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Bonny
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25 May 2009, 11:59 pm

Hi to all, Have been on my own for long time now. Have had marriage,relationships and have children. Never had the time nor money to stop and put the pieces together since infancy when i knew i was " different ". 18 months ago someone who has only ever seen me twice called me 'a pretender"! !! No... i hadn't heard of LIanne Holliday-Willey and i doubt that person was wide read on any topic! But it brought me to a psychologist because it was time to look at the "life pattern" of too many such episodes of exclusion, for whatever reason.
All AS checks ticked...big relief for a while ...but who cares, many don't know ASDs at all, and now I don't want to play the NT's game at all. I am me!! ! And I will live me. Only problem is i have to figure out how to survive economically, cause NT's & their rules don't have spaces for square pegs like me. Crazy isn't it. To find out at 57 that i am human, of a specific model, and that i have to invent my own workplace to supply my needs until death brings departure - another 40-50 years away. Any suggestions compatriots and many thanks for reading. Have a nice day.
Bonny



ViperaAspis
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26 May 2009, 12:37 am

G'day mate!

Loved reading your intro. Takes me right back to that feeling, the rush of finding out that you ARE okay after all. And better yet, that you have a people, a culture, a commonality.

You are most welcome here. Good on ya!


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outlier
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26 May 2009, 4:34 am

Hello and welcome!



millie
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26 May 2009, 9:24 am

welcome bonny. hope the central west is fairing ok this evening.
warm here on the coast - so much so i had what I think was a brown snake on the back path in the sun the other day.



Bonny
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Joined: 24 May 2009
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28 May 2009, 10:06 am

Wow Millie, good to hear you've got sun enough for snakes. Or is this a consequence of all the floods up yr way?
Wednesday evening in my region was rainy- a good soak but not heavy. Plants are sitting up better today for it. You have impressive art on yr website.



xalepax
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28 May 2009, 10:22 am

Hi Bonny and welcome to join in and talk with us. Nice you choosed the womens forum for your introduction. I recognise myself in your words and also feel I dont want to play the NT game. I have been quite burned now during my life and there isnt much left of me as it feels like but I shall not bother you with that now.
Im glad you are here and hope you will feel yourself at home in this forum!


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Bonny
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Joined: 24 May 2009
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29 May 2009, 9:16 am

Nice to meet u Xalepax, Thank you for greeting me home. :star:



sinsboldly
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29 May 2009, 10:29 am

Bonny wrote:
Hi to all, Have been on my own for long time now. Have had marriage,relationships and have children. Never had the time nor money to stop and put the pieces together since infancy when i knew i was " different ". 18 months ago someone who has only ever seen me twice called me 'a pretender"! !! No... i hadn't heard of LIanne Holliday-Willey and i doubt that person was wide read on any topic! But it brought me to a psychologist because it was time to look at the "life pattern" of too many such episodes of exclusion, for whatever reason.
All AS checks ticked...big relief for a while ...but who cares, many don't know ASDs at all, and now I don't want to play the NT's game at all. I am me!! ! And I will live me. Only problem is i have to figure out how to survive economically, cause NT's & their rules don't have spaces for square pegs like me. Crazy isn't it. To find out at 57 that i am human, of a specific model, and that i have to invent my own workplace to supply my needs until death brings departure - another 40-50 years away. Any suggestions compatriots and many thanks for reading. Have a nice day.
Bonny


have a nice day, too, Bonny. I found out when I was 56, myself. I have a job where my supervisor wishes all her team was as 'focused and able to work without direction' as me. I have a cat and a wild and wooley autobiography. I now testify for various house bills at my State legislature for autism concerns. I mod on WP, too, and would like to join the others in welcoming you home.


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millie
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29 May 2009, 5:03 pm

Quote:
Bonny wrote:
Wow Millie, good to hear you've got sun enough for snakes. Or is this a consequence of all the floods up yr way?
Wednesday evening in my region was rainy- a good soak but not heavy. Plants are sitting up better today for it. You have impressive art on yr website.


no. we are up high on one of the hills in Murwillumbah and the snakes are still around at this time.
The valley was flooded and roads were cut, but the town survived, unlike the other towns down south a bit.

hope you find some hope and identification here. it has made a heck of a difference to me - especially the identification with other women with ASD's.



Bonny
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30 May 2009, 10:39 am

Millie and Sinsboldly, Yours and others goodwill and greetings have moved me. I have been sitting here for over 1/2 an hour trying to reply to you both. I am overwhelmed now, but I will get back to you both later.



TurboGirl
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05 Jun 2009, 3:31 pm

I was having a search around Amazon and noticed there's a couple of new books listed which deal with employment & Aspies... I think one was by Luke Beardon who's very well thought of here in Middle Englandshire. Maybe your local support group/ similar might buy some for the good of all?

I've been practically unemployable all my life- so the answer has been to become self employed. If I didn't have a partner who's my hubby as well, I'd probably be in Nirvana! I'm a motor trader dealing in used 4x4s but hey, whatever you enjoy doing has to be a good thing to spend time on...

Welcome and good luck here, love- for every 1000 who understand, there might be 1 cantankerous git, but thats gotta be better odds than in RightPlanet land!


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Bonny
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Joined: 24 May 2009
Age: 72
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Posts: 166
Location: my garden

06 Jun 2009, 9:43 am

Thanks TurboGirl, self employment is the way to go. I'm having difficulty 'knowing' what i feel passionately about at this point in my life. I have just finished 2 decades of mothering and been involved with work for the mortgage only jobs. New self awareness means new motivational source/s also. Anger and frustration moved me in the past as motivational forces that kept me on track, now i'm realising, i've got to find the courage to love what i do and do what i love doing. A few avenues are opening up: art; research.... . I'll follow yr tip on Luke Beardon. Many thanks TurboGirl.



Bonny
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Joined: 24 May 2009
Age: 72
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Posts: 166
Location: my garden

06 Jun 2009, 10:44 am

Quote:
hope you find some hope and identification here.


Yr right Millie, hope and identification are what I need. I am feeling more at ease just knowing that such a large Aspie community exists, that i do have a full field of people to identify with and to relate to.
Sinsboldly, that's what took my breath away last week. I'm not used to being visible to others . Reading both your posts i felt the expansion in your sense of self. Expansion is new to me - having deliberately shut myself down. Anyways, new skins grow and new worlds emerge.
Cheers for now.