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Forum: General Autism Discussion Topic: Facing the real world. |
| Saturn |
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Posted: 16 Jul 2012, 12:15 pm
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Replies: 54
Views: 4,897
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| I'm also currently facing the reality that I will have to get work, and for similar reasons to you as my little self-employed income has been drying up and my social isolation is not what I really want. I've considered my recent diagnosis in looking for work this time round but as most jobs invovle ... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: seeking redemption |
| Saturn |
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Posted: 25 Jun 2012, 12:19 am
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Replies: 10
Views: 1,866
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| I can relate to what you're saying. |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Bizarre Online Dating Experience - Advice Sought |
| Saturn |
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Posted: 21 May 2012, 2:53 pm
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Replies: 7
Views: 1,437
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| My advice is to stick with the reputable paid sites that require accurate personal information and a credit card to sign up, and that focus on creating a match, rather than casual chatting & taking quizzes. match.com has worked for me, and some of my friends have had good results with eharmony.... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Bizarre Online Dating Experience - Advice Sought |
| Saturn |
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Posted: 21 May 2012, 2:51 pm
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Replies: 7
Views: 1,437
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| What an odd experience. The only advice I have is if you still have any messages from either of them is to look at them side by side. Many people make certain spelling or grammar errors repeatedly, or use a similar turn of phrase. You would have to be quite educated (and careful) to be able to writ... |
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Forum: Love and Dating Topic: Bizarre Online Dating Experience - Advice Sought |
| Saturn |
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Posted: 21 May 2012, 2:31 pm
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Replies: 7
Views: 1,437
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| I've recently a very strange experience using a well-known dating site. I will attempt to summarize the points of the story that I wish to reveal and that I think are relevent to arriving at an explanation for what happened. I would like to hear from you have any observations or suggestions to make.... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Self Esteem |
| Saturn |
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Posted: 09 May 2012, 4:55 pm
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Replies: 28
Views: 3,249
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| ... proof is hard to find without its opposite, because I am all things, all emotions, both light and dark, good and bad. If loving is a quality I have, I also hate, so love is canceled out. Perhaps that is where the error in my brain is. I believe the negative over the positive almost always. Simi... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Self Esteem |
| Saturn |
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Posted: 09 May 2012, 4:20 pm
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Replies: 28
Views: 3,249
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| Yesterday, I felt overcome with feelings of low self esteem and was basically a bit depressed about myself. From there I had waves of thoughts centring around the apparant fact that life is pointless. I'm really weird that way ... the idea that life is pointless cheers me up. There's no use getting... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Self Esteem |
| Saturn |
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Posted: 09 May 2012, 2:17 pm
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Replies: 28
Views: 3,249
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| All within me is contradiction and paradox. In the past I've rationalised what this says to me by saying something like: if I think well of myself then I must also think poorly of myself because well/poorly are a mutually dependent pair where each needs the other by which to define itself, and ther... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Self Esteem |
| Saturn |
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Posted: 09 May 2012, 1:04 pm
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Replies: 28
Views: 3,249
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| I somehow lost this bit of my last post and then managed to recover it: I'm reflecting on this right now and I think that perhaps a tendency to value ones actions, consciously or subconsciously, with reference to this deeply embedded complex of what is virtuous and what is not, is relevent to our an... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Self Esteem |
| Saturn |
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Posted: 09 May 2012, 1:01 pm
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Replies: 28
Views: 3,249
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| Hi Cass, Sorry it's taken me so long to revisit this ... I think the root of low self esteem is different for each of us. I'm still trying to find the root of mine. It has something to do with being taught that pride was selfish and bad. To feel good about myself is to fail to see my bad. I see ever... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Self Esteem |
| Saturn |
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Posted: 07 May 2012, 4:11 pm
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Replies: 28
Views: 3,249
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| Hi Cass, I like your post. It can get tricky for me here, because I feel I ought to be able to feel good about myself without having to achieve anything in particular. I feel the same way. Although it may be an effect of not feeling anything through accomplishments that has led me to believe I need ... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Vulnerability to self-judgement tirades? |
| Saturn |
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Posted: 06 May 2012, 2:38 pm
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Replies: 28
Views: 3,170
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| For me feeling good 'is' performing well. Then again it used to be pretty close to 100% correlation but, albeit - like with anyone else alive and breathing on this planet past 25 - reality sets in and you realize the sky's not the limit, rather its significantly lower. What I'm trying to do right n... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Vulnerability to self-judgement tirades? |
| Saturn |
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Posted: 06 May 2012, 1:40 pm
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Replies: 28
Views: 3,170
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| I don't think that is a problem. That's how you are and you need to find ways that work for you. Well, I'd probably be better off rephrasing that then 'That's my dilemma' - ie. the quick and easy fixes are off the table for me Having said that, it sounds as though you/we are susceptible to the sugg... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: This isn't me. |
| Saturn |
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Posted: 06 May 2012, 12:54 pm
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Replies: 6
Views: 993
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| Well, I think I sympathise. You obviously have quite a strong desire there to turn things around for yourself. I don't know what to advise, though. I think advice is often redundant for me because we are all on a different trajectory. For me, I would try and get to the bottom of what was going on wi... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Vulnerability to self-judgement tirades? |
| Saturn |
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Posted: 06 May 2012, 12:38 pm
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Replies: 28
Views: 3,170
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| Yea. My subconscious is good at ignoring anything I try to "tell" it. That's precisely my problem - very low proclivity to suggestion. I don't think that is a problem. That's how you are and you need to find ways that work for you. Having said that, it sounds as though you/we are susceptible to the... |
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Forum: The Haven Topic: Self Esteem |
| Saturn |
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Posted: 06 May 2012, 12:29 pm
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Replies: 28
Views: 3,249
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| I have had the problem that I seem to make everyone else's opinion or needs more important than my own, but I think for me it's been an escape from being responsible for my own life, thus the term "challenges" - but that's just me of course. Interesting. I can see how that might work although I wou... |
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