Always end up with the same ethnicity?

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CaptainTrips222
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15 May 2009, 1:03 am

Hey, I haven't had that many women to be honest, but I've only date Filipino and native American women, and one mexican. I'm none of those ethnic backgrounds! I think what it is, girls from the filipinnes are raised more respectful, and native girls are so laid back they can over look my eccentricities. I know personality has nothing to do with that kinda thing, but that's how it seems.



Tahitiii
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15 May 2009, 3:14 am

Maybe it's just the fact that they're from a significantly different culture, and it doesn't matter what culture.



Darrenj777
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15 May 2009, 9:06 am

yeah i thought about that. ive only dated Japanese, thai, chinese and taiwanese girls mainly.... ive only had out of 15 partners two who was the same race as me... i never felt comfortbale around most english girls, excpet aspie ones.. english ppl in general are very cynical and very critical.

I think its because if your aspie you feel on the outside and foreigners are also on the outside in some repsectrs so its easy to indentify with. i think also perhaps it means people make more alloweness for our behaviour as its less familar and less obvious that were different as your both not of the same culture. also i think perhaps its easier to communciate as its less complex and perhaps more honest and more non verbal, less games...

its good for the Gene pool so keep it up!! :D



billsmithglendale
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15 May 2009, 1:19 pm

I only dated those of Chinese decent (sometimes mixed with other Asian decent) before my wife, who is massively mixed Latina and other things, but looks Asian.

I don't know if it's so much of a cultural thing, since several of those cases were with women whose families had lived here for several generations and who were totally integrated into American culture, with no sign of the old culture in the family (nor did they speak the old tongue).

I think certain women tend to like certain kinds of guys, and this happens on an ethnic level as well, probably based on some kind of genetic basis. I've noticed that Chinese and Chinese decent women, Vietnamese, and Filipina tend to like me, as well as Latina and some black women. White women, not quite as much, unless they are bigger/plump/tall. Something about me being tall, blonde, turns them on, dunno what.

Controversial observation below --

I've noticed that in Black male/ White female couples, the women tend to be a bit on the masculine/high testosterone side -- big chins, taller, more aggressive, obviously showing signs of higher testosterone levels in their development. I don't know if maybe there are also other aspects of choice involved (maybe white men tend to shy away from women like this, so they go for who goes for them), but that's just my somewhat controversial observation.

Let's not be naive and say that racial politics don't play into interracial relationships -- for various reasons, certain ethnicities make good "trophies", as mates, and there is an overall tendency to prefer light skin over dark (though I'm so light, I actually prefer dark in many cases, like with Black women).



jemir1234
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15 May 2009, 3:46 pm

lol as much as I think Latinas don't like me...if i ever get a girlfriend which is always ages...it's a latina..i dont know why, but please guys dont stereotype these native american women and latinas and so forth as if they are loving queens. Like any girls...many are just as nasty as the other. Although ever native american girl i met was nice, and there was this one who always approached me and she was gorgeous. I have her phone number in my yearbook til this day. She treated me like a human being, not like a weirdo creep.

But those mean girls always come back around when you become cooler, older, or get more money, but by then we wont even want them anyways. :)



protest_the_hero
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15 May 2009, 7:11 pm

Are you sure you haven't only been with three women? One philipino, one native and one mexican?



CaptainTrips222
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15 May 2009, 10:19 pm

A few points were raised that I agree with; that perhaps because they're from an outside culture, they're less likely to notice the where I'm "off," and also because certain races are physically attracted to other races, on average. Good deal, and maybe so. It's happened often enough now that I'm not so sure it's just coincidence.

And it's good that others notice this.



billsmithglendale
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16 May 2009, 11:53 am

I asked one of the foreign ones I had as a fling (rich Taiwanese girl with huge implants, I kid you not) what the deal was, why it always seemed to be girls of Chinese decent. She said it was because I was some kind of "typical hunk" :P I think certain Asian girls (not all by far) are attracted to the relatively higher degree of masculinity in white men, and blonde hair (in my case) is also a rarity there.

Here's the thing for both genders, there's a sliding scale at work. For women, Asian women tend to be the most "feminine", with the scale sliding down to where black women tend to not be viewed as feminine in this culture. Same goes for men -- black men tend to be at the top of the masculinity scale (muscularity, bone structure) but a lot of cultures have issues with dating black men, so the next on the list, white men, tend to be the default as being at the top of the masculinity scale. Unfortunately, Asians and Indians don't tend to be viewed as very masculine, though there are of course exceptions. This leads to situations where some Asian men (and not all, because it's not just about this) have a problem dating in Western countries, and meanwhile, see Asian women having no such problem. They get very angry about this -- you can find the angry asian male forum on the web, called the "Fighting 44's". This is pretty much their biggest complaint, or one of them.



Fudo
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16 May 2009, 12:19 pm

i don't "end up" with any particular ethnicity.. just alone :( poor me lol



Tahitiii
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16 May 2009, 4:01 pm

billsmithglendale wrote:
...feminine...masculine...
Nothing's that simple. If you're talking pure instinct, masculine would be big and strong (protector/provider) while feminine would be about procreation potential: Narrow waist (not yet pregnant) wide hips (able to deliver) clear, bright eyes (generally healthy).

Then comes individual quirks -- I associate certain facial features with intelligence or stupidity, and make the irrational connection that intelligence = money = power. Don't ask me to defend that position.

Then comes culture, which naturally changes with time and location.

Then comes the crap the media tells you to believe. Like that year when the only stuff you were allowed to by was ugly brown sweaters.... And the misfits who refuse to throw stuff away just because Madison Ave says so... If you're ever curious as to what real people look like, turn off the TV and go to the grocery store. It's like a whole nother species.



billsmithglendale
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16 May 2009, 7:27 pm

Tahitiii wrote:
billsmithglendale wrote:
...feminine...masculine...
Nothing's that simple. If you're talking pure instinct, masculine would be big and strong (protector/provider) while feminine would be about procreation potential: Narrow waist (not yet pregnant) wide hips (able to deliver) clear, bright eyes (generally healthy).

Then comes individual quirks -- I associate certain facial features with intelligence or stupidity, and make the irrational connection that intelligence = money = power. Don't ask me to defend that position.

Then comes culture, which naturally changes with time and location.

Then comes the crap the media tells you to believe. Like that year when the only stuff you were allowed to by was ugly brown sweaters.... And the misfits who refuse to throw stuff away just because Madison Ave says so... If you're ever curious as to what real people look like, turn off the TV and go to the grocery store. It's like a whole nother species.


Your mileage may vary, and tastes are individual, but there are some pretty good reasons for why white male/asian female is such a common interracial couple, especially on the West coast. Some of them are socio-economic, but for many men, feminine is just being smaller than a normal man and having non-male features. True, a lot of asian women don't have broad hips, but a lot are very petite, have small bone structure, and are relatively hairless on their body (I know some that don't even have to shave their legs).



Keeno
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16 May 2009, 8:01 pm

It's only online that I have been able to make deep connections with women but on that basis.... it's been the American South with me.



CaptainTrips222
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17 May 2009, 2:38 am

Keeno wrote:
It's only online that I have been able to make deep connections with women but on that basis.... it's been the American South with me.


How do you mean?



Keeno
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17 May 2009, 8:28 am

Southern states of the US - think Bible Belt, or what was the Confederate states. Women who were willing to become friends with me online had a strong tendency to come from this one region. I've been curious as to why though I think I know.



curator
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17 May 2009, 9:34 pm

Perhaps it's something that isn't even cultural. All of the groups you mentioned have warmer toned skin. As you know part of the spectrum is being sensitive to different senses... particular lights, sounds, smells, textures etc... maybe it's a simple as the frequency of reflected light off of their skin is a sensory trigger for you where as someone of your own ethnicity doesn't have that tone or at least not in as heavy of a concentration and so doesn't cause that same trigger. We know scientifically that a whole lot of our brain chemistry is actually a combination of lights and subliminal information... maybe that's all part of it.

I mean I know personally that I like fairer skin... it's not an ethnic thing because it doesn't matter where they are from how they were raised etc... but it does have an ethnic predisposition (because in that case there aren't many people say from South Africa who have fair skin... but if I met a South African albino that might do the trick.) Again it might not be an ethnic thing... everyone has their triggers.... some they know others they don't... most aspies are just a little more specific and on some level hold tighter to those triggers so it might not be an ethnic thing as it is a set of geographical circumstances which caused people to evolve to exhibit different traits which you find appealing. Just as I favor pale skin... you may favor warm toned skin... that means anyone around that geothermal belt from areas with similar elevations etc should be an option for you.



Johnklok
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18 May 2009, 6:33 am

Both of my only exg/fs are white, so I wonder if that is my personality, or that along w/the fact that I am half guatemaulan. As far as personality goes, some women feel as though I may not have much of one, because I don't get out much and don't interact well w/people socially (even despite my sense of humor and personal interests).