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LePetitPrince
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18 Apr 2009, 4:52 pm

I am starting to see that I might be slightly asexual (I am male) without even realizing it , I am not sure if such thing exists since one would be either asexual or not.

- Since I was teen at school , I was never so 'crazy' about girls , that means that I never involuntary or voluntary made any gestures when a hot girl pass by, I was always the only one who doesn't react among a bunch of guys, sometimes I don't even notice for what they are making all these gestures and sounds.

-I never felt the 'need' that I should lose my virginity, I was been invited by colleagues(males) during college to go to Brothels/nudity clubs , yet I never went with them. I am atheist ,and I don't believe doing this is wrong and I don't believe that sex for entertainment is a 'sin' that would take me to hell, yet I never felt the urge or the need to go to such 'activity' nor I felt it would be my kind of place.

-Unlike many guys, I never post bikini/hot girls pictures as my Desktop's or my phone's wallpaper nor I put such pic/callenders in my room. I was never interested in looking at some hot celebs' pictures.

- Adult and sex topics usually don't really interest me.

- Talking about 'hotties' with guys doesn't really interest me.


On the other hand I do watch porn and I do the ...ehem...the little dirty thing just some kinda of a relief, but that's all and once it's done , it's done.

So is there something called 'Slightly asexual" anyways?



Last edited by LePetitPrince on 19 Apr 2009, 6:37 am, edited 1 time in total.

MissConstrue
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18 Apr 2009, 5:08 pm

The need to lose virginity is what I more or less call social constructs made in society.

I never did either.

The rest here almost sounds similar in my cases but I have always been very self conscious even when it came to telling anyone who I was attracted to. I think for me, I tend to seperate the social with the sexual. But I'm slowly growing out of that a little I think.

I don't know, maybe you might be a tad asexual. Some asexuals claim they have romantic tendencies. So who knows.

I think mine were just a list of insecurities and not being able to express them openly like NTs. That's the first time I compared myself to NTs because I also had many of these problems.

Asexuality does seem to be common for those on the spectrum.


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jbinion
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18 Apr 2009, 5:24 pm

LePetitPrince wrote:
I am starting to see that I might be slightly asexual (I am male) without even realizing it , I am not sure if such thing exists since one would be either asexual or not.

- Since I was teen at school , I was never so 'crazy' about girls , that means that when I never involuntary or voluntary made any gestures when a hot girl pass by, I was always the only one who doesn't react among a bunch of guys, sometimes I don't even notice for what they are making all these gestures and sounds.

-I never felt the 'need' that I should lose my virginity, I was been invited by colleagues(males) during college to go to Brothels/nudity clubs , yet I never went with them. I am atheist ,and I don't believe doing this is wrong and I don't believe that sex for entertainment is a 'sin' that would take me to hell, yet I never felt the urge or the need to go to such 'activity' nor I felt it would be my kind of place.

-Unlike many guys, I never post bikini/hot girls pictures as my Desktop's or my phone's wallpaper nor I put such pic/callenders in my room. I was never interested in looking at some hot celebs' pictures.

- Adult and sex topics usually don't really interest me.

- Talking about 'hotties' with guys doesn't really interest me.


On the other hand I do watch porn and I do the ...ehem...the little dirty thing just some kinda of a relief, but that's all and once it's done , it's done.

So is there something called 'Slightly asexual" anyways?


I don't call it asexual, I call it "Blessed" you are blessed. I wish i could be like that, then my life would be easier and I wont have to worry about girls. But on the other hand, you are slightly asexual, because lol in spanish "masturbates" and look at porn, but you dont worry about the other stuff. i dont know why you are like this, it may have something to do with asperger's or you may just be that way. It would be great to be like that though, especially in a society that is so closed minded



Peko
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18 Apr 2009, 6:32 pm

That sounds almost exactly like me 8O ! I have no physical desire to be w/ anyone (though I have tried to manifest it to feel "normal"/does not work)

Except a few details make my case different:
1. I am a girl
2. I only like yaoi (guy x guy) anime's that equate to a specific type of porn (I'm picky)
3. I do not masturbate b/c I do not experience physical pleasure at all in the sexual sense (that I am aware of)
Cont'd- not willing to try masturbating b/c every time I have had "casual/close physical contact" w/ someone else, I've experienced physical pain & panic attacks.
Not against sex & masturbating
4. Though I do believe in a higher power (God)-not in the traditional "male god" sense.

p.s. You gave me an idea for a blog/post-thanks :D
Sample- I experience (as I said b4) pain from casual/"normal" contact & things that cause pain traditionally for me hurt than cause numbness, just make me numb right away, or feel good (being hit really hard on my back, scratching myself on my arms pretty hard type stuff)



LePetitPrince
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19 Apr 2009, 7:34 am

Peko wrote:
That sounds almost exactly like me 8O ! I have no physical desire to be w/ anyone (though I have tried to manifest it to feel "normal"/does not work)

Except a few details make my case different:
1. I am a girl
2. I only like yaoi (guy x guy) anime's that equate to a specific type of porn (I'm picky)
3. I do not masturbate b/c I do not experience physical pleasure at all in the sexual sense (that I am aware of)
Cont'd- not willing to try masturbating b/c every time I have had "casual/close physical contact" w/ someone else, I've experienced physical pain & panic attacks.
Not against sex & masturbating
4. Though I do believe in a higher power (God)-not in the traditional "male god" sense.

p.s. You gave me an idea for a blog/post-thanks :D
Sample- I experience (as I said b4) pain from casual/"normal" contact & things that cause pain traditionally for me hurt than cause numbness, just make me numb right away, or feel good (being hit really hard on my back, scratching myself on my arms pretty hard type stuff)


Can't tell about that kind of "pain" because I never did such physical contact in the sexual sense even tho I am sensitive to sudden touch . I don't have 'hard hitting' fetishes like yours.



LePetitPrince
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19 Apr 2009, 7:36 am

jbinion wrote:
LePetitPrince wrote:
I am starting to see that I might be slightly asexual (I am male) without even realizing it , I am not sure if such thing exists since one would be either asexual or not.

- Since I was teen at school , I was never so 'crazy' about girls , that means that when I never involuntary or voluntary made any gestures when a hot girl pass by, I was always the only one who doesn't react among a bunch of guys, sometimes I don't even notice for what they are making all these gestures and sounds.

-I never felt the 'need' that I should lose my virginity, I was been invited by colleagues(males) during college to go to Brothels/nudity clubs , yet I never went with them. I am atheist ,and I don't believe doing this is wrong and I don't believe that sex for entertainment is a 'sin' that would take me to hell, yet I never felt the urge or the need to go to such 'activity' nor I felt it would be my kind of place.

-Unlike many guys, I never post bikini/hot girls pictures as my Desktop's or my phone's wallpaper nor I put such pic/callenders in my room. I was never interested in looking at some hot celebs' pictures.

- Adult and sex topics usually don't really interest me.

- Talking about 'hotties' with guys doesn't really interest me.


On the other hand I do watch porn and I do the ...ehem...the little dirty thing just some kinda of a relief, but that's all and once it's done , it's done.

So is there something called 'Slightly asexual" anyways?


I don't call it asexual, I call it "Blessed" you are blessed. I wish i could be like that, then my life would be easier and I wont have to worry about girls. But on the other hand, you are slightly asexual, because lol in spanish "masturbates" and look at porn, but you dont worry about the other stuff. i dont know why you are like this, it may have something to do with asperger's or you may just be that way. It would be great to be like that though, especially in a society that is so closed minded


Not actually 'blessed' since I feel that the lack of romance in my life is a ...lack. But yea I guess this does help to live without it.



sjamaan
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19 Apr 2009, 8:02 am

Your description sounds a lot like me, too. I wonder if there really is such a thing as "slightly" (or "mostly") asexual.

Perhaps this is just called "a low sex drive"?



Hector
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19 Apr 2009, 8:33 am

What is described in the OP doesn't strike me so much as being asexuality as it does mere nonconformism.



ZEGH8578
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19 Apr 2009, 9:04 am

Hector wrote:
What is described in the OP doesn't strike me so much as being asexuality as it does mere nonconformism.


i think so too.

when im out w guys, they will point at ANYTHING that has boobs, and start to nudge at each others and stuff "did you seeee that aaaaass!"

i will go something along the lines of "yes, i saw that ass, and the other fifteen thousand asses that surround us, in this part of town, right now... "

i dont pursuit chicks, i dont do dating, i never really wanted to go date and stuff but i wont say _asexual_

for example
i'd totally do my 'milf' socialworker, if she should suddenly decide to throw herself at me for no apparent reason, and i wouldnt even be nervous about it 8)


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19 Apr 2009, 9:31 am

If no-one is attracted to you when you are younger, then you become scarred, and learn NOT to become sexually attracted to them. Eventually your mind learns to automatically convert physical attraction to hatred and contempt. And even if you do get into a relationship at a later age, your sex drive is all gone.



Last edited by BPalmer on 19 Apr 2009, 10:38 am, edited 1 time in total.

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19 Apr 2009, 10:08 am

Maybe a need for a sexual relationship is similar to the need for friendship.

I can do for weeks without meeting a friend. But on certain moments I need a friend to be with or to talk to. So there is an occasional need for friendship, but not a permanent one.



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19 Apr 2009, 11:20 am

i have a slight issue with this...ive noticed that lately (the last few years) i have become less and less sexual... but at the same time i do want sex...

my problem has been that the girls ive met this last year all want sex right away, and at the time i meet them i feel turned on, but when we are in the act its like my body isnt enjoying it as much as it did the idea and so i get turned off...which really hurt my self-esteem as i thought there was something wrong with me...and the girls i meet get very confused...and i think it also hurts them...

now i am at a loss as i dont know what to do, could it be that i get too nervous and so my blood flow retracts into my inner organs as with anxiety, or am i just realizing my asexuality?

however i do watch porn and such things without much problems.... meh.. i am doomed...

i have this girl ive just met whom i like and she basically told me she wants to have sex with me, and the very idea freaks me out and i think i will have to end this whole thing without trying as i would feel so bad if it turned out that i dont get turned on.....then i just get more and more stressed..-. its like the ultimate performance anxiety....

anyone got advice.....should i stop dating all together?



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19 Apr 2009, 5:34 pm

I'm the same way; when I was in school, I never wanted a girlfriend(still don't had one), I was not interested in any "adult content" that a lot of people at my school were interested in and certainly had no desire to have sex with anyone(I still don't). I consider myself about 50% asexual. I may want a girlfriend as a companion someday but if we never had sex, I'd be able to live with that. I don't know if she would though.



hermanChess
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19 Apr 2009, 8:13 pm

Do you masturbate? Because if you do it means you still have that urge. Actually I'm the same as you, I realized "normal" guys are always interested in having some sort of success with girls, Im like this kid who doesn't understand this, that's why they exclude me in their girls conversation, because I guess they think I don't have anything valuable to say. The thing is, I guess girls are used to be seduced, so when this guy (me) just wants to have an interesting conversation and not show any sexual interest they must think I'm gay or something, in fact some girls have mentioned I must be gay, though I'm not.



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19 Apr 2009, 8:37 pm

Very similar here too, except for the porn and masturbation thing.

That said I DO posess porn. I just don't look at it to get myself off. It mainly serves the purpose of being able to show the guys at a LAN party that yeah, I do have porn, and yes, you can share it. I masturbate twice a week though so I don't get nocturnal emissions. To expediate such sessions I do imagine women in provocative actions or poses so I guess that means I am just a plain ol' heterosexual.

Could be wrong though, but I definitely like the idea of having a girlfriend. So I'm gonna stick with "not asexual" because while I don't like being touched, I like the idea of touching.