How can I stop feeling like I want to die?

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I want to want to live. I want to get rid of these endless thoughts and feelings of not being able to bear it and of wanting it all to end.

I've tried therapy and while I thought it was helpful, I got worse during the months I attended. I've tried various different medications for anxiety & depression. I'm currently on sertraline & quetiapine. I saw my psychiatrist yesterday, and will start pregabalin also soon, but don't have much if any faith that it will help. I was somewhat hopeful at first, but that hope reduces with each failed medication.

It seems like the only way to end these thoughts and feelings is to give in to them. I don't want to give into them. But I can't live like this either.

Please tell your therapist and doctor that you are considering the worst of the worst, you are a beautiful and valid member of the human race as meaningless as that may sound, I understand the gravity of such a grim cocoon of feral feelings and swim through such tides but do not lose sight of the horizon. You have much to experience and traverse until the moment you perish, that should not be decided by your own hand, you have many things to hold, feel and scale with those fingers, you must find the reservoir of courage that I know resides within you to have made it this far and see how the lay of the land looks with the guidance of those who can help you out of this black pit, you must inform your therapist of how severe and poisonous these thoughts are, please let them know that you are considering death as a solution to your troubles. Dying is a final thing so far as we can tell from our vantage point, I would like you to have the opportunity to experience the lightening of your burdens.

What medical tests have you done to find what is actually causing your problems? Or if it is all environmental, what caused it?

^ They may be over, but that doesn't mean they cannot still be affecting you. Maybe you need to deal with these things from the past?
I'm notoriously anti-medications, because it just seems to me that so many people are fed all these drugs, and it never actually helps them. They still feel crap and they're on all these pills with all these other side effects. I know two people have just come off seroquel, instead using alternative methods of treatment, and are benefiting. I have just come off benzodiazepines after six years.
But if it is a chemical imbalance, it may be the case they just need to perfect the regimen, a bit of trial and error to find what suits you. I have known others who have experienced this too - they tried different drugs for years and nothing helped, then found the right one for them and benefited greatly. I'm not proposing medications never help if it is a legitimate neurochemical problem, just that often, you even say the words "depression" or "anxiety" and people just throw drugs at you and dismiss it. Beneath the drugs, the real problem is still there, still being buried and ignored.
Which brings in therapies - I know many people experience a bit of "gets worse before it gets better" with talk therapies, because it is bringing up all the things that you may have ignored or not dealt with before. So it may seem as if it's doing more harm than good, but if you can persist through that initial phase where it reawakens issues left untouched, then actually addressing them can bring benefits.
Give in to those thoughts and you will never have the opportunity to experience anything better - or anything at all. This would be all you had for your life. If you persist in trying to make things better for yourself and succeed, one day years from now you'll be looking back and wonder how you could ever have thought suicide was your only option, when there were always others to be tried.
What else are you doing in your lifestyle approach to help combat the effects of depression and anxiety? There's always things you can do to help in your approach to life that don't come in a pill, that for some people, are the best benefit.

Not a doctor but,

Sounds like your exp some forms of "Thought Disorder" if untreated it can lead to psychosis or suicidal behaviour.

I have this (Thought Disorder) and Anti-Psychotics helped after the 7 month period. I wish you all the best.

Also might help if you do some mindfullness or plain vanilla meditation, you may find your "happy place",
a mental vacation (using beach visualization on youtube) if you say..

Also music Can help, but it depends on the type of music, some music like Metal has been proven to affect the chemistry (?) of waters fractals to be somewhat similiar to acid or hot water, which may or may NOT be good for you... Metal music has been proven to help plants grow faster (Mythbusters done an episode on it, they also tested Rap music (I think) and classical (forgot the result) ) so if you are a plant. /s... it 'could' help you whether you are a plant or not. /s ...I hope you get well, I recently just got through suicidal thoughts and actions and the hospital...it CAN get better despite you believing it can't, belief and thoughts might shape your reality to a degree, but with help or support of any type you can get through it...it takes time for your mind to re-evaluate your thoughts and change its wiring or pattern if you work on pushing away the negative thoughts.

I'm also anti-medication, but I don't consider vitamins, neurotransmitter precursors, and minerals to be exactly medication.

As for medical testing, Great Plains Lab's Organic Acid Test is one of the best. It predicts the chemical reactions taking place in your body via the organic acid byproducts which are expelled in the urine.
Second, saliva hormone testing. Or maybe hair mineral testing... but that one is NOT straight-forward to interpret.

You can order them without a doctor's prescription, but they are pricey. The hair mineral test is $80 here in the US. The OAT was something like $400 and the hormone tests are around $300 for a full panel where I get then. Saliva tests only unbound hormone, so that which is actually used by your body.

The oat test found I had almost no serotonin, severe B vitamin deficiencies, and gut infections and I took 5-htp and b vitamins which cleared up some issues immediately.

Of course after years of anxiety having built up, I'm sure that keeps us in a stress response that is hard to break.

Still, when i get my hormones right and don't miss my B vitamins, I feel much better.

Oh, and eating foods i had developed allergies to was pushing my cortisol off the charts. So, I did Meridian Valley's E95 food panel and it gave me great charts that showed VERY accurately what was making me sick.

No doubt I developed some of these allergies due to stomach-turning stress...

Meet up with people and build positive friendships. Prove to yourself that its not all for nothing. The thinking of the thoughts as just thoughts you've had a thousand times and not something whose contents are really worth obsessing over anymore.

If things are really getting bad, consider putting yourself in a mental ward briefly. It can help with finding people to relate too, just not for any long term contact.

There's a game called The Cat Lady, don't know if you're a gamer or not but this is one of the best games I've ever played I'm depressed also and was wanting things to end...I don't know something about this game put things into a different perpestive for me...maybe you can play too?