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crazycatlady
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10 Jan 2009, 8:56 pm

This evening, I was out with my mom and younger sister. There was a long wait at the restaurant we were going to, so they decided to go to the nearby Macy's. Now, my mother has been bugging me to expand my wardrobe since I was in junior high (mid-twenties now). We'd been in there less than a minute when she said she wanted to buy me a top.

First of all, I generally hate going shopping (except for food, books, toys, and yarn). I don't like being out in public very long, and when I'm in a store with so many things to look at and so many people walking around and bright lights, I sometimes withdraw and feel like a zombie until I can get out of the store. I'm also insanely particular about what I wear, and I won't even consider anything that isn't a certain color, looks even remotely clingy or form-fitting, isn't an acceptable material, is revealing in any way, looks feminine, etc. I pretty much stick to t-shirts, zip-up hoodies, and loose pants (luckily my office is pretty casual). And it doesn't help that I'm only 4 foot 9 and overweight (on the plus side, kids' shoes are cheap and comfy, even if they don't last very long).

I kind of pity my mom for having to put up with my stubborn behavior (I was also a little grumpy because I hadn't eaten all day). I wouldn't even consider the things she and my sister were suggesting (I found one sweatshirt in the men's department that I really liked, but it was expensive). I did let her get me some socks, though.

Anyone else have shopping issues?



CelticRose
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10 Jan 2009, 9:52 pm

Oh, yes. I hate shopping in general, and I really hate shopping for clothes. I have curves, and it's difficult to find clothes that fit when they're all designed for stick figures. Also, I'm petite and finding pants the right length is difficult, and forget about finding long sleeved tops that don't have sleeves that are a mile too long for my short arms.

I do most of my clothes shopping by mail order. I only go to the stores for things that I absolutely have to try on.


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murasaki_ahiru
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10 Jan 2009, 10:35 pm

I used to be a bit like that but once I found a store which has the style I love I go there. Bit exxy but worth it. Their jeans fit me so nicely.



sheknight
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10 Jan 2009, 10:35 pm

I haven't set foot in a mall in years. It's just way too much sensory input for me to be at ease, and the only shopping I enjoy is for antiques, or to buy things for my hobbies. Clothes are so overrated, as far as I'm concerned. I think a return to togas would be great.

Of the NT women I've known, many have wanted to make me over. They don't seem to like that I only force myself to dress up when the situation absolutely calls for it. Being dressed up makes me really, really uncomfortable. Everything about it just feels contrary to my nature. Back when I was still trying to fit into the NT world, I dressed up all the time. Not only was I constantly physically uncomfortable, but too many people would come up and just start talking to me. Ugh.

I wonder why NT women care about what we wear, or that we rarely wear make-up. Do they feel sorry for us? Are we somehow insulting them by not wanting to be like them? I can never tell.



Jutty
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10 Jan 2009, 11:04 pm

crazycatlady, I was reading your post about how you hate shopping for clothes with looking first at who posted it, and in my mind i was thinking that it was a guy that posted, adn thought about if its unusal that i'm a male aspie and I enjoy shopping.



crazycatlady
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11 Jan 2009, 12:41 am

sheknight wrote:
I wonder why NT women care about what we wear, or that we rarely wear make-up. Do they feel sorry for us? Are we somehow insulting them by not wanting to be like them? I can never tell.


I don't understand it either. A lot of my female friends don't give a damn about fashion or wear makeup, but some of my friends have tried to offer makeovers in the past. My 19-year-old sister is the polar opposite of me in almost every way and pays too much attention to her appearance, so she's always bugging me about it.

I can't wear makeup either (unless it's Halloween or something). I can't stand the feel of almost any product on my skin (I'd rather have dry, cracking hands during the winter than use lotion), and I have zero talent for applying it. Plus, I think I look ridiculous in makeup anyway. I say screw it.

I guess most people are just bothered by people who are "different" and don't conform to societal expectations. I don't understand why. It's none of their business. I guess it makes people feel more secure when they know what to expect, so they want people to be "normal." Well, too bad for them, I'm not changing! :P



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11 Jan 2009, 1:17 am

I love it and I hate it. You can guarentee when I goes clothes shopping I will rearrange the whole department. Putting the clothes back on the wrong rack. Shoes all out of thier boxes and all over the floor. I really can't be bothered putting things back where they are meant to go. Last time I went grocery shopping with my daughter I some how knocked a crate full of cococola bottles and they was all laying on the floor fizzing out the top.
I just run around the corner hoping no one saw me.



sheknight
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11 Jan 2009, 1:40 am

BellaDonna wrote:
I love it and I hate it. You can guarentee when I goes clothes shopping I will rearrange the whole department. Putting the clothes back on the wrong rack. Shoes all out of thier boxes and all over the floor. I really can't be bothered putting things back where they are meant to go. Last time I went grocery shopping with my daughter I some how knocked a crate full of cococola bottles and they was all laying on the floor fizzing out the top.
I just run around the corner hoping no one saw me.
:lol: I did that once when my daughter was a toddler. She was able to grab a jar of jelly from a shelf, and she dropped and broke it. I bolted, but I remember hoping she was too young to be influenced by the bad example her mommy had just set!



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11 Jan 2009, 11:20 am

When my daughter was younger she did that too. Nearly every time went to the supermarket she was dropping and smashing things on the floor. She has just stopped sticking her fingers in the plastic covers of the meat packs. She also likes to chain up the aisles and make the thing that moves along to scan your food, stop and start, stop and start. She used to do it with her hand but she worked out another way to. I tell her over and over again to stop but she doesn't. She goes all hype. I think she gets sensory overload in shopping centres. I remember in Myers having to chase her all around the store. She had found a lighter and was running around flicking it. When I got her I stopped her.
I said "We have to go home because you are not doing as you are told" and she burst into tears and wouldn't stop crying.



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11 Jan 2009, 5:12 pm

I hate shopping for clothes too. The strong lights, the noise and being around so many people bothers me so much that I can't wait to get out of there. I never go shopping for clothes unless I absolutely have to. I'm extremely picky on clothes and I tend to like clothes from the men's department more than the women's department. It's not easy to find clothes that fit, are comfortable, look good to me and are appropriate for my work. I usually don't like the latest trends and just want something plain. Shoes are another headache... my feet are so big that they don't usually have female shoes in my size, plus I need the bottom of the shoes to be pretty much flat, due to a physical disability. I also only buy shoes that are comfortable to wear.

Lately I've needed to search for new underwear for myself, as my old ones are getting worn out and ugly. I can't seem to find anything good and I hate the fact that I'm going to have to go to many shops before I find something good.

When I was a kid/teenager I just liked boy clothes. My mother kept trying to find something more girlish for me, but I didn't want any of the stuff she liked. Sometimes I felt bad for her and I hated disappointing her with this all the time, but I just couldn't imagine wearing any of those things she suggested. It was really not my style and not comfortable either.



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12 Jan 2009, 8:50 pm

I buy all my clothes at thrift stores, where I also search for the specific things that I obsessively collect, so technically, I enjoy clothes shopping.
I am very picky about what I wear, and retail stores just don't cut it. Anytime I fork over $$ for something from a retail store, it is often the first thing I end up giving away.

I like the fact that I spent $1.80 on the super-soft black cotton-silk-blend cardigan that has been like a second skin to me since I got it.
I would not find something similar to it for anywhere near $30 even at a less expensive retail store.
I like vintage and home-made clothes too.



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13 Jan 2009, 1:15 pm

I hate clothes shopping too. My mum keeps nagging me about having nice things and tbh it's just not worth it. Changing rooms are the bit I really really really can't stand. I get all panicky and nervous and sick, so generally if I need clothes I go to charity shops, so then if something doesn't fit I can just redonate it.



Shivan
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17 Jan 2009, 5:18 pm

I hate to go shopping for anything. I like to buy on-line, but can't do that with food shopping and stuff like that. What I find odd, is that I love to go to Target. I think I have a Target addiction or something. I need to go there at least once a week and I usually don't buy anything. I never buy clothes there, I do buy just about anything else there though.



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17 Jan 2009, 9:12 pm

i hate clothes shopping as well. i get bugged about my appearance too
one time i wore a blue shirt, 3/4 pants (cropped pants) and black shoes with socks, when i got home my mother and sister acted like i had broken some cardinal rule. apparently wearing 3/4 pants with socks and shoes is a no-no.

i don't get it why people are obsessed by what i wear.



Shivan
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18 Jan 2009, 12:38 pm

tweety_fan wrote:
i hate clothes shopping as well. i get bugged about my appearance too
one time i wore a blue shirt, 3/4 pants (cropped pants) and black shoes with socks, when i got home my mother and sister acted like i had broken some cardinal rule. apparently wearing 3/4 pants with socks and shoes is a no-no.

i don't get it why people are obsessed by what i wear.


Maybe it's an Aspie thing, but I don't get what's wrong with that outfit either. But then, I like to wear white after Labor Day and boots during the summer.....



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18 Jan 2009, 5:55 pm

Uoh... I know that sooo well!

I ever hated clothes shopping, even some decades back with my mom... eeks...
I got so bored, I prefered watching excavators or other interesting things.

Nowadays I go clothes shopping only if really needed, and then buy three or four similar things if available....