13 Dec 2005, 8:58 pm
rarmccoy wrote:
What is specifically different about them is that every member of my husband's family here has some sort of mental disorder that affects their perception of the world to a degree that exceeds average/NT range.
Ah! This makes sense now! You aren't having trouble reading body language. You're dealing with neurotic people! I was having a hard time understanding for a while. Yeah, that's a whole different ballgame, and one I've experienced as well. With such people, it doesn't matter how much energy you put into building ARC (affinity, reality, and communication), because they have a WHOLE other agenda. The only way to get on the same page with them is to have their illnesses, and that isn't in your hands.
rarmccoy wrote:
Around here, I get stares if I sit with my ankle on top of my knee (guy-style) because in the South, ladies don't do that. But in Alaska and Minnesota, even New Jersey - that doesn't even draw a second thought.
Yep. Sounds right. Well, you'll get that stuff eventually. Mannerisms you can control and learn to modify. It sounds like your very capable and willing to accomodate your surroundings.
rarmccoy wrote:
(Good article on body language, btw. 
)
)Thanks for saying so.
14 Dec 2005, 4:09 am
rarmccoy wrote:
grayson wrote:
And I know how unnatural and probably impossible it is, but if you can possibly adopt some Southern speech mannerisms, that might help a lot.
I shudder to hear that, though yes, I've know the lumping bit for a long time. The Southern accent makes me wince though. I'm a stickler for proper language, and it barely exists here. It's like fingernails down the blackboard (which, incidentally, doesn't bother me at all). I've started to say "y'all" instead of "you all" but I haven't made much more progress. I can't say the whole "as far as" in front of everything said, but come to think of it, I have managed to start using the "bless her/his heart" at the end of sentences in an effort to gel more.
Wow...you can say "bless his heart"? I grew up in NC and I still can't get that across my lips!
I used to hate the Southern accent when I was younger, but now I think it sounds pretty; very lilting and like honey. I don't have much of one myself, however; I worked hard not to.
I didn't realize "As far as" was a Southern thing. Interesting. As far as that goes, I ......
rarmccoy wrote:
Out of curiosity, what have you heard about TEACCH with respect to testing for adults? I've only had dealing with them on rare occasions, and then only for children.
I haven't heard much, just that they are good, and that was in the context of children's resources. My AS daughter moved back to live with her father 1.5 years ago, in Chapel Hill, and they talked about TEACCH for a while (but never did anything more; Dad would prefer to think I just screwed up our daughter than that she has A Condition of any kind
. Fortunately, his wife is wonderful and excellent with our daughter, and our daughter is seeing a really great therapist, so things are working out well despite his being an utter ***hole ).
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