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Tortuga
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18 Jan 2009, 6:56 pm

My son wanted to go to church. It was his idea. He was so thrilled about going. We sat in the back row. When the music started, we lasted all of 7 minutes. I found the music to be somewhat loud. He found it to be torture. We left. He wants to try the same church again, only wear his ear defenders next time. I wish his ears weren't so sensitive. Sometimes people make the dumbest comments to us when he's wearing ear defenders. I'll probably talk him into trying a different church that isn't so music-focused.



Marcia
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18 Jan 2009, 7:02 pm

My son has had similar problems with noise, not in church, but when going to see steam trains! :) It's a real shame, all that anticipation of enjoying something, and then it's just too noisy.

Was it organ music? That can be very loud. Perhaps a church with a simple praise band, which can be more mellow and muted, or simply less amplification would be better.

If he can't be persuaded to try another church, then I'd go for the ear defenders. If you found it loud, then chances are that others do as well, and will be sympathetic.

Good luck!



Fnord
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18 Jan 2009, 8:09 pm

Prepare to be ostracized.

It is entirely likely that you and your son will be seen as "obviously" making a statement against Christian music by his use of Ear Defenders. You are likely to receive no sympathy, regardless of how you explain your son's needs. You are likely to be asked if you expect the whole congregation - especially the music ministry - to kow-tow to your demands when "everybody" else likes things the way that they are and "nobody" else is complaining.

I'm not saying that this is going to happen, I'm just saying that you may want to prepare yourselves for it.


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CelticRose
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18 Jan 2009, 9:30 pm

If nothing else, you could try going to a Church of Christ. I grew up in that church, and while I ordinarily wouldn't recommend it to anyone, there is one aspect of their creed that could be helpful to your son. Many Church of Christ congregations do not allow musical instruments in worship. All the singing is a cappella. This varies from congregation to congregation, so you'd want to call ahead and check.


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natesmom
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18 Jan 2009, 10:13 pm

My son is like that, too. We don't go in during the worship time.



Tortuga
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19 Jan 2009, 8:42 am

CelticRose wrote:
Many Church of Christ congregations do not allow musical instruments in worship. All the singing is a cappella. This varies from congregation to congregation, so you'd want to call ahead and check.


That's good to know.



Tortuga
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19 Jan 2009, 8:45 am

Fnord wrote:
Prepare to be ostracized.

It is entirely likely that you and your son will be seen as "obviously" making a statement against Christian music by his use of Ear Defenders. You are likely to receive no sympathy, regardless of how you explain your son's needs. You are likely to be asked if you expect the whole congregation - especially the music ministry - to kow-tow to your demands when "everybody" else likes things the way that they are and "nobody" else is complaining.

I'm not saying that this is going to happen, I'm just saying that you may want to prepare yourselves for it.


Well, I already felt like they had the wrong idea about us because my son was holding his ears shut and couldn't stand up like everyone else was doing and I was sitting as well. Personally, I don't even like to sing at church and I don't. People look at you funny for not singing.



Tortuga
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19 Jan 2009, 8:49 am

Marcia wrote:
Was it organ music? That can be very loud. Perhaps a church with a simple praise band, which can be more mellow and muted, or simply less amplification would be better.

If he can't be persuaded to try another church, then I'd go for the ear defenders. If you found it loud, then chances are that others do as well, and will be sympathetic.

Good luck!


They had a little band with electric bass, electric guitar, keyboard, and drum set. The music wasn't really out there, but it wasn't very good either. I wanted that church to work out for the simple fact that I know they are extremely punctual. Service starts at 10 AM and the whole thing is over by 11 AM. When I was a kid, the church we went to didn't have a set end time and you never knew when it was going to wrap up. I thought he could sit through 1 hour, but the music might end up being the deal breaker.



Fnord
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19 Jan 2009, 11:00 am

Tortuga wrote:
People look at you funny for not singing.

People who attend group events generally tend to judge others badly when those others don't conform to accepted practice (a.k.a., "March in Lock-Step").

You may want to consider another church, as CelticRose suggested.


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CelticRose
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20 Jan 2009, 7:59 am

Tortuga wrote:
I wanted that church to work out for the simple fact that I know they are extremely punctual. Service starts at 10 AM and the whole thing is over by 11 AM. When I was a kid, the church we went to didn't have a set end time and you never knew when it was going to wrap up. I thought he could sit through 1 hour, but the music might end up being the deal breaker.

Well, there's another reason you might want to try the Church of Christ -- the congregation gets very restless if the preacher (don't ever say "pastor" at this church) goes over his time limit. And if he does preach too long, they cut the rest of the service short, particularly the music.


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NovaBat
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20 Jan 2009, 8:54 am

Whatever you do, avoid Episcopal churches. Episcopal churches usually have loud music from my experience. I'm not sure which denomination of church you attended, though.


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