Refering to females as "ladies" is dangerous in workplace

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CockneyRebel
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24 Jun 2023, 1:55 pm

I like men and women better because it goes with my casual hippie philosophy.


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KitLily
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24 Jun 2023, 3:03 pm

MatchboxVagabond wrote:
KitLily wrote:
I think also, ladies and gentlemen have different connotations in England and in America.

I can't imagine anyone in England saying, 'lady keep that kid quiet', for example. We just don't use it like that. We usually say, 'can you give this item to the lady over there please?'


It's phatic speech. Some people don't recognize one or the other interpretations of the word "lady." In the US, they're both generally understood, although the context would give some indication. Usually that first example would come dripping with so much snark, sarcasm and eye rolling that it's absolutely clear that the word is being used ironically.


We just don't address people as 'lady' directly in Britain. We say 'that lady' or 'those ladies' or something when referring to women. We'd say 'madam' or 'miss' as a direct address.

Just one of those differences in types of English I suppose :)


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24 Jun 2023, 4:09 pm

Recidivist wrote:
Joe90 wrote:
Why is Ka*n censored? I mean, what if someone is called Ka*n?

Testing: I saw my friend Ka*n today.

Wow. I'd be well pissed off if my name was so offensive it got censored out.


If the word censored is Ka*n K A R E N, it is because

Cornflake wrote:
it's a sexist generalization attempting to create a hated sub-class of women.


What's wrong with having negative views of racist white women? We should be hostile towards women who seek to use the damsel in distress card to cause problems for members of minority groups going about their day-to-day lives.


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24 Jun 2023, 4:44 pm

funeralxempire wrote:
Recidivist wrote:
Joe90 wrote:
Why is Ka*n censored? I mean, what if someone is called Ka*n?

Testing: I saw my friend Ka*n today.

Wow. I'd be well pissed off if my name was so offensive it got censored out.


If the word censored is Ka*n K A R E N, it is because

Cornflake wrote:
it's a sexist generalization attempting to create a hated sub-class of women.


What's wrong with having negative views of racist white women? We should be hostile towards women who seek to use the damsel in distress card to cause problems for members of minority groups going about their day-to-day lives.


You can have whatever views you want, you just can't always air them (frustrating I know).

You are moving the goalposts there. I've read that K A R E N S are not always racist or white they are generally entitled so I whole heartedly agree with CF that it is a generalization attempting to create a hated sub-class of women

I also don't think you should be hostile to anyone on WP as it is against the rules, if you have beef with someones attitude report them to a mod. I know this is difficult and have been guilty of hostility myself but I'm working on it.


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IsabellaLinton
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24 Jun 2023, 4:48 pm

As for Karens if they're "racist white women" then wouldn't it be sufficient to call them out for being racist?

I'm not sure the subset of being white or being female add to the stereotype in a meaningful way.

Being racist is bad enough on its own.

Calling a person racist when and if they are should suffice, without making a trope of their race or gender.


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TwilightPrincess
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24 Jun 2023, 4:51 pm

People can be called out for making racist remarks. We don't need to resort to sexist slurs.

I can't say that I've seen anyone pulling the "damsel in distress card." :roll:

Racism does not justify sexism.


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Joe90
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24 Jun 2023, 4:59 pm

I don't refer Karens as racist white women, I refer them to anyone who makes a big ado about a word that originally isn't supposed to be offensive.


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TwilightPrincess
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24 Jun 2023, 5:01 pm

Joe90 wrote:
I don't refer Karens as racist white women, I refer them to anyone who makes a big ado about a word that originally isn't supposed to be offensive.

Lots of words which weren't originally "supposed to be offensive" are now. Living languages evolve over time. They aren't static. Meaning and shades of meaning change over time.


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Last edited by TwilightPrincess on 24 Jun 2023, 5:02 pm, edited 1 time in total.

funeralxempire
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24 Jun 2023, 5:01 pm

Recidivist wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
Recidivist wrote:
Joe90 wrote:
Why is Ka*n censored? I mean, what if someone is called Ka*n?

Testing: I saw my friend Ka*n today.

Wow. I'd be well pissed off if my name was so offensive it got censored out.


If the word censored is Ka*n K A R E N, it is because

Cornflake wrote:
it's a sexist generalization attempting to create a hated sub-class of women.


What's wrong with having negative views of racist white women? We should be hostile towards women who seek to use the damsel in distress card to cause problems for members of minority groups going about their day-to-day lives.


You can have whatever views you want, you just can't always air them (frustrating I know).

You are moving the goalposts there. I've read that K A R E N S are not always racist or white they are generally entitled so I whole heartedly agree with CF that it is a generalization attempting to create a hated sub-class of women

I also don't think you should be hostile to anyone on WP as it is against the rules, if you have beef with someones attitude report them to a mod. I know this is difficult and have been guilty of hostility myself but I'm working on it.


I don't think I'm being hostile, I'm merely criticizing a bad policy for being a bad policy.

IsabellaLinton wrote:
As for Karens if they're "racist white women" then wouldn't it be sufficient to call them out for being racist?

I'm not sure the subset of being white or being female add to the stereotype in a meaningful way.

Being racist is bad enough on its own.

Calling a person racist when and if they are should suffice, without making a trope of their race or gender.


Keep in mind how the term Karen was used before it started to get used to describe any woman who made a fuss. As long as there's people of privilege who rely on playing the damsel in distress card to target minorities there's going to be a term to describe those people.

A term to describe that sort of behaviour will exist because it's distinct enough to identify as a specific problem.

The problem isn't the existence of the word Karen (or whatever will replace it), instead it's a) that that behaviour exists in the first place and b) that term became viral and for many people lost all connection to what it was initially used to describe.

There's a reason tropes about white tears/white women's tears are common. I'll leave a few articles for you to consider:

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfr ... untability
https://metro.co.uk/2021/01/28/the-dest ... -13944822/
https://www.theroot.com/white-tears-exp ... 1822522689

We should be able to call out people who rely on crocodile tears to appear like the victim when they're actually the aggressor. We should be able to call out women who rely on that strategy to get away with racial harassment, they're not victims, they're cry-bullies.


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funeralxempire
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24 Jun 2023, 5:03 pm

TwilightPrincess wrote:
I can't say that I've seen anyone pulling the "damsel in distress card." :roll:


That's exactly what Amy Cooper tried to pull.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Central_P ... g_incident


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24 Jun 2023, 5:05 pm

You can call out behavior without resorting to sexist slurs.


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Joe90
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24 Jun 2023, 5:07 pm

I think the word Karen is offensive to people called Karen.


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24 Jun 2023, 5:09 pm

funeralxempire wrote:
Recidivist wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
Recidivist wrote:
Joe90 wrote:
Why is Ka*n censored? I mean, what if someone is called Ka*n?

Testing: I saw my friend Ka*n today.

Wow. I'd be well pissed off if my name was so offensive it got censored out.


If the word censored is Ka*n K A R E N, it is because

Cornflake wrote:
it's a sexist generalization attempting to create a hated sub-class of women.


What's wrong with having negative views of racist white women? We should be hostile towards women who seek to use the damsel in distress card to cause problems for members of minority groups going about their day-to-day lives.


You can have whatever views you want, you just can't always air them (frustrating I know).

You are moving the goalposts there. I've read that K A R E N S are not always racist or white they are generally entitled so I whole heartedly agree with CF that it is a generalization attempting to create a hated sub-class of women

I also don't think you should be hostile to anyone on WP as it is against the rules, if you have beef with someones attitude report them to a mod. I know this is difficult and have been guilty of hostility myself but I'm working on it.


I don't think I'm being hostile, I'm merely criticizing a bad policy for being a bad policy.


No, you said we should be hostile to 'damsel in distress...............' , I said that was a bad idea. :roll:


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funeralxempire
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24 Jun 2023, 5:11 pm

TwilightPrincess wrote:
You can call out behavior without resorting to sexist slurs.


In this case sexism is interwoven into the behaviour being called out and there's nothing wrong with calling it what it is.

It isn't just racist bullying, it's a specific form of racist cry-bullying that only women can successfully engage in. Because only women can engage in it, there's no way to discuss it without at least acknowledging that.


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24 Jun 2023, 5:11 pm

I agree these people exist and some of them are motivated by entitlement. That's the whole point. That's why racism exists, because some people think they should be more entitled to whatever it is they have or they think than other people. Using gender specifically, I just don't understand why we need to differentiate between a racist white man and a racist white woman, assuming all other things are equal and they both act like cry-bullies (good term, btw.) Removing gender and focussing on race we also have entitled people from non-white backgrounds who are racist against other ethnic groups who may be non-white. We could have a man and woman (let's say husband and wife), from one cultural background being entitled or elitist and racist toward another husband and wife from a different non-white cultural background.

Aren't all of these people equally racist and entitled, and don't they all deserve to be called racist?

I suppose all Karens aren't racist either. Some of them are called that word just because they complain to a manager or they go loco on social media about whatever's bothering them in their supposedly privileged lives, but it's not always about race. The people acting that way aren't always cis female or white either, although it does add to the stereotype and general mystique when they are.


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24 Jun 2023, 5:12 pm

funeralxempire wrote:
TwilightPrincess wrote:
You can call out behavior without resorting to sexist slurs.


In this case sexism is interwoven into the behaviour being called out and there's nothing wrong with calling it what it is.

It isn't just racist bullying, it's a specific form of racist cry-bullying that only women can successfully engage in. Because only women can engage in it, there's no way to discuss it without at least acknowledging that.

Disappointing.


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