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Hovis
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02 Aug 2010, 1:43 pm

aeon555 wrote:
Hovis wrote:
Jellybean wrote:
By the way, I had deliberaetly put myself in a position to keep away from the glare of the public but she seemed to have made some strange effort to walk in front of me....


Jellybean, this part of your post made me want to ask others here: does anyone else find that even when you try to keep a certain distance from people (random strangers, not people whom you're speaking to), they insist on closing it? Such as, when walking along a very wide pavement - wide enough that fifteen people could walk abreast - no matter how great a space you try to keep between you and someone passing in the opposite direction, they alter their course so that they pass as close to you as possible, sometimes to the degree that you almost brush against each other? And that, if you do manage to maintain the space, they look at you angrily?

I just thought this was very peculiar and wondered if anyone else experiences it.


I can totally relate to this! I haven't managed to work out yet whether it's deliberate so that they force you to change trajectory as a way of asserting dominance or whether they just aren't concentrating on where they're going.


Although I have had a few people who I'm sure did the former, who would have certainly collided with me unless I moved, in the case of most, it just seems that they want to pass you, but at very close range. If you try and keep a distance from them, they don't seem to like it.

It's like people in queues who insist on standing so that they are virtually pressed up against you, and if you try to move a little further away, they just close the gap again.



aeon555
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02 Aug 2010, 2:17 pm

Perhaps it's a form of social communication like the way a shoal of fish all swim together; it's perhaps an unconscious attempt at flocking together to form a single entity?



MotownDangerPants
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02 Aug 2010, 3:07 pm

Yes, never fails. I really can't stand it.



Morgana
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02 Aug 2010, 11:25 pm

Hovis wrote:

It's like people in queues who insist on standing so that they are virtually pressed up against you, and if you try to move a little further away, they just close the gap again.


Interesting that you write about this; I have this experience all the time, and I thought it was *just me*. I dislike it immensely- (I don't like to be touched by random strangers). I also take it personally, because I feel the people are invading my space, so I just assumed that my presence was somehow so minimal that people acted like I wasn't there at all. I also get *run over* a lot with shopping carts and baby strollers.

Oh, and the thing about strangers passing me in the street: I've been bumped into a lot! Unfortunately, I'm smaller than most people, so if I DON'T get out of the way, I'm the one who will be run over.


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PunkyKat
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02 Aug 2010, 11:27 pm

Yes, but I stick my tounge out at them or make faces and that usualy stops them.


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Hodor
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03 Aug 2010, 5:16 pm

People stare at me because they cannot believe how good looking I am 8)

Um...did I just say that? Nah, I don't really get stared at unless I say something stupid in that deep booming voice of mine, as I tend to do when I'm with other people


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Alpacaman
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07 Aug 2010, 11:39 am

whenever i go out people stare at me, either in a hostile threatening way or like they find me amusing. I have long hair, a beard & i dress in a 90s grunge style. this happened twice on monday, and again today. a fat middle aged woman outside a coffee shop was glaring at me which was really uncomfortable. then i went into subway & the emo who worked behind the counter was giving me the evil eye, so i gave him the exact same treatment.

I hate it when random people give me hateful looks, so i just glare at them right back :x



Alpacaman
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07 Aug 2010, 11:39 am

whenever i go out people stare at me, either in a hostile threatening way or like they find me amusing. I have long hair, a beard & i dress in a 90s grunge style. this happened twice on monday, and again today. a fat middle aged woman outside a coffee shop was glaring at me which was really uncomfortable. then i went into subway & the emo who worked behind the counter was giving me the evil eye, so i gave him the exact same treatment.

I hate it when random people give me hateful looks, so i just glare at them right back :x



Sean_91
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07 Aug 2010, 5:19 pm

This happens to me a lot wherever I go. Sometimes, someone may stare at me out of curiosity. But usually, I notice people looking at me like I'm weird or unwelcome. Occasionally, people will glare at me. I usually try to ignore it.



Kiseki
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07 Aug 2010, 6:20 pm

Yes! People stare at me all the time and will randomly approach me and tell me their life stories. I have no idea why. I'm not beautiful and I don't dress crazily or anything.

I've also had acquaintances tell me "You are SO interesting! You're just so cute and unique!" :o But they like barely know me.



Kiseki
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07 Aug 2010, 6:23 pm

dangerCUTE wrote:
I'm stared at constantly...but I'm living in Japan and am one of three foreigners in my entire city.


Where do you live? I live in Osaka. The oyaji are worst. God. They will stare at you to the point where they are swiveling their heads and nearly walking into stuff.



Joe90
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30 Aug 2010, 12:46 pm

I'm worse now than what I've ever been. When I used to walk to school on my own when I was a teenager, I never got any panic attacks thinking about it. Passing people never bothered me. And when I went to college, (which was just about 2 years ago) I still never panicked. I never wondered what other people were thinking of me. Now a days, that is all I think about. Every day now, when I'm out by myself, I think that everyone around me is looking at me and judging me, or laughing at me. They might be thinking, ''whoever is that girl over there?'' or, ''I could tell she is weird'' or, ''look at the way she's standing!'' or, ''she looks a grumpy, miserable cow!''
This is why I can't cope in public any more. I keep on worrying that others are looking at me all the time, and thinking strange things about me. I don't know if it's just me being self-counscious, or if I do stand or walk in a way what makes people laugh at me. But I don't think I do. I stand perfectly still when I'm waiting for a bus or waiting in a queue somewhere. I don't wave my arms about or do anything else to catch people's attention on me, but I still feel like I am doing something strange and I don't know what. One time I even had kids, of about 12, laughing at me and delibrately coming upto me to stare then running back to their friends and laughing. They weren't doing it to no-one else. This made me feel very upset, and hasn't helped my self-esteem. And all I was doing what standing there, with nice hair, a nice handbag, nice clothes, looking all relaxed and ''cool'', waiting for a bus in the bus-station. And what do I get for being normal? I still get teased and mocked. I wouldn't mind if these kids were doing it to everyone around, but when it was just me - I take it so personally.
I wasn't even looking at them. I was just looking at what time the bus would be coming, and then at my bus timetable, and then just looking around at others around me. I was standing just like everyone else, no stimming, no pulling faces, no humming - just another ordinary person. I couldn't have stood out, even if I tried. So I don't know what made these horrible kids take the piss out of me. Each time one went upto me, I just glanced quickly at them, (still looking relaxed and not-bothered,) and I did notice it was looking at me grinning in a piss-taking way, then it ran back to it's friends. I looked away from them and pretended to just ignore them, but then another ran upto me and giggled horribly. And from the corner of my eye (I had sunglasses on too, so they couldn't see who I was looking at without turning my head), I didn't see them doing that to anyone else around.

So what the f**k was I doing wrong?????? Then everyone wonders why I don't like being out in the street on my own. And it's no good saying ''they're just kids, don't be offended by them'', because these kids wouldn't be doing it for nothing, because they weren't doing it to anyone else there. And most girls of their age can usually sense when someone's a bit weird (although I wasn't doing one thing to make me even seem weird).

Perhaps I had a sticker on my forehead saying, ''I'm weird - take the piss out of me, everyone!''



ManErg
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30 Aug 2010, 1:43 pm

People can be so awful sometimes. :( You´re not the one who is weird, THEY`RE weird for treating people the way they do.


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spongy
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30 Aug 2010, 2:36 pm

People stare at me every now and then.

Lately the situation has improved since I became social(or I found a small group of asocial who hadf gathered in order to look social enough for others to leave them alone).

When I was younger I avoided eye contact with those who stared at me, I was a wuss I know.

Lately I stare at them back and wave and it helps getting rid of those who stare at me.



Coldkick
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30 Aug 2010, 4:02 pm

Yes, people do stare at me sometimes and I have acute hearing and I can hear my name clearly if someone says it and I look directly towards them, they just look surprised I heard them and turn away.



Wobbuffet
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30 Aug 2010, 4:35 pm

Haha! I thought this was just me. :?

I get it loads when I go to the city. I'll be walking up the street and I'll keep seeing people staring at me...not like they're laughing at me or something, they're looking the way someone would look if they just saw a celebrity when they really weren't expecting it.

I don't think I'm very good-looking, so maybe I just look like some small-time sports player or something. :P