connection between aspergers and asexuality?

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Joshandspot
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19 Dec 2008, 5:13 pm

Just curious if anyone knows what the connection between the two is if there is any? and is there any?



anna-banana
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19 Dec 2008, 5:23 pm

yeah I noticed that a lot of people here claim to be asexual to some extent. what I've been wondering about is how much that is the effect of antidepressants and other medication (I know SSRIs pretty much killed my libido when I was taking them).


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capriwim
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19 Dec 2008, 7:22 pm

I'm asexual, and I don't take any medications. I simply don't have any sexual feelings. I don't get crushes, or fantasies, and I've tried dating but it never feels any different from friendships. I've tried to conjure up sexual feelings, in various ways recommended by friends, but nothing happens, and after a while I just decided that since I'm happy as I am, what is the point trying to drum up something that isn't there?

I don't know what the relation is to Asperger's though. I've heard that asexuality is more common amongst people with Aspergers than amongst NTs, but I wonder if that is really the case, or whether Aspies are simply more honest about not having 'normal' feelings, whereas NTs like to pretend to be normal. From the research I've read on asexuality, it seems most common in females who are underweight and who had a late menarche (all of which apply to me), so maybe it's not really so much to do with Aspergers after all.



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19 Dec 2008, 7:45 pm

I've wondered if I might qualify but all depends on what the exact definition of asexuality is? I have had multiple sex partners and a slew of failed relationships and dating disasters. However the past 5 yrs (maybe more I don't even remember) I have had really no desire for another relationship, sex or anything. I have always had such sensory issues that I never enjoyed being grabbed and hugged, kissed or having sex so I don't really miss it. I've found in my life experience 99% of people in this world are either morons or creeps so I have lost any interest in even dating. I have sexual attraction to celebraties every once in awhile, but seriously I seldom think of sex these days. Most days I have no use for another human at all and if I do its only for 1-3 hour increments. Does that make me asexual?



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19 Dec 2008, 8:41 pm

I don't think I'm genuinely asexual, but I never understood the concept of "physically attractive", have no idea what the difference between loving someone as a friend and being in love is, and I am very sensitive to touch (to the point where can I go into sensory overload and become unable to sleep and eat just from being touched too much in a day), so I guess it's a matter of definition. I am currently a virgin, and not actively trying to do anything about that as I suspect it would be a very arduous task both for me and for the other person, and said hypothetical person (who'd pretty much have to understand me better than I do, yet find themself strangely attracted to me and compelled to tell me exactly what they want, in spite of knowing that I am the way I am, as I can't read signals and wouldn't think of bringing it up myself) probably doesn't exist anyway (due to the inherent contradictions), so it all seems like at worst a catch 22 and at best a waste of time to me.

I'm not on any kind of medication.


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Moop
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19 Dec 2008, 9:09 pm

I have sexual attractions, but I'm not interested in actual sex.
I don't consider myself asexual, but I have a much lower libido than many other people. I've also been on antidepressants. They were weird, they gave me a higher libido.



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27 Dec 2008, 8:07 am

Asexuality seems to be far more common among the autistic community. I'm not completely asexual, since I do have some minor physical urges from time to time, but I have extremely little sex drive and really would much rather do the job myself and am far more stimulated by intellectual and emotional intercourse than sexual. And yes, I do see it as a job that just needs to be done, much like eating or urinating.



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27 Dec 2008, 8:18 am

I'm asexual (at least, I very strongly suspect, I'm almost sure) and I don't take any meds. I don't know what the connection is with AS, but I think there is one since a lot of people here claim to be asexual.


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886
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27 Dec 2008, 10:43 am

I think alot of aspies claim to be asexual so they can hide behind it because they know they will never get laid.

Harsh opinion? Probably. But mostly true.


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crackedpleasures
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27 Dec 2008, 10:50 am

Have to agree with 886 here. I am aware asexuality really exists, but we talk about the smallest minority amongst minorities here, and certainly the smallest minority within the sexual spectrum. So I am sure that there are some people actually asexual, I am however also sure many who claim to be asexual are only asexual in their own believes. In other words, amongst the asexuals I am quite sure only a minority is actually asexual.

There can be reasons enough why someone would claim to be asexual. I just look at myself: I have erotophobia so I suppressed my attraction to women for several years because I found it hard to cope with any sexual feelings. I tried to live an asexual life, but after a while realised things just dont work that way because inside I was still longing for a girlfriend. I may have claimed to be asexual at some point, but this was just a make belief and in the end my attraction to women was always there even when I tried to deny it.

Asexuals who are REALLY asexual are a very small minority, so I am quite convinced that a majority of so called asexuals are trying to suppress their sexual feelings rather than being truly asexual. I am not trying to say people here lie though, because I know real asexuals exist. But they are a very tiny minority. I highly doubt there is a connection with AS, other than those trying to believe they are asexual due to lack of romantic involvement.


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27 Dec 2008, 2:52 pm

Seems like Aspie women in particular have a weaker-than-average sex drive and think that most (NT)women are this way too........ :?



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27 Dec 2008, 4:09 pm

I dont see a connection and dont, or rather never taken medication due to my aspergers anyway >_>
and i do have sexual desires towards females.

I guess it's maybe just some sort of coincidence? or somethign to do with the behavior?
being less social, gah dunno :?



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28 Dec 2008, 10:34 am

886 wrote:
I think alot of aspies claim to be asexual so they can hide behind it because they know they will never get laid.

Harsh opinion? Probably. But mostly true.


I don't know for sure, to be honest. I'm quite popular, and I can get laid. I just never think of sex, it hardly ever crossess my mind and porn doesn't do me anything. I don't know what the situation is of other aspies.


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28 Dec 2008, 11:12 am

I've known far more people here claiming to be asexual than in any other community I've experienced. The actual cause of that, and how much it necessarily has to do with AS, is a total mystery to me.

I personally have a difficult time imagining how anyone can be asexual, but then I also have a hard time imagining how people can be attracted to men instead of women. Since I first started having sexual thoughts, I haven't experienced much else than my own apparently natural desire for the opposite sex.



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28 Dec 2008, 12:23 pm

I don't see any connection between the two. There are a lot of Aspies with raging libidos.


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Jol
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28 Dec 2008, 10:22 pm

I'm on the team thats having sex wondering why the other team aint.

Sorry there is too much division here for this to be a "sign" of aspergers. ... That being said, I have long suspected that SSRI or actually being depressed will drop the libado to nothing.