Sickening disgusting people.

Post Reply New Topic

Oh yeah, I can relate to the OP. I've put up with this to a lesser extent with my parents. I have dreams of stabbing them both with a machete. That sucks pretty bad doesn't it? I hate emotional abuse. I can only wonder what it would be like if they were worse. Maybe in that case my nightmares would become reality. I can only imagine. Thankfully I've instilled my own set of values, but damn if I don't feel like punching them both in the back of the head sometimes.

Bella, you have a way of breaking my heart, reading what you write. I am so sorry you have experienced all that you have.

I know you miss your daughter and wish you could be the mother you want to be, and that she needs, but you need to heal yourself first. Please do that. Take time for yourself. Become who you were meant to be. There is a whole future ahead of you, time to be who you wish to be, to have and give love in a healthy way. But there are roads to take before you will be there. Take them. Learn. Grow. Come to believe in yourself. Who you are and who you will be. Grow in the ways you might have as a child if you had lived in a safer environment. Give yourself the gift of time and healing. Your daughter will still be your daughter when you are done with all that, and the relationship the two of you will be able to have will be the stronger for it.

Think of a forest that has been in a fire. It can not hold nor nuture life. But in the quiet, as it gives itself time to heal, it finds it's strength. The trees heal, and begin to grow again. The life around them returns.

I hold up my hand and admit I am a sick and disgusting parent. Yesterday I was at the end of my tether, and screamed at my 2 month old son (from a distance). He has been crying non-stop day and night since he was born. I had just accidently knocked his AS 2 yr-old brother, who crepted behind me unnoticed, and subsequently fell on his head crying. I was in shock. My wife come in and said I am insane and has asked for a divorce. My wife feels I should leave the home in case I will hurt the children one day. Only the day before, we were happily enjoying a meal out with parents of AS children, sharing our experiences and pain.

I need my wife and children, but most importantly I feel I can contribute to my AS child's well-being. He loves being in my company. We are both AS. Love is patience, love is kind. But where can I draw patience from in situations where you just can't give anymore? NT or AS, we are humans, we can't always be in tip-top condition 24/7. I left the house for the day as I just wanted a breather, but my NT wife thinks I not fit to live in the same home for abandoning them. I said I needed a breather. It is so difficult.

I guess parents lose it after a while because kids are lot of work and they take lot of patience and parents can hold it for so long, they finally have an outburst because they couldn't hold it in anymore. Then the whole process starts all over until they lose it again.

We just happen to catch them when they couldn't hold it in anymore. Doesn't mean they do it all the time when we catch them. But then again our thoughts don't matter because they are never going to see us again so the parents aren't going to care what we think.

I do not agree, at least for myself. Being an AS I am very concerned about how my AS son will perceive the world around him. I don't wish my son to thrive on self-pity, lost, and hate, as a means of sustaining his life on planet earth. I want him to feel loved, and to have the capacity to love, if that is possible for AS.

The day I am never going to see him again is when I die. But I care about how he thinks, that's why I need to help him whilst I'm here. I hope I can do more help than harm though. AS are not known for their patience, and to adapt to changes to the new environment. Quick fixes are not going to work here unfortunately.

I would suggest that you and your wife go in for counseling. The kids will thrive best with both parents, and with both parents getting along.

Many parents have patience issues. The thing is to recognize them upfront, and find a way to cool off before something happens. My husband knows he can leave our house to cool off, anytime, no questions asked. Daddy giving himself a time out. We'll talk about it later. This is the compromise our family needs to keep everyone safe and sane. He brings so much to our family, but he does have temperament issues. We knew it before our first child was born, and did a lot of talking and a lot questioning and a lot compromising. And the process continues. In a way, I think it's good for our children to see an adult not being perfect, and bearing consequences as a result. We talk about breaking habits NOW and learning better ways, because it only gets harder later. But, still, it's hard. It isn't what I dreamed of. But, heck, I bring my own baggage to the marriage, and it all balances out somehow someway someday.

Talk with a professional. See what can be done to save your marriage. It's OK not to be perfect, but you will need a process for it, and your wife will need to know how to read your stress level. We're not talking easy roads. But, I think, the journey will be worth it for your family.

I had never thought of that. Thank you for your kind advice. And Good Luck with your journey too.

I agree about the parents being stressed and all that and that's why I said they should get psychiatric help.

Often it is the child causing the problems and needs psychiatric help.

I was reviewing the autism funding available through Medicare (Australia) and was pleased to see you can get subsidised mental health therapy for children on the autism spectrum but the funding also extends to cover, parents, carers and siblings. From some things my 5 year old has been saying recently and the places my head has been going I think we might end up using some of the family therapy sessions this year.

I think if it's once in awhile it's okay but no that doesn't mean you can do it on purpose once in awhile. But if you lose it all the time, then that's when you need help.

I work at my local public library and I have seen extremes on both sides. I have seen babies in strollers get yelled at by their parents because they were crying. These poor kids need to get home and take a nap. I have also seen young kids run around screaming and yelling at each other-and the parents and teachers do nothing to stop it. There is a huge difference between being tired and overstimulated and behaving like a brat.