Page 6 of 8 [ 124 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1 ... 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8  Next

EquiisSavant
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 4 Feb 2010
Age: 64
Gender: Female
Posts: 51

06 Feb 2010, 7:44 am

I suppose for me, it depends on what I'm doing. I have a very messed up foot that supposedly has needed surgery for about 2 years, and I don't have access. Also, I got a TBI two years ago, one of many, and left hemiparesis.

If I'm trying to walk. I hobble about a lot. But, I have an Autism horse, and grooming him has strengthened the left hemiparesis, though not the pain levels.

However, I also vigorously ride my Autism horse, and when I'm mounted, I don't feel a day over 20. But that's only because I am getting my fitness back (after the TBI - took a long time). My Autism horse stands when I mount, and bows to help me slide off without jamming my injured foot, but once I'm on, no problems.

Also, people tend to think I'm ancient when I'm hobbling around. But when I'm riding, twenty & thirty year olds tell me I ride better than them, and ask me to ride and train their horses.

So it pretty much depends in what I'm doing.



ed78
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 1 Feb 2010
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 7
Location: Washington, DC...ish

06 Feb 2010, 9:21 pm

AspieInTraining wrote:
In my opinion, age 17 does seem like too young to get married, even for a neurotypical person who has great social skills and a level of maturity consistent with his or her age. But for an aspie, who has a maturity level of less than his or her age, it seems especially young. However, marriage at age 17 might be the right thing to do for some couples (especially if the couple has conceived a child prior to their marriage, and they want the child to be born into a good family, with a married mother and father). I'm not saying that Ed78 made a wrong choice by marrying so young (it might have been the right thing to do, given his circumstances). But the reason he is an "exception" to my theory (about the number of milestones affecting the chronological age he feels) may be due to the young age at which he married and started having children. For many people, graduation from high school, then graduation from college are milestones which help them gain the maturity necessary to be a mature and responsible adult after marriage. During college, they live away from home and learn to be independent (without constant supervision from parents) and learn to get along with same-gender roommates. Then, after college (and maybe after a few years of employment experience), they get married (usually between the ages of 20 and 30), with the maturity to be a good spouse and parent. In Ed78's situation, even though he did get his bachelor's degree later, after marriage and children, he did not have the prior experience of independent living and learning to relate to same-gender roommates, which may have helped him to enter marriage with a higher maturity level (a level where he would have felt older). The milestone of earning a college degree (after marriage and children) could have helped him to feel a little older, but perhaps (with the simultaneous responsibilities of a wife and children) he did not gain the maturing benefits of this milestone as much as he might have, if he had attended and graduated from college prior to marriage. That's my theory, anyway. How about it aspies? What do you think? :)


I think you nailed it! This is what I always say; my wife for some reason doesn't always want to agree with me, but I say that there is much value in being "single" and responsible for yourself as an independent adult before getting married. I would never support my children, for example, doing what I did. I totally agree that the maturing process needs to take its course through the milestones you outlined in the right order! to gain the full benefit. My college degree didn't even "feel" the same when I got it (I don't think), because it was so non-traditional, like I'd already been working in the field for over 10 years, it wasn't like I was about the "embark on a great adventure" or whatever they normally say at college graduations. Thanks for the thoughtful response.



Wogar
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 14 Nov 2009
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 103
Location: Canada

17 Feb 2010, 1:22 pm

Being 30, I feel about 20. I also look about 16, I've been told. 8)



BLK95TA
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 11 Feb 2010
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 121

17 Feb 2010, 3:16 pm

I'm 30 but i feel older sometimes but then i look at my place in life and i'm living like i'm about 16-18

This thread reminds me of this blink 182 song :lol:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ui577_AuRfI[/youtube]



alana
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Dec 2009
Age: 52
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,015

17 Feb 2010, 8:41 pm

in some ways yes and in some ways I was born about 45.

I think I do act and talk younger sometimes and then I can switch and be very clinical and cold sounding, when I am processing stuff through. I don't try to censor myself anymore, I just let whichever aspect out that I feel like at the moment. I do believe this is a developmental disability...because things have taken sooooooooo long to become clear to me which other people seemed to 'get' at like 20 or 25. And I'll have had the same revelation at 35 and be like 'oh', this is how they knew how to handle that situation, or whatever.



MONKEY
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Jan 2009
Age: 28
Gender: Female
Posts: 9,896
Location: Stoke, England (sometimes :P)

03 Mar 2010, 6:32 pm

I have always wanted to be seen as an adult for as long as I can remember but I have never even got close because I'm behind a few years emotionally, physically I'm a young adult but inside I'm anywhere between 11-14 (it can go to about 8 when I have tantrums in the house because I scream and everything.) And it makes me really frustrated, I just want to be mature and react to things in a way a young adult should but I'm not allowed because my mind won't let me and I have to be childish about everything. My friends are mostly younger than me and I'm more attracted to boys that are a few months-2 years younger than me.
When I was younger I would strive to look like an adult and I was basically obsessed with the idea of being grown up. That's basically impossible when I had explosive tantrums in public until I was in my early teens (now they're less obvious and frequent and it usually consists of me getting teary eyed and being defiant or saying the same thing over and over with an angry voice). I watched tv programmes that were meant for kids a lot younger than me. Played with dolls until I was 14-ish and still do now occasionally. Walk behind people like an obediant little puppy when I'm out and let them lead the way (still do). And a bunch of other things. I sometimes look up to people who are the same age as me as grown ups and see them as being really cool in their grown up high heels and smart clothes, I almost want to be looked after by them I know it sounds crazy but it's true
I've kind of learned to accept it now and will wait patiently until I'm mature enough to call myself an adult mentally and not just chronologically and physically. But for the meantime I'll have to make the most of my childlike personality and say atleast I will stay youthful for longer!


_________________
What film do atheists watch on Christmas?
Coincidence on 34th street.


willmark
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 13 May 2009
Age: 70
Gender: Male
Posts: 571

04 Mar 2010, 9:54 am

MONKEY wrote:
I have always wanted to be seen as an adult for as long as I can remember but I have never even got close because I'm behind a few years emotionally, physically I'm a young adult but inside I'm anywhere between 11-14 (it can go to about 8 when I have tantrums in the house because I scream and everything.) And it makes me really frustrated, I just want to be mature and react to things in a way a young adult should but I'm not allowed because my mind won't let me and I have to be childish about everything. My friends are mostly younger than me and I'm more attracted to boys that are a few months-2 years younger than me.
When I was younger I would strive to look like an adult and I was basically obsessed with the idea of being grown up. That's basically impossible when I had explosive tantrums in public until I was in my early teens (now they're less obvious and frequent and it usually consists of me getting teary eyed and being defiant or saying the same thing over and over with an angry voice). I watched tv programmes that were meant for kids a lot younger than me. Played with dolls until I was 14-ish and still do now occasionally. Walk behind people like an obediant little puppy when I'm out and let them lead the way (still do). And a bunch of other things. I sometimes look up to people who are the same age as me as grown ups and see them as being really cool in their grown up high heels and smart clothes, I almost want to be looked after by them I know it sounds crazy but it's true
I've kind of learned to accept it now and will wait patiently until I'm mature enough to call myself an adult mentally and not just chronologically and physically. But for the meantime I'll have to make the most of my childlike personality and say atleast I will stay youthful for longer!

Hey. You're 17. It's allowed at 17 to not feel mature. Many 17 year olds are convinced that they are mature when in fact they're not. When I was 17 I didn't think I was ready to go out and face the world on my own either. Shoot adolescence didn't even start for me until I was almost 16. I remember how children loved me, and I felt like I was a very tall child myself. I don't think you have anything to worry about, though it may seem like it sometimes. You'll get there when you're ready.



haruka
Blue Jay
Blue Jay

User avatar

Joined: 14 Mar 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 83
Location: Canada

17 Mar 2010, 11:36 am

i feel old in the sense that i feel more mature than most my age, or perhaps a better way to put it is concerned with more mature issues, therefore cannot help have a leg up in terms of maturity.

but at the same time, i feel very young. i feel like life started once i stopped "acting" with others... once i started to break off with individuals who and organizations that didn't help my sanity. i feel like that is when i started living. i also feel like i missed childhood in a lot of ways and i make up for it now by not being a typical 33 year old and being very "immature" in a lot of ways.

so really, it depends a lot on the parameters and opinions /definitions of mature/immature, young/old.



FredOak3
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 8 Mar 2010
Age: 66
Gender: Male
Posts: 227

18 Mar 2010, 10:22 am

As long as I keep my head shaved most people think I'm 10 years younger then I am.
When I'm with my kids people will ask them is that your dad but If I let the gray grow out on the sides they'll say is that your grandfather. Peoples perceptions are weird, and they say we look at thing differently.

But I bike commute to work 2-4 days a week year round (16 miles RT) and ride on week-ends and with having boys 5,10 and 11, I need to be able to keep up with them.



AspieInTraining
Butterfly
Butterfly

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jan 2010
Age: 64
Gender: Female
Posts: 15

18 Mar 2010, 11:06 am

FredOak3 wrote:
As long as I keep my head shaved most people think I'm 10 years younger then I am.
When I'm with my kids people will ask them is that your dad but If I let the gray grow out on the sides they'll say is that your grandfather. Peoples perceptions are weird, and they say we look at thing differently.

But I bike commute to work 2-4 days a week year round (16 miles RT) and ride on week-ends and with having boys 5,10 and 11, I need to be able to keep up with them.


People tell me that I look younger than my age (but not because I shave my head, since I'm a woman :wink: ). The beautician I visit every four months to get a haircut and a permanent says I'm lucky to have blonde hair (which doesn't go gray). I think my young-looking hair contributes to how young I look and feel. Since my beautician is my niece, she also does my sister-in-law's hair. This sister-in-law, Annette, who is about six months younger than me, is a brunette, and my niece has been coloring her gray hair for years! Because Annette has six children and several grandchildren, she seems older than me, probably because of the maturing experiences she has had while raising her children (while my husband and I have no children, by choice).

I don't hate children, but being around children is stressful for me, perhaps because I was teased relentlessly by other children when I was a child. So now, when I see children acting rude or teasing other children (or sometimes even teasing me), it reminds me of the way I was treated as a child, and I feel upset at the children I see acting this way (even though they are not the same children who teased me when I was a child). It seems strange that I feel this way. I realize that I should let go of the past and let go of my bad childhood memories, but when I see children misbehaving, all the bad memories come flooding back. That's one of the reasons I chose not to have children; I was afraid that if I had children of my own, I might mistreat them when they caused me this type of stress (although I would never want to hurt or abuse anyone, especially not a child). Maybe these types of feelings are a consequence of being an aspie, but I haven't read about any other aspies on this forum felling this way. If you are an aspie and have similar feelings of stress concerning children, I'd like to hear about your feelings and experiences. :?



Autumnsteps
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 13 Feb 2010
Age: 41
Gender: Female
Posts: 460
Location: Uk

18 Mar 2010, 11:15 am

In some ways I feel old, so old but in others I feel young



hartzofspace
Supporting Member
Supporting Member

User avatar

Joined: 14 Apr 2005
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,138
Location: On the Road Less Traveled

18 Mar 2010, 12:51 pm

AspieInTraining wrote:
I don't hate children, but being around children is stressful for me, perhaps because I was teased relentlessly by other children when I was a child. So now, when I see children acting rude or teasing other children (or sometimes even teasing me), it reminds me of the way I was treated as a child, and I feel upset at the children I see acting this way (even though they are not the same children who teased me when I was a child). It seems strange that I feel this way. I realize that I should let go of the past and let go of my bad childhood memories, but when I see children misbehaving, all the bad memories come flooding back. That's one of the reasons I chose not to have children; I was afraid that if I had children of my own, I might mistreat them when they caused me this type of stress (although I would never want to hurt or abuse anyone, especially not a child). Maybe these types of feelings are a consequence of being an aspie, but I haven't read about any other aspies on this forum felling this way. If you are an aspie and have similar feelings of stress concerning children, I'd like to hear about your feelings and experiences. :?

I have seen other posts on this forum, where Aspies feel this way, too. Sometimes, even now, when I walk down a street filled with schoolchildren, I get a knot of dread in my middle, and my heart rate goes up. I was teased and tormented in the schoolyard, as a child. I had some really brutal experiences with other children. So, I don't think it's a matter of letting memories go - I think that these memories are imprinted for life! :? But I am glad to say that I had one child, and I thoroughly enjoyed raising her. We "played" together a lot, when she was in grade school. I also encouraged her to give back as good as she got, if any child got physical with her. 8)


_________________
Dreams are renewable. No matter what our age or condition, there are still untapped possibilities within us and new beauty waiting to be born.
-- Dr. Dale Turner


UberSneakyPanda
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 5 Apr 2010
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 35
Location: Silicon Valley Area, Ca

08 Apr 2010, 12:03 am

Like others have said both really. In some ways I am and have far beyond many of my peers to put an age on it is tough. In other ways I am about 16 or so at best.


_________________
Once I was considered a rock star in the world of aspiring Mathematicians, now....


agape
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

User avatar

Joined: 12 Apr 2010
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 7

16 Apr 2010, 9:59 am

I've always been more mature for my age, especially as a kid, but i don't think i'll ever feel "grown up". As a kid i never wanted to grow up and as an adult i still look like a teen. I'm also not afraid to embrace my inner child. I still enjoy doing many of the things i did as a kid. But then again, my interests as a kid were pretty boring.

I feel it's inaccurate that most of society gauges maturity on whether or not you do normal "adult" things like getting married and having kids. Even teenagers can do these things, and i actually find most adults extremely irresponsible (not that i find kids/teens any less irresponsible), and yet they feel very grown up.

Really, age is meaningless. It's all a matter of the wisdom you gain from your life, however long you've been living it or however young or old you feel. :)



Unico
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 22 Jul 2004
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 194
Location: Glen Ellyn, Illinois, USA

20 Apr 2010, 6:28 pm

I also generally feel much younger than my real age (27), and sometimes don't feel like any age at all.



Tim_Tex
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Jul 2004
Age: 41
Gender: Male
Posts: 42,545
Location: Houston, Texas

20 Apr 2010, 6:59 pm

I am the opposite. I feel a lot older (I'm chronogically 30).


_________________
Who’s better at math than a robot? They’re made of math!