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blueghost
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17 Oct 2017, 3:05 pm

This question and answer applies to every aspect of my life, but I'm specifically referring to a career.

I pursued a career in animation and quickly learned it wasn't for me. Ever since, I obsess on that constantly. If I don't want to do the ONE thing I thought I did, what the heck do I do? I have to support a wife and possible family.

When I truly think about what I like about my job, the ONLY thing is that there are days (like today) where I literally don't have to do ANYTHING. That's the only reason I like this job. Also I get my own office, but now we're moving to an open office (literally my best to my worst possible situation).

I just, literally don't want a career. I don't want to do anything. I want to get paid to do nothing. My AS does help at my job when I do actual work since I obsess on every little detail which is the nature of the work.

Does anyone feel this way and if so how did you cope?



ok
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18 Oct 2017, 4:00 pm

I get the same feeling as you do because of my unemployment. I can't get a decent job and the ones I get doesn't interest me very much. Sometimes I dream of staying at home, doing the dishes and playing guitar while my spouse earns the money. It can't happen, but I dream about it.

Society shuns people with autism, and very few of us have jobs. In society's eyes, we are useless on the job market. Unemployable and lazy. I want to prove them wrong, but I can't even get a job to do so.

So what's the solution? I don't know. One suggestion could be, that you tell your boss that you are a little overqualified for your job. Perhaps he or she will give you something challenging, that will make the nothingness go away.


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starkid
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18 Oct 2017, 8:27 pm

blueghost wrote:
I just, literally don't want a career. I don't want to do anything. I want to get paid to do nothing. My AS does help at my job when I do actual work since I obsess on every little detail which is the nature of the work.

What's wrong with attention to detail if that's part of the job? It helps you complete the work and get paid, doesn't it? Maybe losing yourself in those details will help you enjoy your job.

Quote:
Does anyone feel this way and if so how did you cope?


Kind of. I used to feel it more strongly, but I became absorbed in learning my job and doing my best. Maybe it was easier for me because I chose my career and had to rely on myself to make it work (I work freelance).

I enjoy learning and mastering new things, and that's what I had to do because I had no relevant training and was a complete beginner. I don't like my job a lot but I've built up and continue to build up sufficient expertise so that I don't have to focus on it too much to perform satisfactorily. Of course it helps A LOT that I work from home and choose my own hours and clients (to an extent).

So I guess try focusing on what you like (even if that's just the ability to do nothing some days) and become proficient enough to sort of zone out/meditate/not be psychologically consumed by the work tasks you perform.



shortfatbalduglyman
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18 Oct 2017, 10:16 pm

right now i am way too lazy to work.

yesterday, the counselor checked the "motor retardation" box on the insurance application form.

motor retardation.

thus, i am now, officially, formally, :cry: ret*d. :D that is not an insult, it is just a diagnostic category.

the counselor seems so nice to me, and i feel like i have presented her with my best side. while not concealing my numerous weaknesses.

anyways ain't got no job skills.

had a couple jobs. all minimum wage.

got fired

seriously do not wanna do anything

i am:

academically stupid, physically weak, emotionally fragile, socially awkward,

do not wanna do anything all day long

i am bored

i am boring


almost everyone i have ever interacted with is boring too

all i like to do is gorge and surf the internet and complain

sometimes i am too lazy to talk

what will become of me?

totally regret going to college.

maybe i should've joined the military at 18. make me emotionally resilient, and provide purpose and direction. and structure. and social interaction.



FerrariFan
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24 Oct 2017, 1:22 pm

shortfatbalduglyman wrote:
right now i am way too lazy to work.

yesterday, the counselor checked the "motor retardation" box on the insurance application form.

motor retardation.

thus, i am now, officially, formally, :cry: ret*d. :D that is not an insult, it is just a diagnostic category.

the counselor seems so nice to me, and i feel like i have presented her with my best side. while not concealing my numerous weaknesses.

anyways ain't got no job skills.

had a couple jobs. all minimum wage.

got fired

seriously do not wanna do anything

i am:

academically stupid, physically weak, emotionally fragile, socially awkward,

do not wanna do anything all day long

i am bored

i am boring


almost everyone i have ever interacted with is boring too

all i like to do is gorge and surf the internet and complain

sometimes i am too lazy to talk

what will become of me?

totally regret going to college.

maybe i should've joined the military at 18. make me emotionally resilient, and provide purpose and direction. and structure. and social interaction.



You don't strike me as falling into that category in any way at all. I actually find you rather interesting, not boring at all based on your posts.

Just my .02.



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shortfatbalduglyman
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24 Oct 2017, 1:59 pm

Ferrari Fan

The word "interesting" could be good or bad. Different people find different things "interesting".

13 years ago a former precious lil "friend" ( that turned out to be homophobic) had the nerve to tell me that my haircut was "interesting". She acted like she was trying to be kind and use the correct :oops: euphemism :idea:

"Boring" sounds bad. But there are many worse things than boredom. If someone raped me that would not be "boring". And I would rather be bored than get :roll: raped. :?:

:heart:

Anyways whatever....

Got a BA in Cognitive Science

AA, Accounting

Worked as a data entry clerk, cashier, actor, record keeping assistant, communications contractor, fast food restaurant

There is nothing that I know how to do, that is worth more than minimum wage......

Minimum wage is not enough for room and board, much less utilities, phone, psychotherapy, bus fare, and other luxuries

Pretty bad at driving. So reluctant to take a job outside public transportation distance

Large gaps in work history

Got fired plenty of times

Maybe I should just start panhandling. Collect cans for recycling

:cry:

The other thing is that I am so dissociated, that no way could i take a job where you have to constantly respond correctly to external stimuli. Which is pretty much all the jobs. But some jobs have a lot at stake.

Yeah at Phil Coffee, I was thinking, nobody would hire me there. Loud music, crowded, angry customers. Have to call out the orders. Standing up the whole time

Seriously there are so many jobs I flat out :lol: can't 8O do, because of autism symptoms....

And plenty of jobs I do not know how to do

Maybe I will end up homeless..........

Whatever job I did, the boss ended up telling me off. Several exceptions.....

I am not academically smart enough for an STEM job that might match my autistic demeanor

I am not physically strong

I am socially awkward

Nobody will hire me

Applied for a wide variety of jobs

Including Mc Donald's

Accounting,

What kind of job can I do?

Answer:. None

With or without accommodations


There is nothing to do all day long

Ain't got no precious lil "friends"


:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:



FerrariFan
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25 Oct 2017, 12:52 pm

Someone who is as mentally challenged as you state would not have been able to achieve what you have - BA degree, AA in Accounting just to name a few.

I certainly didn't mean to offend you with the term "interesting," I only meant that I am interested to know more about you.

I do, however, believe that your skillset could be worth more than minimum wage. There appears to be plenty of growth in the accounting industry. I am contemplating doing this myself as I prepare to retire from my current job. It may mean that you have to take a lower paying job for a while in order to build up your work history while you look for the perfect job for you.

So, the question would be "What would be YOUR perfect job?"

The second part is, "What steps do you need to do in order to get there?"


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shortfatbalduglyman
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26 Oct 2017, 2:50 pm

Ferrari fan

The BA was over ten years ago. It took six years. With a brief exception of an eight hour a week job, for ten weeks, was not working.

Got no good excuse for abysmal academic performance.

Except grotesque stupidity, genetics, homophobia :heart:

It was not at Harvard, Standford, or Yale

It was not STEM

It was 2.19 (gpa out of 4)

Took summer school a couple times

And I was pretty mentally challenged back then.

And doing much worse, functionally, right now

Two weeks ago, the counselor (who I have been at for eleven months) marked the box for "motor retardation", on the insurance form

Thus I am officially, clinically, ret*d :D

Not an insult

Besides, it doesn't make sense to say that I could not have gotten a BA if I was so mentally challenged.

You have to state, "challenged" at what, at what time

For example, Muhammad Ali got Parkinson's and that "challenged" his motor skills. But that was after he won boxing competition

:idea:

Quite frankly I am not interested in knowing more about myself. The more I find out the more disgusted I become.

Seriously it is one thing to have no job or friends. There could be a lot of reasons. Not necessarily my fault

But to not want to do anything, for pretty much years on end?

An AS in Accounting does not qualify someone for a lot of jobs. Very few jobs contain AA, accounting, in the description.

In accounting job descriptions, it usually says BA, accounting or cpa :skull:

Having said that, I strongly suspect that accounting, for me is as good as it gets

Minimum interaction

Quiet office

Desk job

Seriously I need a faster brain - :D brainfarts :cry: occur so often :heart: for so long

The most recent accounting job, the boss had the nerve to fire me the third day. She told me that the women (or woman) said I was learning too slowly and that you are working with people's money and you can't make mistakes

Nobody measured the velocity or accuracy rates

Besides what is a "mistake"? Did I invent a"mistake"? Nobody ever made a mistake before?

Plenty of precious lil "people" at work have made a wide variety of mistakes that harmed me. In some way. None of them got canned. That I know of

Anyways last year, in a Intro to Computer class, at community college, more than once I was the only one that claimed to be behind. In real time.

And I had already taken much harder computer classes

Brain

Degradation

Sometimes I feel like it is just :ninja: damage control :D

Avoid as many things as possible and practical. Avoid the good and the bad

Because sometimes bad things appear good

And usually bad things are more powerful than good things.................

But whatever.......



FerrariFan
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27 Oct 2017, 11:38 am

My Bachelors was over 25 years ago now. My Masters was right behind that. Neither were in STEM. When I entered the work force I had no idea what AS was, much less that it described me or fit me. However, I did find something that I was very good at - the one thing in my life that I could do better than those around me - either by talent or hard work or some combination of both.

Then I figured out how, by accident, to capitalize on that skill. I happened to find that in the military. Its only been the last couple of years that I have begun to figure out the whole AS thing. I have always known I didn't fit in and didn't process things like those around me. I also have very few, if any, friends. I do have a wife and kids and am beginning to understand the challenges I have unknowingly faced with each of them (and continue to do even today).

I think it does make perfect sense to state that you are underestimating yourself. You have achieved something that many could not with your degrees. Maybe your mental state has changed, I can't answer that. But your writing style and comprehension do not indicate that you are not capable of more than you think you can.

I have lived my life doing things that nobody said I could ever do. In fact, my education, career, and life have been based on those challenges. I could write 100 pages on that - but the fact is that I have achieved a lot, much more than my "friends" could even imagine. I have never felt limited by a label that someone put on me and I don't think that you should either. You are worthwhile and your skills are valuable, but you have to figure out how to best utilize those skills. The same is true for any of us AS or NT or anywhere in-between.

You do seem to me to have a low self-image and a rather defeatist attitude while you resign yourself to your current situation. Honestly, I prefer to not want to or have to do anything myself. I would prefer to sit at my house, watch tv, file my collections away, and largely be left alone. I think I would be happy/content with that for a while.

Sometimes you have to find the positives in whatever your situation is. I sincerely hope you can find that.

But back to the other questions:

1. What is your perfect job?

2. What can you do to get there?



FF



xatrix26
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30 Oct 2017, 9:46 am

I've been fired 9 times, been suspended 3 times and I've quit more than 30 jobs only to avoid being fired because of my typical Autisitic social difficulties. And now I have ergo-phobia, a fear of the workplace, as a result and every year my anxiety only grows. At 34 I had a heart attack due to a panic attack on the way to work, thankfully I was in a bus and not actually driving or else...

So yeah, if I could find a way to simply live at home while still able to pay bills, and essentially do nothing, then I would. More research is definitely required.

It's such a chore trying to get out of bed every morning...


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Almost
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03 Nov 2017, 2:26 am

My ideal job would be anything where I have predictable hours, do (more or less) the "same" thing everyday, and can have headphones in. Any job is infinitely better for me if I can have headphones in listening to podcasts/albums/etc. My last job was doing remote tech support and it more or less met my criteria, it was very formulaic and I often listened to music while doing it without any issues.

I think I could do janitorial work too, if the pay was good. Just go room to room with your equipment doing the same thing everyday while listening to one of my favorite podcasts. It'd feel like getting paid to do nothing which is a great feeling



nomad42
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04 Nov 2017, 10:23 pm

shortfatbalduglyman wrote:
right now i am way too lazy to work.

yesterday, the counselor checked the "motor retardation" box on the insurance application form.

motor retardation.

thus, i am now, officially, formally, :cry: ret*d. :D that is not an insult, it is just a diagnostic category.

the counselor seems so nice to me, and i feel like i have presented her with my best side. while not concealing my numerous weaknesses.

anyways ain't got no job skills.

had a couple jobs. all minimum wage.

got fired

seriously do not wanna do anything

i am:

academically stupid, physically weak, emotionally fragile, socially awkward,

do not wanna do anything all day long

i am bored

i am boring


almost everyone i have ever interacted with is boring too

all i like to do is gorge and surf the internet and complain

sometimes i am too lazy to talk

what will become of me?

totally regret going to college.

maybe i should've joined the military at 18. make me emotionally resilient, and provide purpose and direction. and structure. and social interaction.

I don't know if every person who served in the military is emotionally resilient, it works for some, not for all.



shortfatbalduglyman
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05 Nov 2017, 8:51 am

Nomad

There is no method of measuring emotional resilience

The Military Entrance Processing Station and Department of Defense Medical entrance review board do not list :heart: emotional 8) resilience :cry: in the list of temporary or permanent disqualifiers for the military.

Everyone is more emotionally resilient at some times and less at some times

But whatever.

I am 34 years old.

It was just a fantasy, the Air Force.

Other fantasies:

Civil engineering
Ectomorph
Socially adept
Breast reduction surgery
:cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry: :cry:


But whatever

The world contains a lot of worse lives than mine

Poverty:. Homeless, hungry

Disease

Crime

Defendants wrongfully accused and sent to jail

Plenty of children drop dead before they turn 18

So maybe I ought to be grateful and look at the bright side

:D

Besides, plenty of people do not have what they call a perfect body

And if they do, they still could get diseases

Plenty of people do not fulfill their childhood career aspirations

At least I got to go to college when I was 18

Plenty of people get rejected for the military. The military has numerous disqualifiers.

A couple of years ago some articles claim that the military rejected 80 percent of applicants, for criminal background, education, medical reasons

Besides, plenty of recruits get injured and kicked out the military

The Military has grossly disproportionate punishments for each perceived slight. And military jail is more strict than civilian jail

And living in close quarters, 24/7/365, with the exception of liberty

And the pressure, stress

So whatever

Civilian panhandler

Not Combat Engineer , it is

:cry:



diggity
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15 Nov 2017, 3:54 pm

The thing about careers is that sometime you just don't know you're gonna like it until you try it. I felt the same way not too long ago, thinking of myself as a jack of all trades, master of none. Since then I've had to keep reminding myself that i want to be a master of all trades, and that even if i have to do something that i didn't expect myself to be doing, like building, carpentry or mechanics, it doesn't matter where i start because they all lead up to my final goal. it takes a not only effort on your part but also finding the right boss, one that you like and can actually talk to. Don't be afraid of the boss, talk to them! Show them that you have something they want - whether it be a willingness to learn or simply a good work ethic. Good bosses don't rely on a sheet of paper as a good judge of character.


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shortfatbalduglyman
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16 Nov 2017, 3:36 pm

diggity



Yes but Before you "try" a different career, someone has to hire you

Without experience in the field, it takes a lot of time to find someone that will hire you

Quite frankly for my entire life, whenever I applied for jobs, I had a hard time getting a single offer

Applied for a wide variety of roles

Fast food
Grocery store
Accounting
School
Retail
Unpaid internship
Volunteer
Sales
Administrative assistant
Manual labor

Got ignored on almost all of them

Got a couple interviews

Got several jobs

Got fired

The other thing is that I don't have many job skills



alpacka
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18 Nov 2017, 2:00 pm

I have thought the same thing many times as you do, blueghost.

I want to have a job so I can earn my own money, but I have too much bad experience in my bag to cope with the smallest little thing that can appear on a new job. A harsh voice, a angry, irritated person, difficulties to understand what someone means and more, that makes me just want to run home. To me, regular jobs make me very anxious, I think the only way to cope is to find a really good medication and a very few hours to be there. But it´s easier said then done.


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