLY WHEN THE BUTT IS STILL SMOKING!






Well, I'm not sure about your age, but being 48 I tend to feel my language was unnecessary in my place of work.
Just general communication with other people... it has always seemed to work better when I am not yelling profanities at someone It doesn't matter who else does it.... I just felt I could have used different language and achieved the same or better results.

As far as 'undermining' my so-called previous position of power...

You might consider being more careful about over-generalizing with a situation you receive second-hand or with people you know anything of.

I can assure you that this guy would still take me seriously concerning a work matter such as the one I yelled at him for.
Apologizing is not the same as subjugation or capitulation.
I did not 'give up' anything by apologizing for my choice of words while still standing behind my argument.

I AM STILL ALL MIGHTY AND POWERFUL!