Page 1 of 2 [ 24 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2  Next

larsenjw92286
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 30 Aug 2004
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 8,857
Location: Seattle, Washington

11 Dec 2005, 9:23 am

I know words in the English language sound similar, but it bothers me when someone thinks I'm saying something, and I mean something else totally different. Is anyone else bothered by this?


_________________
Jason Larsen
[email protected]


Astarael
Green Highlighter

User avatar

Joined: 6 Aug 2005
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,293

11 Dec 2005, 9:26 am

Yeah, I'm bothered by it. Especially if someone starts responding to what I've said and they've totally misinterpreted what I said and they can't understand what I'm saying.



Musical_Lottie
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Sep 2005
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 656
Location: Bedfordshire, East of England

11 Dec 2005, 10:32 am

It bothers me when that happens because I start to wonder where I went wrong - how I managed to mangle whatever I was trying to say. But it bothers me even more when it's the other way round - I often misinterpret things, and wonder why they give me funny looks. It then takes a while to establish that I misinterpreted it, by which time I just want the ground to swallow me up because I feel so stupid.


_________________
Spectrumite ... somewhere.


Larval
Black Doves
Black Doves

User avatar

Joined: 15 Nov 2005
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,037

11 Dec 2005, 11:33 am

This happens to me a lot, and it always drives me mad.

I find how I'm misunderstood varies from person to person, so it always takes me a while to figure out how to explain things clearly, without causing the same sort of confusion.



neongrl
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Oct 2005
Age: 42
Gender: Female
Posts: 704
Location: Delhi, Ontario, Canada

11 Dec 2005, 1:23 pm

Half the time I'm the one assuming - assuming that the person I'm talking to is going to totally misunderstand what I'm saying, because it happens so often. There's just something about my communication IRL...



AbominableSnoCone
Cybernetic Vampiric Werewolf Ninja
Cybernetic Vampiric Werewolf Ninja

User avatar

Joined: 15 Jun 2005
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,691
Location: Jersey

11 Dec 2005, 1:29 pm

You all know what happens when you assume don't you?


_________________
Join the ASAN social groups in NYC & NJ!
http://aspergers.meetup.com/309/
http://aspergers.meetup.com/318/


lowfreq50
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 May 2005
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,588
Location: Gainesville, Florida

11 Dec 2005, 1:32 pm

I sometimes say the wrong word in place of the right word... but this is nothing unusual. NTs do this too.

My problem is I can't always understand the words someone says. I hear the sound but my brain assigns no meaning to the sound. That's the best way I can describe it. I'm known for saying "What?" all the time.



catwhowalksbyherself
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 6 Dec 2005
Gender: Female
Posts: 125
Location: Reading, UK

11 Dec 2005, 1:45 pm

I once went into spasms of embarrassment when someone asked me where I came from, and I answered that both my parents were northerners... (I was trying to interview a chairman of an organisation I was involved in, I knew him a little bit but not well, and the university newspaper asked if I could get him to speak to them for a debate we were covering).

He meant, "where have you just come from today"...

I was mortified for at least a week afterwards.


_________________
I am the cat who walks by herself, and all places are alike to me --- (after) Rudyard Kipling

People don't want a date with destiny, they just want a date with a dentist. --- Michael Howard


SpaceCase
Queen of Carebears
Queen of Carebears

User avatar

Joined: 14 Mar 2005
Age: 29
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,674
Location: Pennsylvania, USA

11 Dec 2005, 3:59 pm

I can never say exzactly what I mean and it's annoying!! !


-SpaceCase :x


_________________
Live and let live.


Aspie1
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Mar 2005
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,531
Location: United States

11 Dec 2005, 7:35 pm

There seems to be a double standard. When an NT says a wrong thing, all he/she has to do is say: "No, I didn't mean X, I meant Y", and everyone gives an "oh ok, no problem", and all is forgotten. When an aspie say a wrong thing by mistake, no one listens, no matter how hard an aspie tries to explain him/herself. And the aspie has to take the heat for many days, just because he/she made an honest mistake. That irritates me to no end. Does anyone else feel this way?



hale_bopp
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Nov 2004
Gender: Female
Posts: 17,774
Location: None

11 Dec 2005, 7:47 pm

Assumptions make up 95% of the worlds problems, everyone is guilty of it, everyone.



Liorda
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

User avatar

Joined: 26 Nov 2005
Gender: Female
Posts: 88
Location: USA

11 Dec 2005, 10:31 pm

SpaceCase wrote:
I can never say exzactly what I mean and it's annoying!! !

-SpaceCase :x

Me neither, sometimes it's annoying. It's like what I'm thinking gets turned around before it comes out my mouth.


hale_bopp wrote:
Assumptions make up 95% of the worlds problems, everyone is guilty of it, everyone.


Well, you know what the say about "Ass-u-me" - make an "ASS" out of "U" and "ME"! !!


_________________
Just because you can doesn't mean you should!


fahreeq
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 15 Aug 2005
Gender: Female
Posts: 590

11 Dec 2005, 10:33 pm

Aspie1 wrote:
There seems to be a double standard. When an NT says a wrong thing, all he/she has to do is say: "No, I didn't mean X, I meant Y", and everyone gives an "oh ok, no problem", and all is forgotten. When an aspie say a wrong thing by mistake, no one listens, no matter how hard an aspie tries to explain him/herself. And the aspie has to take the heat for many days, just because he/she made an honest mistake. That irritates me to no end. Does anyone else feel this way?


There are a lot of double standards, not just with miscommunications.



Astarael
Green Highlighter

User avatar

Joined: 6 Aug 2005
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,293

12 Dec 2005, 5:08 am

Yeah, agreed with the double standards comment. I have that problem all the time, I get so annoyed because I'll start explaining myself and then no one cares or they're like "what? just forget about it", or tell me that that's not what I meant. Gah! I think I'd know what I meant!



GalileoAce
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 9 May 2005
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,180
Location: Australia

12 Dec 2005, 8:34 am

(might haveh been said already)

I have noticed that "NT"s (for lack of a better term) respond more to tone than the actual words I've said...

NTs (..) communicate in body language, tone, then words... Whereas Aspies, I feel, communicate mostly via words...