Do you appear normal to the rest of the world?

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Do you appear normal to the rest of the world?
Yes 34%  34%  [ 36 ]
No 22%  22%  [ 23 ]
Sometimes 44%  44%  [ 46 ]
Total votes : 105

SeaBright
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13 Dec 2008, 11:25 am

Hmm. I didn't vote. I get treated as if I have a completely different and almost completely backwards and conflicting 'mindset' than I do. From men, depending on my body shape and level of external happiness at the time, I am treated on a level from hooker to stripper to porn star, and more recently the risk factor to 'mens club rule' in the employment/labor sectors.

From women, I am treated with animosity and shadowed hatred, looked upon as 'the other woman', or a violent 'gang banger'. The police, ah well, they are the police. Trained to think everyone who doesn't dress in code and think in communion is a drug user.
Every once in awhile I get someone who 'gets me'. And that is nice.
I am not alone here. I know that. I have learned alot about coping by observing others who I feel are in a similar boat than me, the problem is most of them smoke pot-and I don't, so this tends to be a problem for them; and I keep few friends because of it.

But, whether people see me as 'normal'? People don't see me. People see what they fantasize and then overlay that assumption as 'reality' onto who they see. To them they are seeing a normal whatever they are kidding themselves about. Yeah I look normal, but the normal I look to an NT is not the normal that I am.

Bumper Sticker: People suck. They can all go to h*ll. Except those that 'get me'.


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ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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13 Dec 2008, 11:29 am

People see me as a strange, exotic, beauty but very aloof.



Anniemaniac
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13 Dec 2008, 12:18 pm

Yes. I think this is why some people have a hard time believing/understanding my AS.

I look normal, so when they find out that I have something like AS, they find it incredibly difficult to wrap their mind about it.



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13 Dec 2008, 5:52 pm

am not seen as 'normal' as strangers will offer their help even when it isnt needed,or start conversations with staff about something am doing.

some see am as their meaning of a dangerous pyscho because they've only ever seen am in meltdowns and not when am not in any attacking,trashing or self injuring sort of states.
some see am as severely mentally retarded when am fully non verbal-even when am using a laptop infront of them and am probably better at using one than them so its obvious am not s/MR,and some see am as profoundly deaf when they see am wearing ear defenders as well as being NV-they tend to either shout and set off a meltdown,or not speak themselves and do everything in makaton instead.

everyone seems to have their own judgements based on what they see,rather than what they know about that person,so if are an 'obvious autistic', are never going to look 'normal' whether outside- in the community or inside the home-with family/support staff,but...who cares,why should care-
putting things into normal v not normal groups is about as useless as the arguing filled class system that goes on in IQ results threads on here.


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Magliabechi
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13 Dec 2008, 6:00 pm

KingdomOfRats wrote:
some see am as profoundly deaf when they see am wearing ear defenders


How ironic! What possible reason could a deaf person have for wearing ear defenders?
It's strange how normative people often seem to lose the ability to apply common sense when they meet an unorthodox person.

Magliabechi.



elderwanda
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13 Dec 2008, 6:59 pm

I don't know what the rest of the world thinks. I am aware of feeling invisible most of the time. I don't even get glanced at very often. I've noticed that if I go to out for coffee with my friend, people (shopkeepers, random people, etc.) say hi to her, and sometimes stop and chat, but don't seem to notice me until I make a comment, and then it's like they are surprised that someone was standing there, and they respond to my comment, addressing my friend. At times I've thought that maybe it's because I'm ugly or funny-looking, although there's nothing particularly weird-looking about me. Once, a waitress in a restaurant actually said to my husband, "Your wife is so pretty!" I think I have a what you might call, a face with character. I don't know.

I don't feel like people are judging me one way or another, though. They just don't see me.



marshall
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13 Dec 2008, 7:26 pm

It's not easy to tell unless you ask people and they are willing to give an honest answer (which is never guarunteed).

That said, I believe that I appear very normal at first glance. I'm pretty good at not standing out. Random people usually just assume I'm shy because I'm not good with small-talk. I'm not shy so much as I don't have much to say to strangers, at least nothing beyond discussing the weather and such.

People probably see me as too cerebral. I think more than I speak. Somehow this intimidates people and they get awkward with me.



CanyonWind
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13 Dec 2008, 7:46 pm

Superficially, I look normal. There's nothing unusual anybody would spot in a photograph.

But I'm often amazed by how quickly people can determine that there's something about me they don't like, something that inspires hostility, contempt, dismissal, and aversion. A lot of times it's before I say anything.

Before I found out about Asperger's, I thought that maybe I smelled bad. It seemed that would explain the response I got from people. For a while, I took showers ridiculously often. It didn't do any good.


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ImTheGuyThatDidThat
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13 Dec 2008, 7:49 pm

""Very simple, do you appear normal(NT) to strangers, basically people you see walking down the street, walking in the mall, etc..., simply put, people you do not know.""

Good question - but another question immediatly comes
to my mind. I would have to stop and ask them all and
where would i find the time? I try not to worry about
things i have no control over, and other people say
and think so much weird stuff anyway, its just
people



Vulcan
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13 Dec 2008, 7:57 pm

i votes Yes...

but i should note that i myself think i look normal.. how i indeed look to others i do not know?



Followthereaper90
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13 Dec 2008, 8:01 pm

Exile wrote:
I don't think "normal" is the right word for moi.

But it's not abnormal either.

8)
french? :lol:


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Followthereaper90
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13 Dec 2008, 8:07 pm

anyway they see me as normal if its not been stressfull school day or someting basically im fine as long i dont meltdown :P


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vulcanpastor
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13 Dec 2008, 11:18 pm

People have to actually spend time with me to notice that something is amiss. On the surface, I seem normal.



Who_Am_I
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13 Dec 2008, 11:27 pm

Where is the option for "how in God's name am I meant to be able to tell?"


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Fidget
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13 Dec 2008, 11:33 pm

I think I do appear NT to most people. Not to brag, but I am very high functioning for the most part. I've even had a few people who were shocked to find out I had a disorder. When people want to poke fun at me for being different, they usually bring up my sexual orientation more than anything else.



Fidget
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13 Dec 2008, 11:34 pm

vulcanpastor wrote:
People have to actually spend time with me to notice that something is amiss. On the surface, I seem normal.


Me too.