Going back to school. What should I do differently?

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Marknis
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10 Jan 2017, 9:48 am

I haven't been to college for about two years now but I decided to go back in an attempt to make this year different. It's not the college of my choice but I have financial and work related time constraints. I also signed up late so I had to take what I could get. It's a start, I suppose.

My past experiences with college weren't the best. Some classes I thought I would do good in I failed instead and the social life there wasn't much different than how it was in high school. I guess I watched too many college oriented movies like Animal House, Revenge of the Nerds, and Back to School and thought college was supposed to be like how it was in those movies. I should've known to separate fact from fiction, especially since I was at a community college instead of university.

What can I do differently to make my experience better this time around?



Alliekit
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10 Jan 2017, 10:34 am

- join a society or group you are interested in (be brave as while it's a scary thing to do its a great way to make friends and develop social skills, plus friends =more chances at meeting women)

- keep in mind that it is tough but that doesn't mean you are a failure, it just means the work is really tough (I can definitely relate to this one)

- you aren't the only one struggling even if everyone else talks like they find it easy (they are often embarassed and try to hide that they are struggling tol).


Most importantly

Be Brave and always ask yourself 'what have you got to lose'



Marknis
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11 Jan 2017, 2:25 am

I looked into the clubs the college offers. Unfortunately, there are none for special interests, just general ones. I suppose I could attend atleast a meeting or two just to see what they're like.



Hexen
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11 Jan 2017, 4:21 pm

Marknis wrote:
I looked into the clubs the college offers. Unfortunately, there are none for special interests, just general ones. I suppose I could attend atleast a meeting or two just to see what they're like.

It depends on your goals. I would honestly avoid groups and spend most of your time studying and trying to complete college in as fast of time as possible. before you take any college program, degree or certification; you need to look up salary, job availability and if you'll enjoy the career. Do not waste your time going to "explore" what you want to do. I did that and my financial aid ran out and I had to reapply. See, college wants you to "explore", it makes the college more money. You do not want to do this. You want to have a plan and stick with it. You can still socialize and join a group if you want, however do not let it distract from your work.



Marknis
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11 Jan 2017, 4:59 pm

Hexen wrote:
Marknis wrote:
I looked into the clubs the college offers. Unfortunately, there are none for special interests, just general ones. I suppose I could attend atleast a meeting or two just to see what they're like.

It depends on your goals. I would honestly avoid groups and spend most of your time studying and trying to complete college in as fast of time as possible. before you take any college program, degree or certification; you need to look up salary, job availability and if you'll enjoy the career. Do not waste your time going to "explore" what you want to do. I did that and my financial aid ran out and I had to reapply. See, college wants you to "explore", it makes the college more money. You do not want to do this. You want to have a plan and stick with it. You can still socialize and join a group if you want, however do not let it distract from your work.


My therapist told me something similar. She feels that socialization should be a by-product rather than the main goal of college but I would still like to see if I am missing out on anything. It feels soul draining to see others socializing between classes while I am all alone.

Unfortunately, I am also a lost soul in regards to a career and that in itself has affected my college performance. I struggle with math and it seems like every career requires some mathematical knowledge but math just doesn't come to me naturally. I had to take mandatory math classes due to flunking the math portion of the accuplacer and I could only fit in just one more class because of my work schedule as well. My bad performance in math stressed me out to the point the stress affected my performance in the other classes and I even failed at them because of that.

I just saw someone younger than me receive their associates degree. I don't have that at all.



Hexen
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11 Jan 2017, 5:12 pm

Marknis wrote:
Hexen wrote:
Marknis wrote:
I looked into the clubs the college offers. Unfortunately, there are none for special interests, just general ones. I suppose I could attend atleast a meeting or two just to see what they're like.

It depends on your goals. I would honestly avoid groups and spend most of your time studying and trying to complete college in as fast of time as possible. before you take any college program, degree or certification; you need to look up salary, job availability and if you'll enjoy the career. Do not waste your time going to "explore" what you want to do. I did that and my financial aid ran out and I had to reapply. See, college wants you to "explore", it makes the college more money. You do not want to do this. You want to have a plan and stick with it. You can still socialize and join a group if you want, however do not let it distract from your work.


My therapist told me something similar. She feels that socialization should be a by-product rather than the main goal of college but I would still like to see if I am missing out on anything. It feels soul draining to see others socializing between classes while I am all alone.

Unfortunately, I am also a lost soul in regards to a career and that in itself has affected my college performance. I struggle with math and it seems like every career requires some mathematical knowledge but math just doesn't come to me naturally. I had to take mandatory math classes due to flunking the math portion of the accuplacer and I could only fit in just one more class because of my work schedule as well. My bad performance in math stressed me out to the point the stress affected my performance in the other classes and I even failed at them because of that.

I just saw someone younger than me receive their associates degree. I don't have that at all.

I don't worry about socializing in college due to most people there either being self-proclaimed socialists, or progressives liberals that think the government should control everything. My point is, you may not find your type of people at college.



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11 Jan 2017, 5:38 pm

I just mentioned the social thing becaude in PMs you were saying about your hope for socialising and meeting people :)

Remember to not be too hard on yourself, college is a good way to find out what you want to do and what your passions are. I know that it helped me become idependant.

Today I even overcame my fear and confronted my supervisor, something I've always been afraid of in the past.

I know the learning is important but you also need to enjoy the learning experience. For me science and research is something I love and enjoy doing. Being in a lab feels at home to me. I hope you find something like that for you :D



Marknis
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11 Jan 2017, 6:41 pm

Hexen wrote:
Marknis wrote:
Hexen wrote:
Marknis wrote:
I looked into the clubs the college offers. Unfortunately, there are none for special interests, just general ones. I suppose I could attend atleast a meeting or two just to see what they're like.

It depends on your goals. I would honestly avoid groups and spend most of your time studying and trying to complete college in as fast of time as possible. before you take any college program, degree or certification; you need to look up salary, job availability and if you'll enjoy the career. Do not waste your time going to "explore" what you want to do. I did that and my financial aid ran out and I had to reapply. See, college wants you to "explore", it makes the college more money. You do not want to do this. You want to have a plan and stick with it. You can still socialize and join a group if you want, however do not let it distract from your work.


My therapist told me something similar. She feels that socialization should be a by-product rather than the main goal of college but I would still like to see if I am missing out on anything. It feels soul draining to see others socializing between classes while I am all alone.

Unfortunately, I am also a lost soul in regards to a career and that in itself has affected my college performance. I struggle with math and it seems like every career requires some mathematical knowledge but math just doesn't come to me naturally. I had to take mandatory math classes due to flunking the math portion of the accuplacer and I could only fit in just one more class because of my work schedule as well. My bad performance in math stressed me out to the point the stress affected my performance in the other classes and I even failed at them because of that.

I just saw someone younger than me receive their associates degree. I don't have that at all.

I don't worry about socializing in college due to most people there either being self-proclaimed socialists, or progressives liberals that think the government should control everything. My point is, you may not find your type of people at college.


I forgot to mention that I live in the Bible Belt so those sorts of people are in the extreme minority. I am also going to a community college that I have been to before. The people tend to range from rednecks who realize you do need to learn some "fancy book learnin'" in this life but they still think "If it ain't white or Christian, it's wrong." to more liberal minded but not SJW level people.



Marknis
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11 Jan 2017, 6:43 pm

Alliekit wrote:
I just mentioned the social thing becaude in PMs you were saying about your hope for socialising and meeting people :)

Remember to not be too hard on yourself, college is a good way to find out what you want to do and what your passions are. I know that it helped me become idependant.

Today I even overcame my fear and confronted my supervisor, something I've always been afraid of in the past.

I know the learning is important but you also need to enjoy the learning experience. For me science and research is something I love and enjoy doing. Being in a lab feels at home to me. I hope you find something like that for you :D


Good job on the supervisor deal! I had to do the same except mine was a work related deal.

Are you pretty much saying what my therapist told me?



Hexen
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12 Jan 2017, 8:10 am

Marknis wrote:
Hexen wrote:
Marknis wrote:
Hexen wrote:
Marknis wrote:
I looked into the clubs the college offers. Unfortunately, there are none for special interests, just general ones. I suppose I could attend atleast a meeting or two just to see what they're like.

It depends on your goals. I would honestly avoid groups and spend most of your time studying and trying to complete college in as fast of time as possible. before you take any college program, degree or certification; you need to look up salary, job availability and if you'll enjoy the career. Do not waste your time going to "explore" what you want to do. I did that and my financial aid ran out and I had to reapply. See, college wants you to "explore", it makes the college more money. You do not want to do this. You want to have a plan and stick with it. You can still socialize and join a group if you want, however do not let it distract from your work.


My therapist told me something similar. She feels that socialization should be a by-product rather than the main goal of college but I would still like to see if I am missing out on anything. It feels soul draining to see others socializing between classes while I am all alone.

Unfortunately, I am also a lost soul in regards to a career and that in itself has affected my college performance. I struggle with math and it seems like every career requires some mathematical knowledge but math just doesn't come to me naturally. I had to take mandatory math classes due to flunking the math portion of the accuplacer and I could only fit in just one more class because of my work schedule as well. My bad performance in math stressed me out to the point the stress affected my performance in the other classes and I even failed at them because of that.

I just saw someone younger than me receive their associates degree. I don't have that at all.

I don't worry about socializing in college due to most people there either being self-proclaimed socialists, or progressives liberals that think the government should control everything. My point is, you may not find your type of people at college.


I forgot to mention that I live in the Bible Belt so those sorts of people are in the extreme minority. I am also going to a community college that I have been to before. The people tend to range from rednecks who realize you do need to learn some "fancy book learnin'" in this life but they still think "If it ain't white or Christian, it's wrong." to more liberal minded but not SJW level people.

Where at in the bible belt? Georgia isn't too bad, besides it being hot. You can still find more liberal people as you put it. See, I'm fiscally conservative, but socially liberal; so it's hard to meet anyone that has the same mindset, especially who statically lean very far left, as in anti-gun and pro-big government. I'm pro-second amendment and pro-gay marriage. You see my problem? lol



Marknis
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12 Jan 2017, 11:15 am

Hexen wrote:
Marknis wrote:
Hexen wrote:
Marknis wrote:
Hexen wrote:
Marknis wrote:
I looked into the clubs the college offers. Unfortunately, there are none for special interests, just general ones. I suppose I could attend atleast a meeting or two just to see what they're like.

It depends on your goals. I would honestly avoid groups and spend most of your time studying and trying to complete college in as fast of time as possible. before you take any college program, degree or certification; you need to look up salary, job availability and if you'll enjoy the career. Do not waste your time going to "explore" what you want to do. I did that and my financial aid ran out and I had to reapply. See, college wants you to "explore", it makes the college more money. You do not want to do this. You want to have a plan and stick with it. You can still socialize and join a group if you want, however do not let it distract from your work.


My therapist told me something similar. She feels that socialization should be a by-product rather than the main goal of college but I would still like to see if I am missing out on anything. It feels soul draining to see others socializing between classes while I am all alone.

Unfortunately, I am also a lost soul in regards to a career and that in itself has affected my college performance. I struggle with math and it seems like every career requires some mathematical knowledge but math just doesn't come to me naturally. I had to take mandatory math classes due to flunking the math portion of the accuplacer and I could only fit in just one more class because of my work schedule as well. My bad performance in math stressed me out to the point the stress affected my performance in the other classes and I even failed at them because of that.

I just saw someone younger than me receive their associates degree. I don't have that at all.

I don't worry about socializing in college due to most people there either being self-proclaimed socialists, or progressives liberals that think the government should control everything. My point is, you may not find your type of people at college.


I forgot to mention that I live in the Bible Belt so those sorts of people are in the extreme minority. I am also going to a community college that I have been to before. The people tend to range from rednecks who realize you do need to learn some "fancy book learnin'" in this life but they still think "If it ain't white or Christian, it's wrong." to more liberal minded but not SJW level people.

Where at in the bible belt? Georgia isn't too bad, besides it being hot. You can still find more liberal people as you put it. See, I'm fiscally conservative, but socially liberal; so it's hard to meet anyone that has the same mindset, especially who statically lean very far left, as in anti-gun and pro-big government. I'm pro-second amendment and pro-gay marriage. You see my problem? lol


Central Texas. If you think Georgia's hot, Texas will make it look like a campfire.

Like you, I don't see fully eye to eye with either conservatives or liberals. I am for gun ownership as long as the person clears a background check with flying colors but I dislike the religious right, especially with the redneck mentality I just mentioned. I agree with liberals on LGBT rights and the freedom to practice the religion of your choice but I dislike the SJW mentality that declares that anyone who is a straight white male is committing racism and sexism just by breathing. If they saw how the rednecks treated me in my school years, they would see how silly and ridiculous that mentality is.



Marknis
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23 Jan 2017, 11:42 am

Well, the club thing isn't going to work out. I was told none of the clubs were active and I'd have to gather interest from other students if I wanted to have one start back up. I don't have the psychological energy for this since I am already going through a lot of things already.



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23 Jan 2017, 11:51 am

My experience with these clubs is that there usually a professional one like 'future nurses' or something along those lines or racial ones

Maybe that would be different at a larger school, I don't know



Marknis
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23 Jan 2017, 11:59 am

Jacoby wrote:
My experience with these clubs is that there usually a professional one like 'future nurses' or something along those lines or racial ones

Maybe that would be different at a larger school, I don't know


The list I was given had those things.
No special interests, just general future career related things, an NAACP group, and a LGBT one.
Atleast I know I am not missing out on anything with nothing being open.



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24 Jan 2017, 12:08 pm

Marknis wrote:
Jacoby wrote:
My experience with these clubs is that there usually a professional one like 'future nurses' or something along those lines or racial ones

Maybe that would be different at a larger school, I don't know


The list I was given had those things.
No special interests, just general future career related things, an NAACP group, and a LGBT one.
Atleast I know I am not missing out on anything with nothing being open.


With those clubs, you have to ask yourself, am I one of those people? In grad school I joined a "getting articles published" club and quit after the first meeting. I hated everyone there and just wanted to go home and watch Miami Vice by myself and drink with my dog.

I think maybe if I had spent less time around people I hated I would have done less drinking with my dog in general.