Question about non-verbal expression for NT.

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So I've noticed that during extreme cases on an emotional spectrum that my facial expression tends to fit the mood without my being conscious about it. In other words, when something makes me really happy the right side of my face lifts unconsciously every time. When REALLY upset or bitter I frown, and when I see a girl who I find very attractive my eyes apparently get " softer " looking according to my ex-girlfriend. I even played around with the eye reaction to seeing her face and was blown away by how I had no control over it. (Edit: By " played around " I mean that I would look away, then look back and feel it happen, and repeat that, then try to go back to my normal face without forcing it and couldn't. )

What I'm wondering now is if that's actually how it is supposed to be for most people? What I mean is... is it considered normal for your reactions to just " happen " like that? From tone of voice, body language, facial expression, etc? To the point where you have no control over it without extreme effort and you have basically no awareness?

Last edited by Ntstanch on 05 Apr 2009, 7:17 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Yes, that is supposed to be perfectly normal. I experience that as well; that is, flat expression during the 'normal' range of emotions, and expressive face during 'intense' emotions.

Thats really hard to comprehend for me... it seems like that if you flipped on a normal switch in my brain all that would happen is I would start to feel an overwhelming amount of emotion and panic because my face forcibly reacts by itself to crap. Imagine having that happen in a party scenario. Every person you look at, based on how they appear non-verbally alters your non-verbal expressions subconsciously. How the hell did I go 21 years not knowing any of this?

Oh wow, that can be a bit freaky now that I think about it.

Well, I would think one could go easily being unaware of such a thing because you are not looking at your own face constantly! How would you know what you cannot see and barely feel?

True... you can also add in the preference for solitude/internet communication opposed to face to face... and also just thinking that you were feeling whats normal and expressing whats normal. Considering that I've put in a decent effort to fit in after I had some weird breakdown in 6th grade and withdrew totally for three years. I studied and even practiced expressing certain ranges of expressions figuring that they were learned in time. Which helped... but I can only take it so far. Acting all day to everyone is draining as hell.

Where are the NT people anyway? I'd really like more info on this, but I don't feel comfortable asking my friends... seems like it might come off as a " psycho " question.